I attended a birth last week, and cannot seem to get this off my mind, so I thought I'd get it off my chest.
My lovely client had a baby boy by caesarean birth 4 years ago, and desperately wanted a VBAC this time. The hospital wanted her to have the baby by a certain day as her liver was failing, and the baby was in distress.
With acupuncture, walking and I think a bit of positive thought, we managed to bring her into natural labour. By the time we arrived at the hospital to have her waters broken, she was already 4cm dilated.
About 8 hours later, we were still walking and positioning, and she had reached 7cm. But on a further check at around 4 hours later, she had remained at 7cm and had cervical swelling. The baby's heart rate had dropped significantly, and tests were showing that her liver was not coping.
A decision was made that she was be having her baby immediately. I watched my client and her husband cry, and beg for more time.
To this the doctor responded (in a calm and loving manner)
"Honey in ten years time it won't matter how you had your baby"
This is still ringing in my ears, because I know it will matter for the rest of her life.
I wanted to grab the doctor and shake her!
My baby was born by emergency caesarean birth at 26 weeks, 7 years ago. I remember every detail leading up to my anaesthetic that knocked me out for my baby's birth, to the look on my husband's face when I apologised for him missing Aimee's arrival. I remember the breathing tube being ripped from my throat when I awoke from an induced coma 2 days later. I remember trying to stand up, but not being able to move. I don't think ten years will remove these memories.
I know that I am lucky to be alive, and to have my daughter. I am lucky that her brother was born safely, in a similar manner. But despite being "lucky" I have to remember the indignity that the hospital dished out, mixed with the knowledge that they gave me my life and my baby's life.
News Flash Doctors - Ten years does not fade the memory. The women you say this too believe what you say. If you can't think of anything else to say, don't say anything at all.