Hiya girls, wow oh wow has it been a loooooonnnnggg time b/t visits....I just wanted to drop in and say g'day and see how you are all doing.... Miss the old group but so proud most have moved on becoz they succeeded in achieving their dreams, needless to say I moved on but not with a babe in arms and it's extremely painful, STILL, sometimes.... In my head I have accepted that I/we no longer wish to keep trying but in my heart I still ache sometimes..... It's often more when I look at Hubby playing with friend's kids and I think, "You poor bugger - u missed out".....sooooooooooo, how are all the lovely ladies out there going xmwahx
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21-01-2013 13:37 #531
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21-01-2013 13:39 #532
OMG darling u are here, how are you Sarah? xxx
21-01-2013 13:46 #533
Hey u Feebs, how are you doing lovely lady? Give me all the good goss that the naughty C is being well n truly kicked in the butt and that you are well in yourself and life in general. xmwahx
Last edited by keziah; 21-01-2013 at 14:05.
22-01-2013 06:47 #534
I know it's hard when you see Sir Richie with kids and think he missed out but boy did you both strike it rich when you met each other. Health, love and happiness is the truest blessing. Well that's what I keep telling myself anyway. It will be three years since we lost our darling girl on Australia Day and three days after that will be her birthday. I'm trying not to get sad but as what as become the norm AF is due on Australia Day so hormones are a little wacky.
It has been a long time coming but our house will be on the market in a week or so and when it sell we will be officially homeless, well that is until Andrew builds our new home, lol. We have a few options, the caravan park down the road at the beach the one way or the caravan park down the road at the beach the other way, . We will live in the Kombi and the tent, pmsl.
I start a new school tomorrow. I forced the department to move me as the psycho who is head of special needs at my old school was not getting any better. She was even cutting my stuff up!!! My new school will be much better with no stress and for the first time in many years they have found me one where I can be full time and not spilt across schools.
As for TTC, it is never going to happen for us unless we at least try some IVF, which incidentally Andrew is open to now but that won't be possible until we build the new house. If Andrew had said this a year ago I would have jumped for joy but would you believe I turned him down! I'm 43 in a few months and have been on the TTC wagon for 10 years, I truly believe we have been through enough emotionally and physically and am too scared to even consider trying again. We are at a point in our lives where we are both happy, healthy and very soon will have little or no mortgage. I want us to both enjoy that. That seems awfully selfish but I am comfortable with my decision.
Ok essay writing over. Anyone else still out there? How are you all?
22-01-2013 15:41 #535
Hello Kez, how are you my darling girl??
I have had a second stint in hospital only weeks after the first lot of surgery, as they stuffed up the filling of the expander....they overfilled it and my scar split and I ended up with an infection....it was totally gross!!! I'm now back to completely flat on my left side. I'll have to wait (am on the waiting list as I'm going public) for up to 12 months just to have expander put back in, and then another operation after that to put the implant in and have my right boob lifted to match the left one....it's put things back a bit and I'm a little ****ed off because I thought I would have my new set of boobs for Christmas...oh well, at least I'm here I guess....it could've been a lot worse!!! I haven't had any really nasty side effects from the medication, only makes me feel tired. I'm going back to the oncologist next week for a check-up and to see how things are going....hopefully all good
I know what you mean about it being hard trying to move on sans a bebe....I have my ups and downs too....especially when others say to Alex "Fee is so great with kids, are you going to try again??"....then we have to explain that it's an absolute no-no with the medication I'm now on and we really don't have the money to throw into any more rounds of IVF anyway. I'm always wondering whether Alex feels sad that he's missed out. It's so hard, but I'm like you Welsh Mummy I've been through enough emotionally and physically and really don't want to try again...
Another of my female bosses announced to me today that she's pregnant....I've now been in a crap mood all afternoon.....
22-01-2013 18:15 #536
I'm so pleased that the nasty thing that tried to take over your body has been kicked into touch but I am sorry to hear about your ongoing surgery nightmares. You are so right, it is better to be flat on one side of your chest than flat out in a box.
