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How do u feel wen u first hold ur newborn child first child or fourth child

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  • How do u feel wen u first hold ur newborn child first child or fourth child

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  • #2
    Ok I'll start it off. When I held DD1 I felt like I couldnt get enough of her, like Oh my god, I just had a baby, a BABY OH MY GOD. With DD2 I still had the overwhelming feelings of love but, maybe cos she was prem and couldnt hold her till she was over a week old, I guess you could say I had/have a few attachment/connection problems, as horrible as that makes me sound. I never got to be the first one to feed her, change her first nappy, first one to see her or hold her etc.. I missed out on a lot of the very first things that happen. I struggled to breast feed her and emotionally connect to her as I did DD1. I'm not sure if its the circumstances of her birth or if its because you already have a child and the elation of becoming a first time parent has already passed IYKWIM? Sometimes I feel guilty of feeling this way yet I know it is probably quite normal.

    Dont know if that helps.

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    • #3
      Holding my Son for the first time was an incredible thing for me.
      My partner who had just endured near on 40 hours of labor held him first. But I held him just a few minutes later. I got a huge rush of adrenalin, Even though I'd been awake nearly two days straight I felt wide awake, the best way I can think to describe it was similar to falling in love with my partner.

      Shortly after I felt very strongly that I had to get my new family home. It was a weird thing, I guess it was instinctual, I felt as though I had to look after the family, and I couldn't do that in the hospital.. had to be back home. Was a huge relief two days later when we did finally get to go home.

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      • #4
        I know I am crashing the dads thread but those responses are really sweet. I wish I knew how DP felt about holding our daughter for the first time. He isn't good with expressing his feelings so I have no idea and have never been able to get it out of him.

        So I hope he had a similar response to you both

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        • #5
          when my daughter was born, I held her whilst wearing a jumper that was soft and snuggly, she held my finger and I was gone - she was just so beautiful and tiny. I got to give her a bath, and she looked at me with those beautiful eyes...

          when my sons were born, I was wearing the same jumper, it felt just the best way to welcome them both into the world. I got to hold one of my sons a bit longer as his brother took a few minutes to come into the world, 15 minutes that felt like an hour. I held him too, he was the smaller of the twins and he held my hand - his tiny fingers wrapped around my finger, and wouldn't let go. Every day since, they have all been a piece of joy in my life.

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          • #6
            With my first I was so happy excited and even thought wow why was I screaming in pain for? I feel fine! Anyways saw her and said my mum is going to kill me as I had a fast labour & also then thought I just finished work to start my new job as being a mum 8 hours after finishing work! After birth they had to take her to warm up for a few hours and I couldn't stand it, her being away from me...

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            • #7
              I know the experience is very different for women but I remember vast swathes of our first birth very vividly. Mostly I was just there to get DW what she wanted.

              Number one son liked it in there so much he wrapped the cord around his neck which made things very difficult for him and his Mum. Eventually a team of eight used the vontuse method to bring him into the world.

              It took 14 hours but my most vivid memory is looking down on my son at the end to see that his head was mishapen due to the vontuse. I looked down at him and then looked up with murder in my eyes!!! One of the midwives saw me and said no no no that is normal!!!!!

              After calming down I got a cuddle and mentioned that the next time they have a 6ft 120KG+ man in the delivery room it might not be a bad idea to give him a little warning

              Our other births were much easier on me as they were easier for my DW but each one was great and the beauty of binging a big bloke is I'm a very comfy option when it is time for a snuggle/sleep

              BBB

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              • #8
                From dh perspective. He was over the moon, very confident in himself it was like fatherhood came natural from him.

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