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  1. #21
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    Thanks heaps Roxy...

    Another question...

    you can approach the author and get to know them with the view to donating
    This quote... what would be a reason that people wouldn't donate to the recipients?

    I mean, obviously, if I saw an ad I was drawn to and wanted to help them by donating my eggs- then I would really try to do this.

    Do people pull out for superficial reasons like they want a 'better looking child'? Or is it more for reasons like the donor doesnt believe that the family would take the best care of the child... or that the donor and recipients dont get along? Or... more serious issues like finding out the donor has some kind of health issue that comes from a few generations back?

  2. #22
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    It depends on what kind of relationship you are looking for with your recipients.

    If you are looking at the type of relationship where you just exchange Christmas cards once a year, then "clicking" with the recipients on a personal level probably isn't that important.

    However, there are donors (like me!) who want to have a little bit more regular contact, so want to "click" with the person/people they are donating to.

    I didn't donate to the first couple I approached - something just didn't feel right and I just knew that they would not have ever told their children about their origins (something that I believe in), and I never would have heard from them without having to chase them.

    Recipients won't pull out because they think that they won't get beautiful children - what a donor's colouring/build/etc is usually isn't a great consideration. People who are looking for ED's have already run the gauntlet of IVF and failed, and they are so desperate to be parents that they are usually just greatful that someone will give them another chance at that.

    Hope that makes some sort of sense!

  3. #23
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    Awesome. Thanks so much for the information.

    I would definatly want to be kept informed on what is happening with the child I helped create. I would be happy with Photo's etc from birthdays & Christmas if thats all the recipients were comfortable with... but like you, I would probably like more contact.


    How do you go about telling people they arent right for you, if you just dont get that 'right' feeling?
    And how long do you usually take-getting to know them- before you go ahead with the donation?
    Last edited by xkwzit; 28-08-2007 at 20:55.

  4. #24
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    How do you know? It sounds silly, and until you've experienced it, you just scoff and roll youy eyes ... BUT, you do just know when you've met the people who are right for you...you have no doubts about donating to them - in fact you are excited that you can help them!

    A good friend of mine has just finally found her recipients - for months she has been telling me that the "click" that everyone talks about was just a figment of their imagination - until she felt it.

    When you meet them, and they are "the ones", you will know.

    How long depends on you and your recipients, and the way in which you meet them. I met my recipients on a donor/recipients website (please let me know if you want the details), so we already kind of knew each other before I offered to donate to them. I "knew" my recipients for about 6mths (through chatting on that forum) before we starting talking in earnest, and we were cycling within 10 weeks of that!

    The friend I mentioned above has just started cycling last night, and she met her recipients about a month ago. (She met them through her clinic, and had already done all the prelim stuff).

    It can take a very short time, or a long time..it really depends on so many varying factors.

  5. #25
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    I would love the website Roxy! Thanks

    Is being a donor a time consuming process?

    How many visits on average to the clinic need to be taken?

    Gosh, I want to donate so much- but I guess there is so much research to be done first!

  6. #26
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    Being a donor isn't that time consuming - the actual cycle takes about 6weeks from the time you start on the down-reg regime. It can take about 4-6 weeks to get to that point, between specialist appts and counselling....

    I only visited the clinic once - at the very beginning.

    And yep - do your research. Make sure that your heart will "let" you go ahead with donation.

  7. #27
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    Hi Mokar,

    Roxy has given you some very sound advice. It is true that if you are looking to have a relationship with your recipients that there will be a "click".

    I was approached by a wonderful lady who offered to be our donor and although we got on well it just didn't feel right. I actually discussed with her the fact that I didn't want anyone to donate who wasn't 100% comfortable with myself and my partner and it was soon after that we parted ways. Although I was devastated at the time I knew it was the right thing for both her family and mine.

    The lady that has become our donor is the most wonderful person and we have developed a wonderful friendship with both her and her family - we speak regularly and it is like we have known each other forever. If you click on the link in my signature you will be able to read our joint story.

    I notice from your first post that you are still quite young and may have only just started your family. Most clinics will recommend that you finish you family first. Please do your research - you may even wish to contact a clinic in you local area for advice as there are some risks albeit minor.

    I wish you all the best - this is a generous gift that you are considering offering. I assume that you are aware of the ads posted by ladies seeking egg donors right here on Bubhub.

    Take care.
    Diana
    Last edited by xkwzit; 28-08-2007 at 20:56.

  8. #28
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    Hi kandd - Thanks for your reply. I have read through alot of the posts on BH and would just love to help every one of them- but as Roxy said- do my research! Which, I am ... Yes, I am young but I do not want anymore children, and so I figured that I should bless someone else with my eggs as they are just being 'wasted' so to speak.


    Thanks for PMing me the address Roxy- I will definatly check that site out.


  9. #29
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    Hi - I no this thread has probably closed, but I just wanted some info about all of this.
    I'm 20 - is that to young to donate?
    I dont want any more children, and if I did, and I couldn't because of donating, it wouldn't bother me much.
    But I was wondering how it all works properly. I have been on an injection for 3 years, and had my first period not long ago. Is there an injection that can kick start my period again so I can donate?
    Also, I'm from the UK (going back in November) is it to late to even think about it?
    Thanks

  10. #30
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    I also have some questions, hopefully wa mum of 4 will be on to help out!
    I'm 22 years old, DEFINATELY not having any more children and am considering donating...
    The thing is, I want to know all I can before saying I definately want to do it.
    I also kind of doubt that I'll be able to...
    I have PCOS you see... I had a missed m/c at 17 weeks (took 13months to concieve), and with my DS and DD I was pregnant within 2months off the pill. So I don't know what the go is in that area! My periods are irregular though.
    Also, I'm on the implant, is that an issue?
    I've talked to my DH about it, he says he doesn't agree with me even donating my blood, but he wouldn't stop me. Kind of the same thing here. Men...


 

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