+ Reply to Thread
Results 1 to 4 of 4
  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    2,499
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked
    12
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts

    Unhappy any first time single mum's???

    hey,
    I guess I need some advice from any first time single mums out there, who have done it solo & were scared as hell, just like me...
    Ive recently broken up with the father of my my unborn baby (well we were'nt really a copule to begin with, we were just seeing each other & I fell pregnant)
    dont get me wrong, he is being amazing & supportive towards the baby, but I just dont have feelings towards him, he seems pretty devistated that i dont want to play big happy families and pretend everything is all fairytale like..
    Dont get me wrong, I would much prefer it all worked out & we were a happy couple, but I just dont feel it... I have tried to ignore everything that annoys me about him, but i just cant keep lying to him or myself... I broke up with him for the same reason a couple weeks before I found out I was pregnant for the same reason, I just didnt feel for him... then I found out i was pregnant, so I thought well this is the perfect time to try again & maybe I will feel different now that we are having a baby???
    but no, i cant handle him... he is being really good though but its just not there???
    I must sound so selfish
    I mean he is in total debt, cant hold a job, really unstable & im the TOTAL opposite & i just dont want that **** holding me back or bringing me down.. he has nearly everything against his name & once again I have all good records...
    I dont want this in my life & these things holding me back...
    Apart from that, he really means well & has a good heart & I know he will be a really loving & supportive father, i dont doubt that at all, I just dont think he can be the provider, I think it would be me sadly....
    He is totally devistated that I dont wanna be with him (not that I want to be a single mum by any means) he seems almost a lilttle obssessed with me and that turns me off even more... its really sweet that he is so into me & I should be over the moon about it, but I really dont feel the same towards him...
    I just happened to fall pregnant to him
    he is a good guy with a great heart and & will be an amazing father, just not the right partner for me... i cant fake it if its just not there...
    I am really happy & excited to become a mummy & nothing to me is more precious & important to me than this.... i just wish it happend a little differently thats all.... he wouldnt take no for an answer and he finally got the message (mind you I was being sooo nice about it) and now he wont even send me txt messages to see how im doing or anything, its like he is all depressed...
    I feel so bad and cant stop worrying about everything & what the hell Im going to do...
    **** happens i guess & you just gotta make the best out of what you've got right??
    im just really scared as to where im gonna live, what sort of an appartment i should rent (thats if any real estate wants to give a single pregnant lady a rental?) and how the hell Im gonna do this financially on my own...


    anyone else have advice or similar stories, I would love to hear from you

    thanks so much
    Renee xx

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    5,596
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked
    1
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I am a single mother, I have a 12 month old son and I am 18

    We have a young parents forum here at bubhub, check it out.

    http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/f...splay.php?f=44

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    2,499
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked
    12
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by neostudded View Post
    I am a single mother, I have a 12 month old son and I am 18

    We have a young parents forum here at bubhub, check it out.

    http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/f...splay.php?f=44



    thankyou soooo much hun, your a legend!
    hugs

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Posts
    11
    Thanks
    5
    Thanked
    4
    Reviews
    0
    Hi Renee

    Thanks for your post, it is kinda comforting in a strange way that I am not the only one out there with that kind of experience. I feel like I have just lived through what you did in 2008. It is pretty much exactly the same, except 'father' does have a job/$ etc. Like you, we were never together, so he didn't like it when I told him I didn't have any feelings for him, he was a nice person until then...of course! Then when I told him I was pregnant, and still didn't want to be with him, he became even worse. I tried to do the right thing and be friendly for the baby's sake, but the last time he contacted me, he said he does not want to have anything to do with a baby that comes out of me. You're so right, their desperation is such a turn-off, and in my case, his immaturity is sickening! It sounds so selfish, but for my sake I would be quite glad to never see him again. However, I'm a firm believer in not denying parents the opportunity to be a parent, but it's going to be hard to remain civil if he does change his mind. I think deep down he does want to be a father to this baby, just doing whatever he can to hurt me...

    I'm pretty resilient so am not overly worried about surviving emotionally/financially as a single parent, in terms of practical struggles of being a single mum, well I'm sure I'll get there, but dealing with an imbecile as the father of my baby. omg a totally different story!

    Anyway, just wanted to say thanks...unbelievable how your situation is similar to mine!

    Tina


 

Similar Threads

  1. Hi, any other 'mum's to be' out there that are single???
    By Tina 2013 in forum Single Parents
    Replies: 35
    Last Post: 24-11-2012, 21:13
  2. rude mum's at rhyme time
    By Hunkamunka in forum General Chat
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 05-09-2012, 13:11

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

FEATURED SUPPORTER
Glowing ExpectationsA one stop shop, 40 week, online pregnancy fitness and wellbeing program - recommended by Doctors. Convenient, ...