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Kids – it’s easier as they grow up! But it’s hard

Child riding bikeThere have been many stories written about how children grown up in the blink of an eye.

How if we look away, even for a minute, their darling little chubby baby cheeks will be taken over by their wide-eyed interest in the world.

But nothing could ever prepare me for my darling son’s fifth birthday. The realisation that my mornings are now so much easier, I don’t have to help brush teeth, physically get anyone dressed, and worry about constantly being asked for help with things.

But is this another instance of you don’t know what you’ve got till its gone?

For all those mornings I wish I had help just to ensure we were out the door on time – or even made it out the door at all. But now, I’m finding myself pinning for those days to come back, just once I would love to be needed, to hear his darling little voice echo through the hallway asking if I could help him turn on the tap, or whatever other small task that would frustrate me as I would need to stop what I was doing to help with.

Now, I’m longing for their return.

Truth is, I have been preparing myself for the big fifth birthday ever since his first birthday. I made a promise to myself I wouldn’t make too much of a fuss for his birthdays until he turned five. However this was only decided after I threw him a gigantic, elaborate first birthday, that he will never remember and I was rushing around stressed and didn’t even get a chance to enjoy it with him.

So I began planning, he would have some friends from daycare, some friends from preschool, some family friends, it would all be glorious and themed and totally Pinterest worthy.

I used this party as an excuse to ignore the sinking feeling in my gut that he was about to enter the next chapter, the school years.

The chapter that will stay with him until he is 18 and will see him through learning to tie his shoelaces, to all the extra sports he will try to see where his passion lies, even through to his first girlfriend and getting his license. All these momentous occasions will be bundled into this one chapter.

However it’s not all bad and although his voice may not forever be this little angelic ringing, I know he will never stop asking me for things. I just need to accept that instead of it being help turning on the tap, it will soon be asking for help with homework or to time his laps around the oval.

Really, it isn’t that those moments are gone, it’s that they are evolving, as we both are in this family journey.

Image credit: warrengoldswain/123RF Stock Photo

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2 comments so far -

  1. I don’t know if they still do it, but when my 2 nieces started school in SA in the late 1980s, during their first term they were taught that kids have rights. Parents basically weren’t allowed to yell at them – even if you didn’t swear at them – it was verbal abuse or emotional abuse. If they didn’t want to do what their parents asked them to do they didn’t have to. You couldn’t physically stop them from doing anything,e.g. going out. Everythings was “Kids have rights” The usual comment when kids go out and do something wrong is “where are the parents??” Remember – it is the kids that have rights. Remember they were told this at 5 years of age. Some kids are smarter than the teachers (and the Education Dept) give them credit for. Mum and Dad are adults, so are the Teachers. Some kids decided that if they didn’t have to do what their parents them to do, they didn’t have to for the teachers either. If a kid plays up too much at school you may get a visit from CAFS – Child and Family Services Officer asking a lot of questions and basically telling them how to care for their problem child, who has no family experience and is only saying what he/she has read in text books at Uni. Apparently the parents eventually told them to come back when they had some sensible solutions as they had already tried their suggestions without success — after in desperation asking the Officer if he/she want to take responsibilty for raising their child, including paying for her education, medical expenses etc. Long silence – then “no”. A friend of mine was there when the officer left and overheard part of the conversation from outside as the front door was open.

    • I won’t name the school as that principle may no longer be taught but it was one that is still Reception to year 12 and is a Public School

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