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  1. #1
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    Default help with 7 week old not day sleeping !

    he grunts and squirms and strains, goes red in the face and resists when put in his bed.
    he will be asleep when in my arms and even for a minute or two after being swaddled and put down ..... but then seems to realise where he is and just wants to get out ....the grunts do turn into squeals if he's not looked in on and occasionally he will go into a frantic half asleep state after about an hour..... this is usually just during the day but as started happening with his early morn feeds... around 4am - he used to go back down so easily then....
    what is his problem ? what am i doing wrong?
    and during the day when awake he has to be held .... no more than 5 miutes in his play chair thingy .....I am getting frustrated and depressed as my days are just given up to holding him ALL the time.....
    HELP PLEASE.... any insight and advce is most welcome ...

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    My DS was like this at that age. Day sleep point blank refused to sleep in his cradle. The things I tried/eliminated were:
    • Make the room as dark as possible. My DS was and still is an extremely alert baby and needed no distraction and obviously been pitch black at night time there was none. You can buy relatively cheap sun block out curtains at spotlight. I have also heard of people putting a plain baby blanket on the side of the cot so the baby cant see out and be distracted. I would do this under observation though due to SIDS risks of not enough airflow.
    • I ended up realising though my DS hated his cradle and as soon as i moved him to his cot (it fit in our room) he was a much better sleeper, I dont know why.
    • He also ended up having great day sleep in a vibrating bouncer or a swing. If you can borrow or buy either and try it I highly recommend them. During the day (under supervision) if thats where he would sleep I left him there and I had a lay down on the lounge if thats what it took for him to sleep.
    • All else fails, buy and ergo, pop him in and I can almost bet that because he is wants to be with mum he will go to sleep
    • Also I found if I didnt get him down a little before he started getting tired he got overtired and overstimulated so I really had to be on the ball watching for his tired signs.
    Its really hard to find what works ( I found it hard). It does all get a bit easier as they get older usally and settle in.

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    It's just the age. They get much more aware of what and who is around them. I used to put my ds in his cot with my arm still tucked around him as though he were in my arms. Then I would slowly move my arm away.
    It is a good idea to get a good start on sleep and settling as early as possible. But u need to find a system that both bub and u e happy with.

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    Have you tried babywearing. He obviously feels settled and comforted by being held and close to you. This allows him to continue feeling secure while you can get on with your tasks. Honestly, he is still so little, enjoy it, even though right now you are frustrated by it I guarantee you that in a year or two you will miss it!

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    Quote Originally Posted by brogeybear View Post
    Have you tried babywearing. He obviously feels settled and comforted by being held and close to you. This allows him to continue feeling secure while you can get on with your tasks. Honestly, he is still so little, enjoy it, even though right now you are frustrated by it I guarantee you that in a year or two you will miss it!

    my sling was the best purchase ever!

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    Thanks for the suggestions .....

    We've had a little progress .... can get him into bed & in a light sleep ...... but getting him to stay asleep for more than half an hour now thats another thing !!!

    Do you think he's hungary ??? Though he seems happy to drift off while feeding !!!

    Oh dear there goes the wailing again !!!

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    deese - hang in there my DS was exactly the same. What you described sounds almost identical to my little boy when he was a newborn. As much as we love our little ones it is bloody hard when they are like this. Some things that helped us:

    * A baby carrier. We had a baby bjorn and when all else failed I would put him in this and head for a walk outside. Usually he would fall asleep before getting to the end of the street.

    *Elevating the head of his cot a little (just with phone books). Make sure you elevate the cot and not the mattress. (Turns out this helped because our DS had reflux but some babies without reflux also like the slight elevation)

    * The baby swing and bouncer. (We have a fisher price one). At first he didn't like it but after a while he did. It didn't work to stop him crying but if we put him in it while he was happy, we could buy ourselves a little time for eating etc and occasionally he would fall asleep in there.

    * Calling on friends or family to come over. Most people love baby cuddles and I would use their cuddle time to shower, sleep, eat or to just get out of the house for half an hour

    *Our DS ended up being diagnosed with reflux so eventually once it was diagnosed the medication helped. (Although an unsettled baby does not always mean reflux).

    * time time time... at about 8-10 weeks DS started to settle. It was like he just suddenly seemed more comfortable in this world and was content enough to start sleeping in his cot.

    Keep persisting with the day sleeps in his basinet/cot as eventually you will get there but in the mean time do what you have to do to survive. Some babies just take a little longer to get into a comfortable routine.

    Everyone kept telling me and I didn't believe it at the time but it WILL get easier. Newborns can be really hard work. For quite a while I wondered what I had got myself into but now it is all so much better and I promise it will get better for you too.

    In the meantime hang in there and get help from friends and family if you can.

    these are for you.

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    Is he getting a full feed before drifting off to sleep? Maybe he isn't getting the 'hindmilk', which is richer and has more calories....

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    It won't help but "it will pass" I promise!
    My DD was shocking from 6wks to 12 weeks. Would not sleep in her room/cot after being a perfect little sleeper for the first month of her life. We would have screaming fits at tea time as we would try to put her down but her sleep was soooo light that any movement in our arms and she was awake.
    Definately persevere with the basinet but what we found was that she hated the silence/dark when she was in that state. We ended up of an evening for a nap propping her between cushions on the couch with lights/tv/voices and she would more often or not be ok for a little while (maybe 1/2 an hour). As soon as my MIL new what a rough trot we were having with her, every few days an Aunt or Uncle would "pop around" right on tea time and insist they had no where to be and hold/rock her while DH and I ate tea at the same time instead of taking it in shifts!
    If you can, get some help! Don't be scared to ask!! You may be surprised how helpful family can be and who doesn't like cuddling a baby - for them it is a treat, but for you it is a godsend!
    Good luck with it!

  10. #10
    AndrewTheEmu is offline Bubhub Ambassador - tongue in cheek
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    If hes gruntings, squirming and going red in the face when you lye him horizonal it could be gas in his belly. DD used to do this and i found the only thing that helped was holding her upright/burping her a good 4 times. The squeals could be from discomfort too. If it is gas/needing to be burped it generally wont happen at night if they are very sleepy when feeding because they dont suck down as much air when they are really relaxed, but when awake/alert and gulping it down they can take quite a bit of air with the milk. Have you tried burping during feeds and afterwards? Tummy rubs also help if the gas has worked its way down to the intestine


 

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