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  1. #481
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    Morning ladies

    Well just a quick post today we did a HPT this morning 12 days past ovulation and a BFN not even a hint of a second line so looks like this is not my time. Im completely shattered as I had two great quality blasts transfered. DH is shattered and dosent want to continue trying. That has shattered me even more as I do. I dont even know what to ask the dr when I see him in two weeks as what more can you do. We even looked at adoption last year but under the australian law im too old apparently and it can take upto 7 years. Not sure what my next steps will be I guess there will be alot of soul searching over the coming weeks for both DH and I.

    Sorry to be all about me ladies this is my only release as we didnt tell our family or friends this time for this reason.

    sooz I hope you are doing ok after your awful week.

    I hope you are all ok and have a wonderful weekend XOX

  2. #482
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    lilly, I am so sorry that htis one didn'twork for you, take your time to heal and I hope that you and DH work out what is best going forward.

  3. #483
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    Dear PennyPC, thank you so much for your post, it really helped. Just a little bit of care and understanding can be such a healing salve. So grateful for this thread. Thank you Micca and Lilly40 for your care and kind words also.

    Lilly40, so sorry to hear of your heartbreak. Wait to see what your blood test says for definitive answer, but understand a BFN on your HPT does not give you much hope. It’s so emotionally taxing going through this whole process. Some time to heal, recoup and then maybe you can broach continuing with your DH. Sometimes it’s hard to understand how emotionally challenging it can be for our other halves as we tend to get so absorbed in all of the dramas we have to go through whilst they have to sit patiently on the sideline waiting and hoping. Big hugs to you and spend some time spoiling yourself and doing whatever you need to make yourself feel special.

    Micca, how’s the human pin cushion? Are you up to 4 injections a day yet? You’re such an industrious thing with all of your baking and stewing, etc. Will we see you on the next Master Chef series?

    AFM, some caring posts from the lovely ladies on this forum, a few glasses of bubbly and lots of weeding and baking today has kept me from dwelling too much on my downer day Thursday. I'm not that thrilled with FS, she is not very good at explaining things, but it seems that my 7 days of spotting may have made it harder to pinpoint day 1 for me, so she feels that is why I had such a poor cycle. My cycle is usually very regular and predictable, but it looks like I may need to do a down reg cycle (pill &, nasal spray) next month if I have prolonged spotting again. DHEA is a definite no with FS as is Human growth hormone and no other suggestions were offered. Not sure if I should stay with her or move to another clinic or specialist, but at a loss as to who and where in Melbourne. It’s not one of those topics you can just start chatting about with anyone, like finding a good mechanic, sparky or hairdresser, yet it’s so damn important.

    Off to throw some dinner together now and then I’m going to settle in and watch the Chipmunk movie being the big kid that I am. Take care everyone.

    Ciao for now Sooz xo

  4. #484
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    I just typed the longest post ever and it disappeared grrrrrr

  5. #485
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    Sorry ladies I cannot remember what i said now lol

    Lilly so sorry for your news Look after yourself, am thinking of you

    Micca how is the jabbing going? You are so full of life and keep yourself so busy, your posts make me tired lol

    Sooz I can so relate to you with the lack of info from FS, mine does not go into detail about anything. I love him but he definitely does not explain things properly, it is not right

    Hi to everyone else, Penny, Pippy

    AFM - I don't think I will be cycling now until July grrrrr. I am still interstate and cannot see me back in time for my June cycle. I am so frustrated, I feel like we have been trying to get started again forever and we just never seem to get there

  6. #486
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    hi gals

    Lilly.... Im sorry that you got a BFN... I would still hold some hope its not over until the beta sings... do your best to stay sane and not too depressed. I hope that you can stay busy this weekend....
    I hope you do give IVF another go..the more you try you will end up with a baby...look at all the goes it took for kismet to get a BFP...perseverence is the key and a good FS is the path to success....maybe change FS to one that takes on us hopeless cases....do the full DHEA, ask for growth hormone...figure out what sort of cycle you want..and really push for it and see what happens...Big Hugs....

