Amusing birth tales

[xkwzit]

We've had the funny kids stories, but I was wondering if people would like to share funny (or at least unexpected) things that happened immediately before, during or after birth.

For example, after DD1 was born, I was surprised at how embarrassed my OB was when he whipped into my room to see me trying to breast feed my newborn, tongue-tied, receding-chin baby. I could not imagine how, having delivered thousands of babies (and doing thousand more vaginal examinations) that a pair of breasts could freak him out

Similar tale for DD2 birth: OB (different guy) popped his head into my bathroom to check up on me. I don't know why he expected to find me decent in the bathroom . I was in the process of showering my stitches down below, but hey, having given birth tends to remove any false modesty you have about your body. So here I was happily showering and answering his questions while he tried to sheild his eyes from the lower half of his view of me (in all my post partum glory) with his hand (that STILL cracks me up).

And there was also the time that nurses nearly cleaned out my room (thinking it was empty, as I was in the bathroom). They had missed the sleeping newborn on the bed .

Any more amusments out there? (I'm sure this is just a little educational as well)

Cheers

[draught]

The stand out moment humorous moment from my first labour was the doctor asking for the TV to be turned off as it was distracting him - he was meant to be doing an episiotomy and using the vacuum and/or forceps to get my baby out, after 36 hours of labour, and was distracted by "The Addams Family" on cable TV!!!??? What concerned me in hindsight was that the TV was actually behind him, and the sound had been off for hours, so it did make me wonder why he was turning to watch it at that particular time !

[Jimmyjones]

Mine is with my first DD and that my waters broke in the shopping centre and when I tried to tell my husband he tried to give me a bottle of water as he thought I meant that I needed some water, and when he realised what had happened he freaked out and I felt really bad as he had just sat down to eat his lunch on a non-take away dish and when we got home before going to the hosp he was running around the house as all he wanted to do was brush his hair!!!!!!I had packed the hair brush

Cheers
Kate

PS: I also asked the doctor if he was using disposable stitches on me after the birth gee the things we say under gas......he loved reminding me at my check-up

[willsmum]

There I was sitting in bed in my PJ's breastfeeding at 11.30am. The cleaner was hovering outside my room for what seemed like ages. Then at 12.00 noon (the usual lunch time) no lunch turned up, they hadn't restocked my nappy supply, and no nurse had been near me for hours since my last pain killers and blood pressure check at 9.30am.

Next thing, the cleaner came in and asked what time I was actually planning on leaving cos she needed to clean the room and check-out was at 10.00am and it was now 12.30pm.

My answer: "er, I only had a c-section 2 days ago, so Tuesday next week I expect".

Turns out they put the wrong date on my admission form so the computer thought I had gone home and dropped me off all the lists, told them to clean the room out, not feed me etc.

Big apologies all around and they got the kitchen to make me a special lunch.

wow willsmum. which hospital did u go to that they supplied your nappies? (my middies couldn't emphasise strongly enough how important it was to remember lots of nappies as they wouldn't supply any!!).

The funniest part during my labour i think was when, nearing transition, my DH said I sounded like Dori from Finding Nemo trying to do whale song!!! Thanks darling!

It was also funny when the middie said "only one more push and it will be all over", and I screamed "Are you sure? Are you absolutely sure?" and my mum said "I think she's done this before!". Thanks mum!

[willsmum]

Burnside War Memorial Hospital in Adelaide (private hospital). They supplied everything for the baby - nappies, sorbolene for bum-cleaning, even singlets and smocks for them to wear. Mind you I had my own baby clothes with me that I used straight away. I only had to bring things for myself (breast pads, maternity pads etc).

[cheeky boys mum]

I can laugh now but at the time....During a long labour at one point I was on the floor crouched over one of those exercise balls and my husband was lying on his side on the bed offering words of encouragement. The words got quieter and quieter and I looked up between labour pains to find him a sleep.

[WeThree]

this isnt my own funny story but the other night my mum, who is a midwife was helping a woman give birth and as she left the room she said 'when i come bacl i'll do a PV' when she came back the woman was in peals of laughter and her husband was begging her not to say anything. she told my mum that he had thought pv meant 'poke vagina!" which i suppose it does really

[shellbell]

embarassing moment #1 - pushing with my first baby, who was in a little bit of distress. There was 1 middie and 1 Ob in the room and i had my eyes closed as i was pushing. when the contraction was over, i opened my eyes and the room was full of people, including a cute, young pediatrician who was waiting in the corner in case bub needed help. Oh, did i mention i was lying on the bed with my legs in stirrups, in all my glory ??

moment #2 - not embarassing, just funny (looking back on it now, but not at the time). i was pushing again, this time on the floor with my middie on one side of me and DH on the other side of me. DH is a nurse and he and the middie were chatting away, discussing nursing stuff, seemingly oblivious to the fact that i was in just a wee bit of pain. NOT HAPPY JAN !!!

[Rell]

Duing transition with both my labours I declared "I can't do this I'm going home". Not realy ann option at that stage. The funniest moment would have to be when the very young pediatrician came to check my son before discharge. As he is taking off my sons nappy my little darling does a great big poo. The Dr looks at me a little bewildered then proceds to take the nappy away placing his pooey bottom on the nice clean sheets. After several attempts to wipe him I felt sorry for him and stepped in to help. When it came time to put the clothes back on he decide I might be better at it then him.