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  1. #51
    DaughteroftheForest's Avatar
    DaughteroftheForest is offline Sometimes you have to forget what you want in order to remember what you deserve
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    That must be really frustrating! It's none of their business how many kids you have (and I know plenty of lovely, intelligent only children )

    I get the opposite, I have DS, DD and when we announced we were having a 3rd it was 'Haven't you got enough already??'. Like if we have one of eavh then we should be content I think that people will have an opinion no matter what you do!

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    twofornow  (28-05-2011)

  3. #52
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    I actually blogged about this recently. My MIL was appalled at the suggestion our DD might be an only child (like me).

    We haven't said definitely no more but it's on the cards and we're both happy with it. MIL made it clear she thinks that is akin to saying we're planning to raise an axe murderer.

    She didn't like my blog

  4. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paul64 View Post
    Hi all.

    I thought I'd swing by this area and take a bit of a read. Wow! I'm glad I did. I now feel my wifey and I aren't the only ones under enormous pressure to have more little ones. Our attempts to conceive were perilous with IVF, all dignity out the window for both of us...the pregnancy was rather good with only a tad of morning sickness wifey suffered. And that's about when the wheels fell off. The delivery was near tragic for both bubs and wifey. But now, almost 10 months down the track, both bubs and wifey are going gangbusters.

    I have no desire for another child what-so-ever. Our little girl is perfect and that is such a bonus for us both. I'm about to turn 47 and wifey will be 41 this year. I figure we pour all our resources into this one little bub and give her all the best things in life. Schooling, nutrition, holidays, the arts, sports and eventually, higher education.

    There is a little PND here but it's being dealt with well and things are working out for the better over time and with good counselling. Our sex life is still non-existent from the traumatic birth but we're working on that very slowly.

    All our friends and family were asking for years, "when will you have a child", now that we do, now all they ask is "when will you have another". Every time I need to clench my teeth to stop from saying what I feel I need to say to them....or rather what I want to say to them. It wouldn't be productive but it would sure make me feel a whole lot better. Family hey...you can't pick'em. In the very near future I think I'm going to need to tell them how we feel in very certain terms and let them deal with their own reactions, otherwise I will eventually explode and totally over react in the worst possible way.

    God I feel better now. Sorry for going on, but just getting this down in writing has made me feel so much better and knowing you all are going through the same thing and fully understand is pure gold....Thankyou.

    Paul
    SA
    I cannot believe some people! After everything you and your wife went through, people have the nerve to ask already, when the next one will be on the cards!

    You sound like a very supportive husband and father and I wish you all the best with raising you precious little girl. It sounds like she has had a wonderful start to be blessed with such loving parents.

    We have one of each and I have recently discovered I am pregnant with our 3rd. It saddens me that I am actually worried about telling some of our family, in fear of their reaction. I mean we have one of each, what more could we want? We are only having 3, not 10! Rant over, I just wish people would be quiet, its not their life so why they feel the need to judge is a mystery to me! My sister only wants one child as she honestly believes that is all she could cope with, good on her for being honest and doing what suits her rather than what society thinks she should do !

  5. #54
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    When i saw this topic I just had to respond, I absolutely hear you!!!

    DH and I have been together for 13 years and only had our first child last year, this was by choice, not due to any problems with conception. This shocked and confused many people and got every comment under the sun as we just weren't sure if we wanted kids or not. Also it was mostly due to me having a severe phobia of vomiting and I didn't think I could handle the pregnancy but I took the leap, I did it (my first words to my mum when DD was born lol) so I was very proud of myself and happy that we were a family.

    Now we constantly get asked when we are having more.... Grrrr how's about you have the damn baby!!!! Lol pregnancy ain't always easy and let's not even talk financials and I've heard every response to those "excuses" too!!!!

    DH now responds with "nah we aren't going to risk it again" and I mist admit it stops people in their tracks. When they look confused he says "we were blessed with a happy, beautiful child without a complicated pregnancy or birth and no issues thus far" next time that could be different so this is how it will stay.

    Might sound strange to some to respond that way but I like his thinking. We truly were blessed an even in this day and age things can still go wrong and they didn't so we consider ourselves extremely lucky

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  7. #55
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    People can be so stooopid! Personally I would like another bub ( but 2 is plenty for me!). My dh has other ideas and would be quite happy with just dd. He is an only child and frankly he is a lot more normal and balanced than me and many others I know who have siblings! know lots of lovely, normal and well adjusted only children so bull&hit to those who say otherwise !


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    My son is almost 4 and a half.. Im 31 my husband is 35 and we are STILL being asked of we'll have any more kids :-\ I know it's usually just a conversation starter but geezer!

    ***Happy to be a Mummy & Daddy of ONE! :-) ***


 

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