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  1. #411
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    It takes time and lots of tears but you will get past it. Give yourself time to grieve and be very kind to your body. Try not to shut Dh out cause he is hurting too.

    Many hugs to you and your Dh x x x

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    upsanddowns (19-05-2011)

  3. #412
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    Hi ladies
    Firstly I just want to say sorry for the loss of your babies

    I thought I'd pop in and say hi, I'm experiencing my first miscarriage at the mo. We know bub has died but because I'd rather things happened naturally, rather than go a d&c, which my OB is supportive of, I am just waiting for things to get underway. The cramping has begun but thats it so far.

    Alittle about me; DH & I decided it was time to bite the bullet & start a family. 6 mths later I was pregnant, we were exstatic! Sadly 7mths into the pregnancy our son passed away without much warning, and I went on to give birth to him the following day. Almost a year later we managed to get lucky again and were expecting our rainbow baby. But things weren't looking great, and our bub didnt pull through.
    So in the space of 13 days we have discovered the loss of our 2nd child, and now face the first anniversary of our son's passing.

    We hope to TTC as soon as we can. I am considered a high risk patient after the stillbirth of our son, and this entails quite a lot of meds and monitoring while pregnant.

    I wish you all brighter days ahead... and I can guarantee, it does get easier to live with the pain. You will never forget or get over it, but you will learn to continue on with it as part of you.

  4. #413
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    Hi All,

    Thought i would drop in as i am having a bad few days. I have my 6 week post D&C check up tomorrow morning with my OB. I am feeling a bit uneasy about it!

    I am just over it all at the moment, i just want my body to go back to normal so we can start to try again! I really didnt think it would take this long to stop the bleeding.

    I am also finding it hard with a friend having a baby a week ago and my sister (who i am distant with) is also due in a few weeks and my mum keeps on bringing up bits and pieces about her pregnancy and what her birth plans are. It is getting frustrating! I am guessing everyone else has been through the same??

    Sorry to go on, but i am just a bit down in the dumps and want to move on and get a sticky bub!

    I just keep thinking of where i would be now, how i would be feeling, how big i would be....I should have been 16 weeks!

    Anyway should run and get my mind off it!

    Hope you are all taking care and big hugs for all the new ladies that have unfortuantly made your way here!

  5. #414
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    Mind if I join? I am experiencing a miscarriage today and they think it was ectopic because I have bleeding outside the uterus. Has anyone else experienced this?
    Doctor thinks the sac has burst so I just have to go home and have bed rest.
    Worst bit is my hubby is in China so I just feel so lonely. I have my parents here and they are helping with DD but I really wish my DH was home.
    Feeling very sad

  6. #415
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    Could I join aswell please. Currently misscarrying, seems like it's going to be a long poccess as bleeding is increasing but at a slow rate. This is my first m/c and would have been baby no1 for us. . I have a scan in another 9 days to confirm and work out if I will need a D&C.

    Is anyone else feeling confused about TTC again? DH and I want to start a family so so much but the thought of jumping straight back into the whole scary first trimester thing is freaking me out. On the other hand I don't want to put it off if TTC is going to take many months. I really hope to be pregnant again by my EDD.

    Upsanddowns - I hope your bleeding stops soon so you can starting TTC again.
    I know how you feel with thinking of where you should be in your pregnancy by now. I'm already dreading my EDD, it will be such a hard day.

    Mummylip - I remember you from the TTC threads, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. How horrible is the 'wait', just sitting around resting, I'm going insane and it's only been 2 days since I started spotting. It must be hard with DH o/s, it's good to hear you have your family close but I understand it just isn't quiet the same no matter how close you are to your parents. DH is working alot which I'm finding hard enough, I'm lucky like you to have my parents close so I have someone to chat to.

    If anyone here wants to PM me if they find chatting helps feel free.

  7. #416
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    MrsHunidue is offline A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bank balance smaller, home happier, clothes dirty, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for.
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    Im joining your group also - there seems to be so many of us from the january thread heading here.
    This is my 4th miscarriage - still bleeding. I slipped and fell flat on my back on the concrete floor thursday night and started bleeding and cramping friday morning.