Bugger, someone else who is pregnant, 😣! Don't you get sick of that? It is so hard when you work with people who get UTD. I don't blame you at all for being in a crap mood. I'm sure if Alex felt he has missed out he would discuss it with you. You have been through way too much to keep that sort of stuff from each other. Andrew's cousin who had goodness knows how many rounds of IVF had a little girl on 27th December and a good friend at work who also had heaps of IVF is 36 weeks. It is so hard to be happy for them but you know it's the right thing to do. I don't even try to explain our reasons for not TTC anymore, I just say we are done trying and there is just the two of us. Most people accept that but the odd one still says 'it will happen when you least expect it'. Hello if that was going to happen it would have happened during the four or more years when we didn't use contraception and had heaps of random sex just because we could, lol. I have even had some people say they will pray for me, nope sorry that doesn't work either because I have prayed until I have nothing more to say! I'm really good now at saying 'get over it because we have'. I use this one frequently with my mother, lol. She just doesn't know how o move on!
Ok Feebs that's all of my drivel, I'm so glad you are well.
29-01-2013 12:31 #537
Happy 3rd birthday Andie, we will always love and miss you, xxxx
My goodness where have three years gone? Thankfully the flood did not prevent us from going to the beach where we feel closest to Andie. We couldn't get her any balloons this year but I'm sure she understands.
Poor Bundaberg is a complete disaster area and is sadly getting worse. I took all our spare towels and blankets to one of the evac centres yesterday but didn't have much else to give them. I'm not a food horder so couldn't even take any food over, hopefully we should have enough to see us through until supplies start getting here again. Everyone involved is in my heart and prayers, I hope they all stay safe.
I hope you are all safe and well too.
Lots of Love
03-03-2013 19:37 #538Senior Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2012
WelshMummy.... I was just reading through here and was very saddened to see that you've lost two bubs quite far along the way. It's just so hard TTC and having IVF is draining mentally, emotionally and financially, that I just can't imagine getting a BFP and obviously being so excited that it's working, then for it to all go down the shute so far into the pregnancy.
AFM... I haven't had a BFP and this time (3rd IVF cycle) I unfortunately think I'm bust too. Yesterday (Sat) I had one spot of blood, today (Sun) another bigger spot, but that's it. It's like AF is teasing me - if you're going to come, just come and get it over and done with. What I'm so annoyed with is though I told my FS that my usual cycle is 28/29 days, I also told him that AF came early in both my previous IVF cycles (22 + 24 days), obviously due to all those drugs. This means that if yesterdays blood was the start of AF, then my beautiful embie may have implanted, but hadn't yet had any chance to send messages (hormones or whatever it sends) to keep AF away and will have been washed away now. DH is even more furious than I am, as he remembers me telling the FS this, and obviously the FS hasn't factored early periods during IVF cycles into the equation. Has anyone else experienced this? (ie. normal cycles, but early ones following IVF rounds).
08-03-2013 18:17 #539
Wow.. wish id have opened this thread before today. What an awesome thread full of inspiration, support, sincere sincere honesty and some crackin stories & lines to spice things up.
In brief so you get to know me....
Been with my husband for 18yrs. Ttc 8yrs.
Tried IUI/IVF in Qld no luck... and had a early 30s crisis trying to deal with accepting life without kids.
Needed to discover and create a path for our lives without kids. dear hubby packed up and took me overseas to live (holiday not work) for 1 1/2yrs. Came back with a new lease on life and as always unconditional love for each other.
Well past the upset and jealousy stage. Happily embrace mates & families pregnancies now days. Even love roaming in the kids section as the shops.. .. just cause its cute. In a very differental mental and physical place of my journey. But the yerning is still there to be a mum.
Now living wa and being back in the 'real world has made us realise we cant ever really accept no having kids so started our IVF journey again late last year. Hubby is working fifo (gotta refill that bank account somehow).
Lookin forward to chatting with you all. Backtracked quite a bit in your thread ... was quite hooked reading it.
Okay enough from me.
09-03-2013 08:03 #540
Hi MGC, sorry to hear you are on such a journey as many of us on here have been on. I have everything crossed for you.
For me personally after losing a baby at almost 21 weeks, going through the process of giving birth and holding my baby I have decided that is enough for me. First positive came and went in a blink of an eye as we didn't know we could even get pregnant and got a positive blood test 5 days before I had a m/c. IVF has not been an option due to it being too expensive. You never truly accept that there will never be a child in your life but you learn to live with it. We are on another journey now - a life made for two . We bought a small block of land in 2011 in a beautiful area, have just put our house on the market and hopefully will have a sale in the bag soon so we can start our build. I have transferred schools and have almost finished studying a Graduate Certificate in Autism Studies. A whole new life awaits us and who knows with no contraception and TTC being the last thing we think of and not the first and last thing something magical may just happen!
Good luck with your journey, wherever it may take you. I hope you get a BFP soon.
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