oh and chloeandme, thank you SO much for that link. It was exactly what I was after and really really helpful, you're a gem
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02-10-2010 14:46 #91
02-10-2010 16:27 #92
Hi Em1984 -
Firstly - I think Gaye would be fine with me choosing someone that suited me, but for me it would be preferable to know that she and the second middy got along and worked well together as well as me clicking with them both.
Secondly - I feel 110% easily. DH is completely supportive. But we have the experience of a pretty out of control hospital birth that ended in emergency caesar with our DS. Neither of us want to go through anything like that again. We are very happy with this choice- it suits us and our life philosophy so much better.
02-10-2010 16:39 #93xxxxxxxxxx
- Join Date
- Jan 2007
Still around - still pregnant. I'm hoping tonight is the night but this belly babe will probably keep me hanging another 2 weeks
will let you guys know as soon as anything happens!
02-10-2010 16:49 #94
Last edited by traseal; 24-01-2011 at 13:14.
02-10-2010 16:50 #95
02-10-2010 17:08 #96
If I was you, I would consider hiring another midwife, the fact that she wasn't 100% in the know about the state of collaborative agreements (or the entire lack of requirement for them at the moment)
As well as her saying oh thats fine you don't want internals, I'll just do an internal.. has alarm bells screaming.
Talk to some more midwifes, it is never too late to find a with woman midwife that has total and complete trust in an unhindered birth.
Internals are not required, not based on evidence base practise, and is basically telling you, her fear of the birthing process is more important to assuage, than your need to not have your body violated. It seems really wrong to acquiesce to an intervention against your wishes and instinct simply to assuage her need to "make sure" your body is 'ready' to start the rejection reflex . I think it demonstrates that she has fears surrounding birth and womens bodies ability to birth as well as a possible lack of understanding in the concept of "unhindered birth" as internals at or around transmission are really, really hindering, painful and interrupt the important hormone flow and production, increase adrenaline which is the ANTI labour drug, and decreasing the safety of the birth.
If she's uncomfortable now and you decide to go ahead there is every chance she decides to assault you and give you an internal in labour anyway, against your wishes.
please get some consumer feedback on other with women midwives in your area. It is NEVER too late to ensure you have the right support people for your birth.
Last edited by Looshkin; 02-10-2010 at 17:12.
02-10-2010 17:15 #97
I hadn't thought about internals, I think I would like to make sure I was fully dilated before pushing - what is your thinking behind not wanting any?
Has your middy explained herself to you, or are you feeling that she isn't listening?
02-10-2010 18:00 #98
Last edited by traseal; 24-01-2011 at 13:15.
03-10-2010 17:12 #99
Traseal - I think anyone who is in homebirth midwifery has an open mind. I'm sure you can discuss with her and reach a point of understanding. Let me know how it goes.
03-10-2010 23:09 #100
Hi All I've been slack posting on here but have been reading and following how everyone is going.
Just a bit of an update from here. Today I had a bit of brown (and tiny bit of pink at one stage) spotting for the fourth bl**dy time (no pun intended). On Wednesday, last time I had it I also passed a tiny clot (about half the size of a five cent piece). No cramping, but still driving me batty and tonight burst into tears about it (especially when I saw the pink) feeling very overwhelmed and worried.
I know that it can be fine, but due to the fact that it's happened a number of times now I'm throwing my "only one scan please" thoughts away and going to the Doc to get a referral for a quick checkup one tomorrow. I'm 12 weeks tomorrow. Asked midwife what she thought and she said to never follow what anyone else thinks during pregnancy and to follow what I feel, so if I feel it would help me to get reassurance go for it. Think I will, but am asking for just a quick scan to check on bubs and bleeding. Don't want an internal so fingers crossed they can get something externally.
Am hoping that all is well and bubba is strong and kicking. My DS 2.5 adores the baby so much he spent about 20 minutes today just sitting there stroking my belly, giving the baby kisses and telling it how much it loves it and how he's going to take good care of it. He randomly runs up to me about 10 times a day and says "Mummy I love our baby so much. I love my baby brother or sister more than anything!!"
Hopefully the scan can put my mind at ease so I can spend more time relaxing and enjoying pregnancy rather than being nervous about when the next bout of spotting will come or if something's wrong!
Hugs to all, I'm off to bed
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