So, first of all... Im not sure if this warrants calling Child Welfare... although I am worried about my 3yr old nephew.
My BIL & SIL split about 6 months ago... and I have know about a few of these things for a while now but at a family gathering on the weekend, I was really shocked to see what was happening... right in front of my own eyes!!
Ok, so Nephew lives with his mother. However, she hardley sees him at all. She is always palming him off to other family members. (Im suprised he knows she is his mother..) She has recently got a new boyfriend which means she sees him even less... leaving him with who ever will take him. She will say "I will be 5hrs" and ends up comming back about 12hrs later. And she always seems to have her phone turned off when the people who are watching my nephew try to call her. (She has done this to me a few times)
Now, when she drops him at other peoples houses- she brings him with the clothes he has on his back and the nappy on his bum and thats it. (He is 3yrs old and still hasnt been toilet trained) She leaves him without any toys, clothes or nappies and takes off for hours... sometimes even a day or so at a time.
When she brings him to my BIL's house, she does the same thing.... BIL doesnt buy him any nappies or toys etc... so he is left in what he has. MIL is so sick of this that she has been buying him toys, clothes & nappies but when SIL comes to pick nephew up- everything goes home with her NEVER to be seen again.Also, when nephew is at BIL's house, if he make so much as a small whimpering noise (yes, he has a very limited vocab... probably as good as a 1.5yr olds), he is sent to his "room", which is just a room with a bed in it until he is completely quiet and then he is allowed outy. BIL believes the whole 'tough love' thing works.
The problem isnt only with SIL... BIL doesnt seem to want nephew around either... he will call saying he is 'comming around to visit and is bringing nephew with him'... and then turns up and within 5 mins, he has bailed and left the kid there without even asking if anyone can watch him.
They dont change his nappies (except for when he poos), and the child has been known to soak through his nappies all the time (as you would expect with him being 3 yrs old!).
The poor kid... fits into size 0's!! Thats the size my 4.5month old is currently in!! (except he is very tall for his age... just EXTREMELY SKINNY)... We are all just so sad at how this poor child is being treated. He was looked after so well when BIL and SIL were together.
BIL was saying to me yesterday that he was planning on doing all these courses... which are during the day on the weekends... I asked my other SIL what he would be doing with nephew and she rolled her eyes and said "exactly what he always does"- which is dump nephew on whoever.
SIL has been trying to get BIL to sign papers so she could move to Brisbane with Nephew.... but we just found out shes actually planning on taking nephew to NZ and living there. She has some relatives there- which means that nephew would be dumped on them while SIL did what she wanted.
Now I know that they are trying to establish new lives without each other.... but they have to acknowledge that they are this child's PARENTS. If I was a single parent, my CHILD would be my top priority! Not getting laid! And they are 5yrs older than me!!
I dont know if this warrants getting called into Child welfare... and I dont know if I could do it.... My DF doesnt think BIL is doing anything wrong. And Im pretty sure, if they found out it was me that called them in, Id be disowned from the family...
I dont know what to do. BIL & SIL dont listen to us telling them to shape up... But I am seriously concerned for the health & welfare of my nephew. I can already see how unhappy he is... I cant even imagine what he will be like as a teen if he stays in these environments!