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    Eco Goddess's Avatar
    Eco Goddess is offline Loving life under the Bodhi tree!
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    I have definitely thought about it. DP and I have been together for almost 8 years and although I would love to get married (and he says he does!) its just not our priority. I have contemplated changing my last name before we have a baby. I work with a lot of children and families where they have multiple last names and it can get quite confusing. Also my MIL has been married in 3 long term defacto relationships, each one having a son...so she has a different last name to her kids and they all have different last names to each other!

    I really think it is a personal decision though!

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    Quote Originally Posted by MikeM View Post
    I kept my name, and so did my wife. I really wouldn't have liked the idea of her taking my name, because of the history of women as chattel. Luckily, she felt the same way so it was fine, plus it would have been a bother for her to have to change her name as she has a successful professional identity, plus all the paperwork. We are married, and didn't really think about it until then, but if it had come up I would have felt the same way in a defacto relationship.

    We are just starting to have discussions about our future child's name.
    Hyphenation is an option, but with both our names it is a bit long. I'm happy for our child to have her surname, so that is another option, and we have tentatively discussed making a new one out of both of ours, or just making one up.

    Queensland Premier Anna Bligh and her husband gave their children a made up surname, "Frances". I think it is her mother or grandmothers name? Which is a nice idea, and a good way to honour a family connection.

    Ultimately though, I don't think having a common name is what makes a family, it's the connection between you all. I still feel the same way about my sister, even though we no longer share a name.

    Cheers,

    Mike
    I have kept my own name for the above reasons.


 

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