**please don't quote as I will delete post later***
So a bit of back story... It's just me and my mum... I'm an only child and my parents divorced years ago and I'm estranged from my dad. Dh still has both his parents and has 2 sisters and one sister has 3 kids.
My sons birthday is next month and I am having a bit of a party in the park for family and friends. I was talking to my mum and mentioned I might have a dinner on his actual birthday (the week prior) but I will sort the details closer to the date and it will be very informal as it is a school night.
Mum proceeded to say she's like to have it at her house which I said would be nice but she proceeded to say she would only invite DH's parents... I said thanks but no thanks as I would like to invite DH's two sisters and 3 kids.
So of course this has started a fight, with my claiming it makes it too hard with everyone and sometimes my SIL has a party for her kids and doesn't invite her (which is true but they would never not invite my family to a party to do with the kids) but she always has to accomodate them.
I've told her I don't feel comfortable having a party for DS and not inviting them but if she would prefer to have a grandparent only dinner maybe hold one closer to Christmas and have it as an end of year get together..but she doesn't like that either and is accusing me of always doing what inlaws want me to do not what she wants...
So am I unreasonable? I know I can't decide who is invited to her house and am not trying to but I don't want my ds's birthday night to be excluding family who I would have invited and I believe could potentially be offended... I would rather have it myself in that case...