this is a great thread. Having shared custody now I don't go through these things anymore but before then I absolutely did, especially with DD1 who had severe colic and no one in my family would help me, in fact they now deny she had colic at all (my stepdad especially, though he hates me and likes to gaslight me this way). I remember when she was 6 months, she was crying and crying and my now ex and I took her on a drive at 3am trying to get her to settle, she hadn't slept in about 20 hours, and I started hitting myself on the head and screaming in frustration. I wish someone around me had told me i had PND rather than blaming me and saying I was just being "selfish" and "lazy". DD2 was much easier even while I was still with my abusive ex, she was a calm baby who just slept in our ringsling all the time. Parenting challenging babies and kids is the hardest thing in the world.
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24-04-2014 06:42 #401
24-04-2014 09:53 #402Junior Member
- Join Date
- Apr 2014
I do feel like I am one of the worse mothers. A lot of times I am too soft to my DD and I know it's not good for her personality when she grows up
08-05-2014 23:50 #403
Back to reading this thread it's all I have that may make me feel a tiny bit better.
Today was the worst day I have ever had with DD and although I would never hit her I was still screaming and rough with her which is NOT who I am or want to be. She is a baby and I am a monster. I don't deserve children if I don't have the patience now I have another growing inside me and I feel so sorry for her having me as a mother
I am terrible at this job. If I couldn't handle 1 bad day being today how will I handle 2 children:?
All that replays in my head right now is my anger towards her and all the other mums just staring at me like I was a monster
09-05-2014 00:03 #404
To sum up I am a piece of sh1t who should've followed the signs of not being able to conceive naturally. Maybe I wasn't suppose to have children. Why did I pursue!! This beautiful little girl deserves more 😔
I am not mum material I treated a 3 year old like she was 30! Argued with her like she was a friend! I am ashamed!!
09-05-2014 00:47 #405
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09-05-2014 06:49 #406
@LoCo go easy on yourself. 3 is a challenging age. Forgive yourself and move on. Tomorrow is another day. After all what kind of mum and role model should you be? Not a perfect mum (because who can live up to that), but one that makes mistakes, is human and sometimes gets overwhelmed and tired and reacts when pushed to their limits. It's really the perfect opportunity to show your dd how it's done. Apologise to your dd, explain how you were feeling and how you wish you would've handled it and then let it go and try again tomorrow. Bad mums don't worry bout this stuff... Tired, overwhelmed good mums do Xxx
09-05-2014 08:08 #407
😔 thank you RR and Atropos!
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09-05-2014 08:15 #408
Hugs loco. I have been there. We all have bad days/weeks.
We are human we make mistakes and we teach our kids that making mistakes is ok. That is how we learn. You are teaching her how to be a great mum. That even when you fall and make a mistake, you get up dust off, say sorry and move forward.
You are a good mum you just had a bad day and made a mistake.
Hugs. Hugs. Hugs.
Sent from my SM-N9005 using The Bub Hub mobile app
09-05-2014 08:26 #409
@LoCo - if we handled them well they wouldn't be called bad days. Mummy guilt is the worst. The other night when I was exhausted and there was nothing wrong with DS but he was awake and squawked every time I left the nursery I was feeling ragey, so I picked up my pillow and slammed it down really hard on my bed. It scared the cr@p out of him and he cried. I felt awful. Last week he wouldn't sleep so I just got him back up. I was sitting on the floor and he bit my breast really hard. I pushed him away gently and said 'no', but he was in his grobag so when I pushed him he fell backwards and bumped his head. God I felt worse than awful. But he still loves me.
Today is a brand new day x
09-05-2014 18:34 #410
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