I'm a bit obsessed with a tidy house as well, I get really anxious if it's too bad. We have a cleaner that usually comes once a week or every other week. If she hasn't been for a week I'll usually vacuum in between as I can't cope with the floors being messy and feel much better with them clean, everything else I'm ok with leaving for her. DH has always helped out a bit (always does dishes or puts them away and anything else if I ask) but since ds2 was born he has stepped up a lot (folding and putting away laundry, hanging up the wet stuff, cleans the kitchen every night, etc without me asking). We stay on top of dishes, what can't go in the dishwasher is usually washed immediately so it doesn't build up. Toys put away at naptime and bedtime by ds1, myself or DH. I have a shower at night to relax once everyone is asleep and a quick one in the morning before DH goes to work so I can at least feel slightly human. Dinner is usually some sort of fast ready meal, something easy like salmon and baked potatoes, or leftovers. I will often make some sort of big casserole dish or sauce on the weekends that can be frozen for meals for ds or eaten as leftovers for DH and I, then all I usually have to do is boil pasta and heat something up. So pretty much a cleaner and a lot of stuff turning into a team effort. Although the sleep situation here is still awful it's gradually getting easier as ds2 is getting more independent with his play, trying to move around so will scoot to a toy he wants, etc.