    Sooz....glad to hear that you have had some productive distractions...I hope the baking was yummy.
    I went on the ocp prior to this cycle and I must say it made the cycle so much easier for sorting out all the dates, no stress about AF or ovulation it was much better...Ill find out monday and see how the follies are...but I think you will find out it is much better, I would also push for lucerin rather than syneral as it has a better suppression profile and can lead to better results....
    Chin up chickee... you have only one cycle under your belt early days yet... Your next IVF cycle could be a winner with a BFP.... think of this one as a test drive, your FS would have learnt a lot from this cycle about your hormones and how you respond.. Go for cycle #2... you can do this...

    Soclose....ooooh how frustrating to have to wait until july...aaaagh...thats worth a scream of frustration...can you just bite the bullet and take time off???

    AFM
    well you will be proud of me I had a quiet day for once..... yep unbelievable as that sounds.........
    I had to work for a few hours this am and then I have spent the day relaxing in front of the TV, and made cookies for work tomorrow
    Mostly I was forced by my body to slow down.... as my ovaries are definately tweeking a bit on the tender side of things this round...I have never had that before the right is worse than the left but at least its both, and I am feeling a bit headachy and really tired...I had a nana nap this arvo for an hour or so...lol..lol.... devine. Im definately going to go to bed early tonight.

    I hope I can make the next 5 days of work..... fingers crossed there is no cysts...Im a little worried...uss in 2 days to find out...my estrogen will just keep climbing and you start to feel a little yukky when it gets really high.... oh well more protein and fluids..got to keep that ovarian hyperstimulation away....my record oestrogen is 18,000 at trigger...and I was not feeling the best after that...lol..lol...
    Im sure EPU will be friday... going up to sydney on thurs... so I will be prepared if this happens..

    Tonight is the 4 injections..yep the human pin cushion...lol...lol.. .luveris,GonalF,lupron and human growth hormone... just as well there is lots of room on my tummy....lol..so long as they achieve the job and I get lots of great eggies....with good quality I will be happy...blasts would be good...

    I hope everyone has a great weekend....Im working tomorrow...I hope it is an ok day...

    Im bunkering in with the TV and blankie and a steak...lol...lots of rain due sunday, that will make everyone happy here.....

    xxxx
    Last edited by micca; 29-05-2010 at 19:45.

  7. #487
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    Hi lovely ladies,

    I'm off to have a lining scan this morning, so that will let us know if we can have a transfer this week. I have been having a bad run with my lining, so we have our fingers crossed!

    Love to all, I hope everyone is doing OK, no matter where you are in your journey at the moment!

    Love Goldy

  8. #488
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    Hi Ladies

    Goldy - hope all goes well today with your lining scan fingers crossed for you.

    Micca - how sounds like you are growing some good follies there hopefully you dont feel too weighed down by them but its all for a good cause.

    soclose - July will be here before you know it hopefully I will be back on the IVF train then too.

    Sooz Im in Melbourne and go to Monash IVF the nurses are lovely and my FS seems pretty good he explains everything and sits there paitently while I go through my note book with step by step blow by blow run down of my cycle and then answers all my questions I write down from everything I have learnt from all the ladies on this forum. He is very good its just me who is the dud Im a bit broken on the insides and have had various ops to fix everything. So Im not the easiest case for him. The only thing I havent asked or he hasnt offered me is the DHEA . I will be asking this time around though my appointment is next Monday he is very caring.

    Ok well after crying my eyes out on Saturday and Saturday night with lots of going nowhere conversations with DH Sunday finally came around. We pulled ourselves together went and had lunch and had some d&m's and have agreed to give it another go. Especially when we got Grade A and B blasts this time. Just none to freeze unfortunately. I think DH had convienced himself it was going to work as when we had the transfer we were told they were two good ones. Unfotunately it didnt work probably because of my dud lining. It really hit him hard this time. So I have my appointment with the FS on Monday to discuss where to from here.

