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    Default My little girl was with her grandma when she died

    My brave little girl mikayla was home alone yesterday with her grandma on my ex's partners side when grandma had a fall and we think a heart attack. Mikayla thought she was dreaming yesterday morning while in bed and heard her grandma saying help me i'm falling. Mikayla went to get the phone upset and called her daddy has he and his dad were at the markets and told him what happened. So he called ambulances and came right over. The ambulance people were already there trying to get her heart beating again. From about 6.20am to 7.10am they think she had a heart attack. At 6.45am he called me to come around and get mikayla. They managed to get a slight heart beat but on the way to hospital her heart stopped 3 times. So when her daddy and grandad arrived they told doctors to turn off the machine. Mikayla who is 6 hasn't said much about it . But i know she did cry and is upset. My other child who is 4 is upset but doesn't understand. So how to you explain to little kids about death ect. Thanks Aly

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    I have no answers or suggestions, but couldn't read and not give hugs for your brave little girl.

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    That can't be easy for her to deal with. The only thing I can suggest is to be there for her when she's ready to talk about it.

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    wow..what a brave little girl

    You really need to be there for her..talk talk and talk more about what happened and where her grandma is now...let her open up and ask questions etc...and DON'T be afraid to cry

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    There's a lot of good books now written for kids aimed at a kids level that explains death etc available at most good books shops, Amazon books and also Tobin Brothers have some - maybe also check out your local library.

    Seeing that you DD was with Grandma, I'd see your GP ASAP and get a referral to a counsellor (often bulk billed if referred) or check out your local council for a list of good children's councillors.

    Normally a book, and understanding sensible parent can help a child through the trauma of losing a grandparent, but seeing your DD was home alone with Grandma and also made the phone call she may need extra help - especially if she has guilt/what-if issues (very common)

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    I dont have the answers .. but I guess .. imo .. the best thing .. is dont LIE ..

    if you have faith .. then talk to her about that .. if not .. then just explain to her .. that grandma was old .. and sometimes when people get old, really old then they get sick ... I would explain to her that grandma's heart stopped working ... and that she died.

    Jack knew when his great grandfather died .. he didn't see it - but he knew (I was upset) .. and he knows that his heart stopped working .. and that he died ... he doesn't ask much about it .. but he states it - so i assume he gets it.

    Sometimes its good to ask THEM what they think happened too - to see how they are thinking, and see if they need clarification or not .. if she asks where Grandma is - you could always start with " hon .. where do you think she is?" - and follow her lead ... if you know what I mean??

    I hope she settles soon - and starts chatting about it a little
    I"m sorry for your loss ..

    Jenny

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    Thank you all who have replied with your suport and advice. we are greatful. Thanks again Ally

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    I am so very sorry for your loss.

    Lots of hugs for you & your brave little girl.



 

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