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  1. #581
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    Lovebirds some one earlier in the thread mentioned a song called My Name by George Canyon I would recommend listening to the link (not necessarily watch the clip). I know that it helped me a little to listen to it, I can't watch the clip though as it makes me cry a lot.

  2. #582
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    lovebirds. i'm so sorry for your very real loss. i totally understand that feeling of betrayal. we lost our baby boy at nearly 18 weeks but he'd passed away just over 2 weeks earlier. i was still throwing up and feeling nauseated all day. i hated my body for tricking me like that. but it doesn't help - instead i am now trying to think in a more positive light that my body was trying so hard to be a good mum that it didn't want to let go of my boy... small comfort but i'll take what i can get

    we're putting TTC on hold indefinitely at the moment, i can't bear the thought of losing another child or putting my DH and DD through it again. take all the time you need to feel ready again. don't feel silly for grieving and taking the time to mourn the loss of your child.

    i was writting a blog about my family moving to Melbourne which has turned into a blog about losing Jonathon. i suppose it helps to know that people can understand what i'm going through without me having to spell it out time and time again. feel free to have a read here - th melbourne chapter

  3. #583
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    Lovebirds I'm so sorry to hear what you are going through. Take the time you need to rest, escaping from the world for awhile helped me.

    Withoutpeanut - I'm ready to TTC straight away this time, which surprised my DH . However waiting on more results. I personally would always wait at least one month - but that's just me. I think it's good for the preg hormone to leave your system and for things to go back to "normal" first.

    Cherished - all the best with your FS appts next week!

    HCG is nearly below 0, last test is that it was 20. The specialist was great, it couldn't have gone better. He took me seriously, didn't promise miracles of finding an answer, but held out hope and was informative. He is following up on the results of the sample (something I couldn't bare doing 1st time round but this time I want answers!) he ordered a stack of blood tests for me, how well my blood clots, thyroid etc. I go back in a month for results of all tests.

  4. #584
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    Thank you again for all your kind words. What a beautiful soft place this is to land in such a hard time.

    GonnabeaGR8mum - that's a beautiful way to think of it and something I havent actually managed to think until I read what you wrote. But you are right. There was just so much love there and I was protecting our little one so well, that it stayed safe in there for longer than we knew. Thank you for your post. It really has given me a positive way to look at the feeling of untrust I have for my body. I am just so sorry that you had to go through the loss of your beautiful son. I cant even begin to imagine how hard that must have been for you. I have only just met you but I can tell that you ARE gonna be a great mum.

    Jazz1910 - that song is so beautiful. Of course I bawled my eyes out, but wow, what a beautiful song with speaks volumes of how I'm feeling right now. It's nice to hear it in such pretty words.

    Withoutpeanut - I like to get second opinions too Its amazing how much medical opinions vary from professional to professional. I've been reading medical journals (rather than Mr Google) and cant seem to find any validated evidence that I'd be any more likely to miscarry a pregnancy if I was to conceive before I got AF then if I fell in the months after. In fact alot of the research suggest in the month after a miscarriage you are more fertile. It appears most of the recommendations to wait for AF come from the idea that dating is easier if they have an AF to go by. I honestly dont feel like I can handle waiting and missing out on an opportunity to fall pregnant again so DH and I will just try when my body feels ready and see what happens. I figure if I use Maybe Baby too at least I'll have a bit of an idea on ovulation too to help the doctors with dating. And if I end up not falling pregnant and getting AF, at least I'll know I tried and wont feel like I've missed our chance iykwim.

    Preggle - I've been hibenating for the last few days. It's been very healing for me. DH and I have spent all week with each other (he took the week off work) which has been very healing for us. It's 8 years today since the day we got together so we're just trying to appreciate that we have eachother and we've had a beautiful 8 years growing from boyfriend/girlfriend, fiances and now husband and wife. Next year hopefully we'll add mummy and daddy to that list!

    Might pop my head into the TTC after miscarriage thread. Will just have to work up a little courage.

  5. #585
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    I'm glad you like the George canyon song jazz

    I downloaded it from iTunes and it's in my car, I listen to it on the way home from work if I've made it through the day without having a breakdown. It's the alone time I give myself, I feel like I'm with my baby.

    I lost my little boy at 19.5 weeks, it'll be 4 weeks tomorrow.

    I hope he knows how much I miss him. Xo

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    I'm sure he knows how much you miss him woody and I bet he feels you loving him everyday. So sorry for your loss xxx

  7. #587
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    Quote Originally Posted by Woody1982 View Post
    I'm glad you like the George canyon song jazz

    I downloaded it from iTunes and it's in my car, I listen to it on the way home from work if I've made it through the day without having a breakdown. It's the alone time I give myself, I feel like I'm with my baby.

    I lost my little boy at 19.5 weeks, it'll be 4 weeks tomorrow.

    I hope he knows how much I miss him. Xo
    Thanks for pointing that song out to me, I now have yet another artist that I love. I am going to try to buy the album that the song is on. When I first heard the song I just sat there crying silent tears. My DH saw that I was crying but he was on the phone so had not heard the song, and couldn't work out why I was just suddenly crying. As soon as he got off the phone I played it for him to and he also shed a few tears. It is such and amazing song and lovely way to express such a sad time in our lives. I know that I still shed a tear or two when I listen to the song (which I do most days) but if I watch the clip it is just so much worse.

  8. #588
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    MrsHunidue is offline A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bank balance smaller, home happier, clothes dirty, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for.
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    well ladies looks as though im back again after a brief (an exciting) stint in the march due date threads, ive been cramping and started bleeding tonight (like a light period)... after being in hospital for most of the week with unexplained pain in my pelvis and finding a huge cyst on my ovary...

    if this is a miscarriage (which it feels like it is) it will be my 5th all up... being my second this year

    I think this will put an end to TTC for me and DH... too much heartache for me, him and our almost 7 year old son who unfortunately was there with me when i had a fall in may and started to bleed and miscarry... so he knows that a baby went to heaven... he took it pretty hard and today rubbed my belly asking this baby to stay alive for him and his baby sister to have a new friend... breaks my heart thinking that I will have to tell him that we have to say goodbye to another one.

  9. #589
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    So sorry to see some many new names in here. Hugs for your losses.

    Mrs hunidue big big hugs so sorry to hear. How many weeks are you? Are you going back to hospy? I hope there is a miracle and little bubs stays put.

  10. #590
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    Mrs Hunidue- so sorry you're back here. I want to tell you that some women bleed all the way through pregnancy and everything works out fine, but I suppose by now you know what a M/C feels like. I really hope Bubs can hang on in there for you and your son xxx

    Jazz- what's the other song that you found? I'm at the point where anything that helps me to grieve gives me a great release.


 

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