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  1. #11
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    Default Sleep deprivation be gone!!

    Quote Originally Posted by BB77 View Post
    . Do you think patting until he falls asleep (even if it is takes agggges) with him crying is better than just leaving him to it? And he'll get the idea eventually?Cos at this point he doesn't even know that the cot is for sleeping.
    .
    Yes I think patting to sleep would be better as long as you slowly try and stop patting when bub is drowsy but not asleep.

    Alternatively This is the shush pat/ technique I used:
    - put your hand on bubs tummy. Pat the mattress above bubs head. Shush.
    - after a few minutes take your hand off bubs chest. Continue patting the mattress and shushing.
    - after a few minutes stop patting the mattress. Keep shushing.
    - After a few minutes edge towards the door. Keep shushing.
    - stop shushing ***before bub falls asleep*** and walk out.
    - if at any time bub cracks up add the previous step back in (eg patting mattress) and continue.

  2. The Following User Says Thank You to VicPark For This Useful Post:

    BB77  (22-10-2016)

  3. #12
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    Is bub ready to eat more? Upping meat/protein (to 1/3 of every meal) and upping carb could help with any hunger.

  4. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by BB77 View Post
    @misstrouble your poor dd, that sounds awful! I reckon even my clinger could make it past 90 seconds, not by much though.
    How'd you get her down to only one night waking? Just by tweaking her routine? Or did you have to stop feeding her every time she woke?
    Just by taking the focus of getting her to nap for the amount of time all the general "guidelines" out there say and pushing her to the point where she has built up enough sleep pressure to sleep soundly. No resettling if she has a short nap. And definitely not trying to get her to sleep when "tired signs" appear - just because there's some signs doesn't mean she's completely ready. I won't lie, days can be challenging as she doesn't nap well in the afternoon, but nights are pretty good (even slept through a few times) and there has been no crying or refusing to feed.

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    BB77  (22-10-2016)

  6. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    Yes I think patting to sleep would be better as long as you slowly try and stop patting when bub is drowsy but not asleep.

    Alternatively This is the shush pat/ technique I used:
    - put your hand on bubs tummy. Pat the mattress above bubs head. Shush.
    - after a few minutes take your hand off bubs chest. Continue patting the mattress and shushing.
    - after a few minutes stop patting the mattress. Keep shushing.
    - After a few minutes edge towards the door. Keep shushing.
    - stop shushing ***before bub falls asleep*** and walk out.
    - if at any time bub cracks up add the previous step back in (eg patting mattress) and continue.
    We did the same with both my kids except we didn't pat the mattress, that just distracted them, but I did rub their tummies or backs and shushed. I did start though doing that until they were fully asleep. I also had white noise in the room too to block out the sounds happening in the rest of the house.

    I then after a few days (with DS and a month with DD) I would start the sneaking out of the room. DS cottoned on quicker than DD but we didn't give DD the chance to try and self settle as we found it worked doing it until she was asleep.

    The point is eventually Bub will get used to being put down without the old 'aid' and learn the new way.

    I would also offer a top up feed 20 minutes before naps and bed and make sure it's out in the lounge or somewhere with lots of light and noise and also ensure you follow the same routine before each sleep of say sleeping bag, book, song, cuddle and down in the cot and do this consistently too.

    Good luck!

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    BB77  (22-10-2016)

  8. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by A-Squared View Post
    The point is eventually Bub will get used to being put down without the old 'aid' and learn the new way
    Very much hoping this will happen without too much drama. I patted his bottom last night instead of feeding and he finally gave me a 3 hour stretch, which he hasn't done in months (I can't believe it's come to that - excited about a 3 hour block). Granted, it was still in bed, not cot, but baby steps.
    I think patting the mattress would p!ss him off, but same principle as bottom pat. Gonna try do it in the cot next week, god help me.

  9. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by BB77 View Post
    Very much hoping this will happen without too much drama. I patted his bottom last night instead of feeding and he finally gave me a 3 hour stretch, which he hasn't done in months (I can't believe it's come to that - excited about a 3 hour block). Granted, it was still in bed, not cot, but baby steps.
    I think patting the mattress would p!ss him off, but same principle as bottom pat. Gonna try do it in the cot next week, god help me.
    Sounds like a good plan. I went to see a child sleep psychologist about DS who was able to self settle at 14 months but was still feeding to get back to sleep twice (sometimes three times) a night.

    She explained it really well in that what the Bub wants you to do is what you've always done, and sleep training is about teaching them what they need to do, so in our case it was settling without feeding. He sure as heck wasn't happy with it, but it took just 1 night of cuddling him to calm him down to realise he wasn't getting fed at night anymore and he slept through without a feed ever since.

    We were lucky that he was ready for it as well, but she explained that even if Bub isn't 'ready' yet, they will learn the new way and it can get worse before it gets better (worse being more crying) but it's teaching Bub a new skill and their recommendation was to still be there for the Bub and not leaving them to cry alone (although I'm still an advocate of that if that's what will help the child) but it sounds like your DS is quite spirited and could do with a slower and more of a phasing out of 'bad' habits and phasing in of 'good' habits which sounds like you're doing a great job of.

    PS I say 'bad' and 'good' in relation to sleep training NOT in relationship to parenting / parenting abilities it baby behaviour.

  10. #17
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    I want to settle instead of feed overnight but I do not have a clue where to start

  11. #18
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    Thanks @A-Squared that's exactly what I needed to hear. And what the psychologist said is really interesting. I guess I just need to know that it's doable without driving me completely mad. I've been envisioning weeks of me being kept up at night with a crying baby while I 'gently' try to settle him back to sleep. Not good when my sleep debt is already enormous and the sound of my dh doing something as simple as coughing in the car next to me makes me want to poke his eyes out (just happened now).

  12. #19
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    Can dh help? It's often easier for baby when they are asking for a feed to settle for someone doesn't smell like milk

  13. #20
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    This is the clinic. It's in Adelaide so you could possibly try a phone consultation with them

    http://www.sleepeducation.net.au/inf...ep%20facts.php

    These facts seem to ring true, it also talks about the need vs want I mentioned.

    If of course you want to use CC here's some info on that too: http://midwifecath.com.au/midwife-ca...sive-settling/


 

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