At 20w I was told my baby was incompatable with life & to terminate- my 20 week scan had showed a major congenital abnormality & I had almost no amniotic fluid left.
I chose to continue and my little girl beat all the odds to survive. She has a serious chronic condition but is the most beautiful little smiley girl with a quality of life just as good as any other 6 month old. I call her high maintenance as she has a lot of medical needs but I can't imagine life without her. Keeping her was the best decision we ever made. 💕
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13-03-2015 23:17 #161
14-03-2015 06:09 #162Senior Member
- Join Date
- Jun 2011
I would terminate. Like so many others have said it would not be a light decision. Equine mum you have shared a situation I see so many people in and I can understand. Thank you for sharing. It's exhausting. Initially, the parents see a baby but I think we fail to realise the baby may never grow up. Then come the surgeries the complications of pneumonia feeding urine infections, limb contractures. And a child/adult who can't fully express is suffering. I am not denying the love but it's a commitment and parents must be ready to give up a lot for a long time. I have seen families re locate and leave the adult in the hands of carers as they could not deal with the personality the person develops. There are stories of strength and love, of exhaustion and abandonment and also stories of neglect and abuse. My cousin had congenital rubella. That is her mother had rubella when in her late first trimester. She knew tha abnormalities but chose to keep the baby. She's in her 20s now. Can't see clearly can't hear she's short has heart defects she's a very nice beautiful person but alone, socially isolated. And she does not like it.
14-03-2015 09:53 #163Senior Member
- Join Date
- May 2006
Its such a tough decision, and I've swung back and forth on it many times over the years. I used to think I would never have a termination, I've always been pro choice, but I was sure I wouldn't have one, but I ended up in that position and did have a termination for medical reasons, i really sad about it for a long time, but I realise now that it was the right decision. I would terminate if my pregnancy would cause me to die, no question. My alive children come first always, i would never leave them without a mother if i had a choice.
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