What would you do???In two minds...

**Veritas** · 27-01-2007 13:00

Ok, so I've made the decision to return to a sport I played a few years ago in an effort to do something just for me.... the catch is that my ex also plays for the same club....

My ex made the decision not to have anything to do with bub, and has not even met her... he has even "prevented" his family from getting to know her.... returning to the club means that I will definitely have to see him and his family, which brings a certain level of awkwardness.... he is too gutless for there to be any level of confrontation at least....

I am in two minds as to whether to just show up, do my thing and let him work it out, or whether I should let him know I will be playing to help us both to avoid the awkward situation....

What would you do??

**kirstenriley** · 27-01-2007 13:01

To be honest, i would probably go play for another club??

**Dadandtwo** · 27-01-2007 13:12

You don't say whether you actually get on OK with the ex's family or not, or at least did before you broke up (or whether you actually would like for them to see the bub?). Or whether or not there's another club close by. But from I read so far, I would still play with the club. You've got to live your life.

**Veritas** · 27-01-2007 13:21

D & 2 - I didn't get along with them too well prior to our break up and they weren't too happy to start with about bubba... I have since sent them cards and letters to clear the air and things are a definitely better... his sister painted a picture of me that was far from the truth which is why things were sour to begin with.... I would love for them to be involved in bubs life, and have been trying very hard to make it happen without pushing too hard IYKWIM!

Kirsten - My sister and friends play for this club, and I previously played for them for 5 yrs.... its like a family to me... very social sport.... so another club is not an option... besides the fact as D&2 said, its my life and I'm not going to let him dictate what I can and can't do....

Basically is it courtesy for me to give him a heads up, or should I not worry???? I daresay he will hear on the ever reliable grape vine anyway... lol

**lovingmotheract** · 27-01-2007 13:26

just show up, do your thing and let him work it out after all you are a grown woman and you don't have to tell him a thing

**Kassiasmum** · 27-01-2007 13:26

I wouldn't let him know, he doesn't deserve the courtesy with the way he has treated you and bubs.

**Dadandtwo** · 27-01-2007 13:30

Yes, agree. No need to let him/them know you're turning up. I certainly wouldn't if it were me.

**Pobblebonk** · 27-01-2007 13:34

If it were me, I'd go play at the club and not even acknowledge his existence. It's just as much YOUR club as his and why should you change any aspect of your life to accomodate his?

Anyway, it might be good for your ex's family to 'bump' into bubba, it might make them realise what they're missing out on.