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BFF 30th Birthday Party or DD2s Friend's 1st Birthday ~ WWYD???

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  • #16
    BFF 30th Birthday Party or DD2s Friend's 1st Birthday ~ WWYD???

    What time are the parties on? I would assume the first birthday would start and finish earlier? Could you turn up for half an hour on your way to your friends party maybe ?

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    • #17
      A child isn't going to remember not going to a first birthday party... your BF will never forget.

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      • #18
        Re: BFF 30th Birthday Party or DD2s Friend's 1st Birthday ~ WWYD???

        Originally posted by twotrunks View Post
        Go on your own to 30th and get duh to take kids bday - everyone wins!!
        this is what I would do

        Sent from my GT-I9100T using BubHub

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        • #19
          BFF 30th Birthday Party or DD2s Friend's 1st Birthday ~ WWYD???

          I'm going to go against the grain here and say I wouldn't go to the 30th. It's a 5 hour round trip and I would assume an overnight stay, at a venue that is unsuitable for children. You wouldn't get to talk to her much anyway as she would be socializing and you would be trying to keep your children entertained!

          I think your idea of spending time away with her together is a good one. You will actually get time together, rather than just "party time" where you can't chat all night or you'll be monoplisisng the birthday girl!

          My only other thoughts are to ask your DD's friends if she can stay there the night and you and your other kid/s go to the 30th. Or DH stays home with the kids and you go to the 30th alone.

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          • #20
            BFF 30th Birthday Party or DD2s Friend's 1st Birthday ~ WWYD???

            So OP, have you made a decision yet?

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            • #21
              BFF 30th Birthday Party or DD2s Friend's 1st Birthday ~ WWYD???

              If my BF didn't come to my 30th because she went to a 1st birthday instead I would be pretty peeved.

              We all love our kids but they are not the centre of the universe and I think other family members (i.e mum and dad) should take priority every now and then. And I am not sure why the fact your BF is single with a bio clock ticking makes any difference to this decision.

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              • #22
                The pub may have a playroom? A lot do these days

                I'd o to the 30th personally.

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                • #23
                  I would choose BFF's bday every day of the week. It wouldn't cross my mind not to go.

                  I would probably have dh take the kids to the kids' party, though.

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                  • #24
                    BFF 30th Birthday Party or DD2s Friend's 1st Birthday ~ WWYD???

                    Originally posted by goldencrumble View Post
                    If my BF didn't come to my 30th because she went to a 1st birthday instead I would be pretty peeved.

                    We all love our kids but they are not the centre of the universe and I think other family members (i.e mum and dad) should take priority every now and then. And I am not sure why the fact your BF is single with a bio clock ticking makes any difference to this decision.
                    Just for the record it doesn't, it was just back ground info! I don't recall stating that that had any impact on my decision?! Just found it a bit odd that she has said there will be more kids there than adults but no entertainment for them - now they are my children and they are my responsibility so I am totally fine with providing them with activities whilst there. Also it's a 5 hour round trip drive for a 2-3 hour party.

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                    • #25
                      BFF 30th Birthday Party or DD2s Friend's 1st Birthday ~ WWYD???

                      I agree with others - go to the 30th!

                      Sometimes for special events you need to just suck it up and put yourself out - that's what makes a good friend, one who is willing to put someone else ahead if themselves!

                      I honestly would ask your DH to stay home - you go and stay the night and celebrate with your friend!

                      Inappropriate venue, no babysitter, long car trip are all acceptable reasons for your DDs not to attend - not you!

                      I would very upset if my BFF didn't come to my 30th - especially if I had been overseas for a significant period of time leading up!

                      Strawberry festivals come every year - 30th Birthdays once!

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                      • #26
                        We're going and staying the night.

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                        • #27
                          BFF 30th Birthday Party or DD2s Friend's 1st Birthday ~ WWYD???

                          Originally posted by Californication View Post
                          I'm going to go against the grain here and say I wouldn't go to the 30th. It's a 5 hour round trip and I would assume an overnight stay, at a venue that is unsuitable for children. You wouldn't get to talk to her much anyway as she would be socializing and you would be trying to keep your children entertained!

                          I think your idea of spending time away with her together is a good one. You will actually get time together, rather than just "party time" where you can't chat all night or you'll be monoplisisng the birthday girl!

                          My only other thoughts are to ask your DD's friends if she can stay there the night and you and your other kid/s go to the 30th. Or DH stays home with the kids and you go to the 30th alone.
                          I agree, and although you've now made your decision you don't sound completely overwhelmed (tho I know it's hard to tell in text 😳). It's a very long way to go with 2 little ones, and if she is a BFF she will completely understand why you decide not to go. I'm sure she would appreciate you and her spending time together at a later date. Either way, enjoy!

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                          • #28
                            BFF 30th Birthday Party or DD2s Friend's 1st Birthday ~ WWYD???

                            Originally posted by Bellaleggos View Post
                            I agree, and although you've now made your decision you don't sound completely overwhelmed (tho I know it's hard to tell in text 😳). It's a very long way to go with 2 little ones, and if she is a BFF she will completely understand why you decide not to go. I'm sure she would appreciate you and her spending time together at a later date. Either way, enjoy!
                            It will definitely be an adventure! Still not entirely comfortable with it, as we do have two very young children, but this next year is all about us as a family so it's all of us or none of us.

                            Thank you!

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                            • #29
                              im gona go asgainst the grain and say id go the the first birthday.
                              I would however call my BFF and say how sorry you are and arrange to see her VERY soon. Call her on the day of her birthday and send a gift. Something really special like a singing clown or giant banner. How long until,this happens? Do you havw time to orgainse something special. I know its not the same but if shes a good friend, she'll understand. Sometimes you have to put YOUR family first!

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                              • #30
                                BFF 30th Birthday Party or DD2s Friend's 1st Birthday ~ WWYD???

                                Is this friend really a BFF? The reason why I ask is that it sounds like you really can't be stuffed going. That you're trying to come up with all these little justifications for not going. A real BFF would look at things from a different mindset "I'm going to the party, how can I make things more enjoyable for my child."

                                If you've drifted apart from your friend then that doesn't mean you are a bad person.
                                Last edited by VicPark; 02-09-2012, 10:54.

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