Boy am I glad I stumbled accross this thread, I need some advice!
Back in July I had Misoprostal for a missed m/c, after TTC since then had a BFP over the weekend, putting me about 5 weeks now. Since the BFP my emotions are all over the place, I am terrified I am going to lose this one too, I dont want to be intimate with my Fiance cos I dont want to hurt the baby, I'm wondering if I have made a mistake getting pregnant again. I haven't even gone to the Dr to confirm pregnancy because I know he will send me for a scan and I couldnt stand seeing an empty sac again. When that happened last time the Sonographer just said I had to go see another Dr to 'get the sac sucked out.' I don't want to see him again.
I am all over the place and feel so alone, none of my friends have been through this so really dont have anyone to talk to, one friend has tried to tell me to think positive but its a bit hard when my experience from a few months ago is fresh in my mind!
I'm being silly right? I'm trying to put it down to hormones but its hard
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05-10-2010 17:23 #21
05-10-2010 17:36 #22Senior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2010
You are not being silly. We all felt the same way. I would be going to the doctors this week & getting a blood test & a referral for the scan. But wait till 7-8weeks to have the scan, that way its more accurate and you are more likely to see the babies heartbeat.
I was scared to have sex with my DF when I found out I was pregnant. I don't think we did for a while till maybe 8-9 weeks I think. So your not alone there.
You will find lots of lovely ladies here in this thread who have been in your position and felt all the feelings you are feeling.
Good luck and sending you lots of sticky vibes.
05-10-2010 18:51 #23
stephsmum- you are definately not silly. i felt this way too- it was almost a negative feeling when i got a bfp- because i was worried about going through all the heartache all over again. the only advice i can give, well that well all give, is to break it down into small time frames and take it step by step. get to the first scan, then to 12 weeks and so on. don't think too far ahead until you are ready to do so. it's perfectly normal to feel like you are- take heart though in the number of successful pregnancies in this thread- and also that it is more likely to work out (statistically speaking) than it isn;t.
05-10-2010 18:57 #24
fireflies- my EDD is 12 feb- didnt find out sex. sorry to hear you are in a bit of pain. good luck on the name front- you must have some vague list though?
going well thanks- cold has almost gone- god it was a bugger of a thing. warmer weather down here too which is nice for a change. am currently 21 weeks along. went to have a nap today and had a couching fit that ended in a obviosuly m/s is not over yet- i still get nauseous some days.
hi to everyone else- will come back in tomorrow and tidy up some personals- bit tired and so i think i'll retire and watch some telly.
05-10-2010 19:10 #25Senior Member
- Join Date
- Mar 2010
We have 2 names that DF is currently thinking over. Its between Jayden (which he really likes as do I) and also Aiden (which I love). No doubt DF will change his mind and pick either of them.
I really hope the OB listens to me tomorrow. I am in sooo much pain this afternoon since posting & I am over going to the toilet. I will cause a scene at the hospital if I have to...
05-10-2010 20:00 #26
Stephsmum- you are definitely not being silly!! Gees I remember being sooo scared and detached!! As ppl have said here just take it day by day! The only thing that got me through was having multple blood tests to check my hcg levels! I remember crying on my way to our first scan I was so scared!!
Ff- if you want to add I'm having a little boy onto the front page!
Sorry to hear you are struggling! Poor thing! I hope your ob listens to you tomorrow!!
14 more work days til finishing up!
thee- omg I can't believe how close it is getting! Let's hope you don't have to wait too long!!
Em- sorry to hear work is still giving you grief!!! How long?
Shadow, lucky, sniper- hope you are looking after yourselves!!
Good luck tomorrow shadow!!
Well tomorrow is my day off so more pottering around the nursery!! Just got home from swimming so I'm happy to still be keeping it up!! Wonder how much longer I will keep it up for!!!
05-10-2010 20:09 #27Senior Member
- Join Date
- Feb 2010
Hi Steph's mum
You're in the right place, we are here to support you as we all went through miscarriages and I think from what I've read we all felt like you did.
I had two miscarriages and was terrified on my third pregnancy. I got blood tests every 3 days from my doctor to check my levels were rising, and then I had a scan at 6 weeks and then 8, 10, 12. I found it really helpful to have little milestones to reach. But each time I had to get tested, I'd cry and get an upset stomach because like you I had a missed miscarriage, and was scared of seeing that again. Take each hour, each day as it comes, try not to focus on the future, do what you can to distract yourself each hour and just focus on every precious minute.
I read a book called the Power of Now that really helped. Any questions or fears that you want to talk about it, you can do it here cos we're all listening.
AFM I'm 24 weeks, having a beautiful boy and my due date according to my obs is now 25th January. Hooray
06-10-2010 09:43 #28
Firstly, welcome Stephs mum... u are so not being silly!! Everyone else has pretty much said what i would say... I got through by breaking the first 12wks down....at the start 4 or 6wks between DR visits is so long!! I seen doc at 4 and 6wks, Scan at 8.5, Ob at 9.5, scan at 12....then seen GP again at 13wks. Now only another 2 and i go back again Try not to stress, take each day as it comes... If ur scared about a scan, do u feel u can tell ur Doc this? Ive heard some people not having an early scan and just having a 12wk one. As nervous as u are, AFTER a scan and seeing its little heart beating, u are on cloud 9 all day and it does help relieve some fear.
Hi girlies...glad to hear we're all travelling well... Not long to go now for some of u, and the rest arent too far behind either!!
AFM - seen the Dragon in law yesterday and told her... she was TOO excited for my liking...bounced up and down and hugged DP and I...but for DP i ignored my irritation and negative feelings and brought out that good old fake smile i perfected when working with difficult ppl...lol. I guess it went ok...
And apart from that travelling well... Went into the target baby sale...OMG but was very controlled and walked out with only a pack of 4 bottles (Just incase)
06-10-2010 12:49 #29
Thanks for the encouraging words, have made an appt for the Dr on Friday morning, start the ball rolling, so right now my goal is to make it to that appointment without crying . I'm so scared of going for my first scan, am hoping to be able to find a friend to come with me and hold my hand if my partner cant make it!
06-10-2010 14:53 #30
good idea taking a support person with u. I remember my first U/S... long story short id had a VERYYYYY stressful few days before and figured because of that stress it was all over red rover... I remember i didnt cry leading up, and was making myself breathe deep to try and calm myself down..... but held my breath once on the table with gel untill the sono went "oh theres the little one.." and mum followed it up with "thats the heartbeat right??" ...... THEN i cried like a baby...lol Best of luck to u!!
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