    In the meantime I have a very bad irratation from all the progesterone and still have to have my BT but I know the outcome so just need to get that out of the way so we can move forward.

    To all the lovely ladies on this site who give me the strength and inspiration to carry on with my dream of becoming a mum I thank you all XOX

  9. #489
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    hi gals

    Goldy
    ...good luck with your USS I hope that the lining is nice and thick for you...we will both be in the 2ww together....

    Lilly... Big hugs for you and your DH it can be so hard, Im still rooting for you and waiting for the beta... Im still holding out hope for you. I know its hard not to feel hopeless and let down by your body at this stage. Remember a baby is a challange that can be a bump for some and Mt everest for others... sometimes its the path that gets you there that shapes your compassionate nature and makes you the most amazing mother.
    Ask the FS about prednisone with the cycle as well....

    Sooz I hope you are getting back on the and to IVF and beginning to sort out a next cycle...remember the next could be THE ONE

    Penny... how are you going,...hows the cycle organisation going. I hope the counseller the second time around is not such a ****...lol

    Soclose... Hang in there I know the wait can be sooooo long.

    AFM
    Well a busy day would be an understatement.....
    blood test this am...still waiting for results grrr...then the drive for the uss,
    Well all your positive mojo worked as the good news there was no cysts on the uss...YAY
    I had a total of 18 follicles..wow..!!
    12 on right and 6 on the left ...so the left ovary is sort of playing.
    The sizes were all fabulous...ranging from one 20mm to the rest being 15-18mm...and they were all the same size..no tiddlers..so that is great news. My lining was a nice 10mm...which is great (its usually a bit too thick at 14mm..and 10mm is more like my natural cycle)
    My estrogen was 12,500 at day 9 stims...woohoo ....more of those protein meals and hydralyte..stay away OHSS.!!!.
    I so feel like a verteran Barbie at the moment... as the cycle has timed how I thought it would...lol..lol..lol....
    Soooo trigger wednesday and Egg pick up friday..... rock on ... it means that I have someone to pick me up ...my BFF let me down today by saying that she could not pick me up for a monday ER as we planned...its dissappointing to be right in your estimation of the unreliable nature of my BFF... she can do friday..only because she happens to be in town for her son... not me..lol... so in a way it is lucky

    WOOO HOOO rock on egg collection

    hmmm maybe the growth hormone is working...I was certainly very perky at work today.....lol..lol..lol...

    Acupuncture tomorrow after work..so I will be able to relay some good news....looking forward to those needles....

    Speaking of needles...my 4 gems are due now...lol

    off to watch desperate houswives...
    xxxxxxx

  10. #490
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    Sorry for not messaging for a while, although I've been sneeking a peek and keeping up with all your news, and thinking of you all.

    I've an appointment with FS later today and start injecting on Thursday. Still aiming for egg pickup on 16th ready for our ICSI.

    Am completely lost and just following FS instructions word for word.

    I must admit, my usual happy demeanor had been replaced by 'the ***** from hell' !! I've developed mood swings, constant headaches, flushes and all this whilst seriously dieting and attempting to exercise, and working Early, late and Night shift all in the same week.

    My poor DH is trying to help, but I'm ready to murder him when on my only day off, with tonnes of housework ahead - he dares to lecture me that I need to exercise in order to maximize my weight loss....

    On the weightloss front, I've cut out everything naughty and portion controlled the rest - so over the last 6 weeks I've lost 10kgs so far, and although I'm pleased I just feel I should have done better. I'm seriously vertically challenged and although previously I felt confident with my size, which had gradually increased over the years- I now feel like a big fat blob.

    Oh well that's enough moaning - back to the delights of housework. And I promise to keep my updates frequent in future.


 

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