On saturday night I had my close friend's engagement party to attend which I was excited about as it meant I got to catch up with her as she now lives in Brisbane and the engagement party was held in Sydney but the thing is her fiance is my ex's cousin.
I had spoken to the ex earlier in the week to see if he wanted to meet somewhere in the arvo so he could spend time with the kids before we went to the party as he had decided he wouldnt go (more like he was to gutless to go). Anyway he never answered my question about seeing the kids just started questioning why I had changed my mind and was now going. He then turned around and said well if its ok with you I will go to the party and spend some time with the kids and then leave. I said fine.
On my way down to sydney on saturday I get a phone call saying that there has been a change of plans someone has smashed the doors in at work so he has to go in and stay there till they are fixed. He must think i am completely stupid. The doors at his work are that thick a 4WD or truck would have to smash through them and not only that who is going to smash glass doors in during the middle of the day in broad daylight on a busy street in the Sydney CBD. He didnt even ask how the kids were just said can you tell my cousin and let him know he can ring me but i probably wont answer cause i will be busy. I told him that if he wanted to see the kids on sunday that we would be in sydney till after lunch. I never heard a word from him.
I thought I had gotten passed all the hurt and anger and would have been ok being around the ex's family until I got there. His aunty (my friends' future MIL) came up to me as soon as I walked in the door and gave me a big hug and asked how I was and I just broke down and had to go outside. Out of 20 people from the ex's side of the family only his cousin who is engaged to my friend, his parents & his brother and his GF. The other completed ignored me. I even had one of his cousins actually stand next to me outside and after a few moments I said hello and she said "oh i didnt realise it was you" and walked off inside and never came back outside all night or near me for that matter. So 3/4 of the night I felt like I didnt belong and like i was just lost. Once all the ex's side of the family left i was alot more relaxed and enjoyed myself. But the night also bought back all the hate, hurt and anger back that I thought I had dealt with.
And then today....well today would have been our 2nd wedding anniversary. I was emotional enough as it was this morning and then he had the hide to ring me at work and ask me if I knew what today was. I said yes I do but im really busy now and hung up on him. Who does that? Who rings their ex to remind them it would have been their 2nd wedding anniversary today.
I was going to go the gym tonight but I just feel so down today and emotional. I just want to go home and have a big cry and then cuddle up on the lounge with my 2 beautiful children.
Sorry its so long but i just needed someone to talk to and all my friends are at work and Bub Hub is always there for me day and night when I need someone to talk to.