    Quote Originally Posted by Autumnlove View Post
    Could I join aswell please. Currently misscarrying, seems like it's going to be a long poccess as bleeding is increasing but at a slow rate. This is my first m/c and would have been baby no1 for us. . I have a scan in another 9 days to confirm and work out if I will need a D&C.

    Is anyone else feeling confused about TTC again? DH and I want to start a family so so much but the thought of jumping straight back into the whole scary first trimester thing is freaking me out. On the other hand I don't want to put it off if TTC is going to take many months. I really hope to be pregnant again by my EDD.

    Upsanddowns - I hope your bleeding stops soon so you can starting TTC again.
    I know how you feel with thinking of where you should be in your pregnancy by now. I'm already dreading my EDD, it will be such a hard day.

    Mummylip - I remember you from the TTC threads, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. How horrible is the 'wait', just sitting around resting, I'm going insane and it's only been 2 days since I started spotting. It must be hard with DH o/s, it's good to hear you have your family close but I understand it just isn't quiet the same no matter how close you are to your parents. DH is working alot which I'm finding hard enough, I'm lucky like you to have my parents close so I have someone to chat to.

    If anyone here wants to PM me if they find chatting helps feel free.
    Im so sorry this is happening to you also, you have been so supportive through my troubles and it breaks my heart that such a loving person is also suffering. xoxo I really hope the process isnt too long for you and that you have time to heal. This is my 4th miscarriage, and its never any easier, but what I have learnt from my passed mc's is that its just so hard and something that only you will ever truly feel the impact of.
    The most important thing is to rest, look after yourself, and cry if you need to cry. xoxo

    Partners Coping With MC My DH doesnt quite understand why I am so hurt by the MC as he sees it as not being a baby so I explained it to him that as a mother - carrying the baby and losing it feels much the way DH would feel if we were to lose a baby the day after it was born. I think he understands a little more now.

    On the TTC I am not sure also. Hubby asked yesterday if I wanted to start trying once the bleeding stops and i got angry at him (as it was only yesterday that I started to MC) but now I think that maybe i will. Im not sure, I think I need to get my head around losing our little bumble bee first....

    I guess after having 4 mc now Im worried that I may just have another mc again..


    MummyLip I am so sorry for your loss


    I have just been trying to keep myself distracted...

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    Autumnlove (30-05-2011),MummyLip (29-05-2011),upsanddowns (30-05-2011)

  9. #417
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    MummyLip, AutumnLove & MrsHunidue, I am sorry for your miscarriages.
    An update as to where I am at, I think today should be the last day of spotting after loosing my bub.
    It took just over two weeks from knowing bub hadn't made it (by u/s) for the bleeding to fully get underway, I passed my bub's sac 4 days into it, and bled for a week and a half all up. The pain was worse before passing bub, but I'm just glad its nearly over.
    We've been advised to wait for one normal AF now before we TTC. I have no idea when to expect the first O, the one to avoid, or AF for that matter, I guess time will tell.

    I hope you all get through this ok, likewise I am happy to chat to anyone who needs to vent, I've experienced my fair share of variety in baby loss now so can understand what you are going through. Go gently, take time to heal.

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  11. #418
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    Shortiii is offline Baby H v2.0 - Anticipating April release
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    Hi ladies,

    I thought I would post in here with the rest of you. I am so sorry for everyones losses.

    MrsHunidue - My DH is the same. It is not a loss to him. We never saw an u/s until after the baby had died, it just was never there to him. It makes it hard for me to grieve our baby, when he can't understand, but at the same time, I know I can't make him feel how I do.

    PA80
    - I think we were in the December group together? This is not the chat thread I would ever have thought we would be joining. We lost our babies around the same time. Our bub was around 8w5d. I am sorry for your loss, and sounds like the last few weeks have been horrible. We too will be TTC after my first AF. I am not sure when all that will happen... we may be in another due in group together yet.

    Autumnlove - I am pretty confused about the whole TTC thing also. I am already dreading it, as TTC this bub wasnt fun for us. It was a whole lot of scheduling around work and toddler, and anxious over tests and dates. I am hoping we can try and be a bit more relaxed this time.. Whenever that will be??

    MummyLip - I am sorry for your loss. I hope you are getting plenty of rest. and you can get as much support from your DH as you can despite him being away

    AFM - You may have read my thread (which posted twice!?) Only noticed later, silly mobile BH. We found out last Monday that our baby had died around 8w5d and they automatically booked me in for a D&C. It has been one of the most traumatising horrible experiences of my life, I didn't know I had the option to miscarry on my own - I had already started bleeding - They told me I didnt have a choice but go ahead with surgery I have been in pain and on medications for the last week after they stuffed up the surgery and I had a bit of an infection.
    I am sad about our beautiful baby and miss them so much. I have ordered a memorial necklace with the babys name and will be able to wear it close to my heart.
    I want to TTC right away again. The hospital gyno said to wait 3 cycles. Otherwise the chance of another m/c is higher. However I thought we could wait for my first AF then try again? I havent read anything that says the m/c rate is higher
    I am more nervous about how long it might take us to conceive and having another D&C more than losing another baby. But my feeling change alot. Right now I am taking it one day at a time. Although it feels like all the things I was looking forward to are gone and I feel awfully depressed.

    I hope a bit of time, and eventually the excitement of a new baby will help heal some of the wounds.

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  13. #419
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    MrsHunidue is offline A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bank balance smaller, home happier, clothes dirty, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for.
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    I cant sleep.. its 3am.... the panadol wore off and the cramps have kicked in but its only 2 1/2 hours since i took it so i cant take any more

    Really wish i could stop thinking. I just woke from a dream of me sitting in the lounge rubbing my big pregnant belly with my two other children, Was such a real dream, then I woke and realised it isnt going to happen. . . . . . .

  14. #420
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    Hello lovely ladies, thanks for your support. So sick of being at home but too weak to be anywhere else. The bleeding is just a constant reminder of the loss and the fact I am not going to be a mummy again. I guess you never understand miscarriage until it happens to you. Last night I rang SANDS to speak to a phone counsellor I just felt I needed to speak to someone and with DH being in China I feel so alone. The counsellor was lovely and they are sending me out some info and invited me to a support group. I highly reccommend speaking to them if you need it girls.

    Mrs Hunidue so sorry to see you in here from January. It must be so difficult especially seeing as it's your fourth miscarriage. It just isn't fair! How are you feeling today? It is so difficult to think about trying again. I want to be pregnant again so badly especially before the angel's due date but I am terrified of going through this again. I wouldn't wish this pain on anyone. The Obs at the hospital told me to wait for two periods so in my case that could be 3 months not sure I want to wait that long. Maybe I will wait until after my next AF. I really wanted to have my 2 kids close in age.

    Shortiii so sorry for your loss and sorry you had to go through a D&C which sounds horrible. How is you DH taking it? Is he supportive? The necklace sounds like a lovely idea. I also feel like I will be down until I get the excitement of another baby. The things you look forward to the nursery, the baby, first cuddles, buying clothes are all just taken away and you're left with nothing. It's no wonder you feel depressed.

    PA80 so sorry to hear of your loss. How far along were you? After a still birth too, I am so sorry Life is not fair.

    Autumn love sorry for your loss. It hurts so bad. It is hard when DH's are working all the time. DH is trying to get an earlier flight and may be back Tuesday morning which seems like an eternity away. I feel like I can't grieve until he comes back. My DH is sad too and he has no support over in China he really wanted this baby too.

    Upsanddowns it is really hard having friends and family pregnant around you. I also have lots of friends around me UTD. I feel jealous of their bumps and sad that I won't have my own baby bump and then I feel guilty for feeling like this. I hope your check up goes well.

    DaddynMummybee I hope your pain goes away soon. It feels like we're going to hurt for eternity. I hope it's not that long.

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