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  1. #91
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    Quote Originally Posted by Little Miss Sunshine View Post
    I felt guilt for NOT sending dd1 to childcare, I was worried I wasn't teaching her to "socialise".

    No matter what you feel guilty.
    Does she go to play group or swimming or anything? Plenty of socialization there. Even being with you while you catch up with friends or run errands is fine.

  2. #92
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    I know it's a bit off point, but I just want to jump on the point of kids who go through formal education and are massively failed by it...
    Main****** education, on the whole, drastically fails children who are lacking a stable homelife and adults who are invested in their education. I work with kids in out of home care, and the majority of teenagers I have worked with don't attend school. I have a 15 year old client at the moment who spends pretty much every day watching TV and playing video games. Far too many kids get to a point where all they get from school is a sense of failure and of adults mistrusting them and attempting to control them. For them, the logical choice is not to go.
    Our education system has some serious flaws, and whilst you may not rate them from your own perspective, there are legitimate reasons why some people choose to opt out entirely.

    Back to the OP....I think like most factors in a child's environment, there are potential positives and negatives. It's really about deciding what works for your family

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  4. #93
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gentoo View Post
    It's a little disturbing to read how much mummy guilt there is associated with sending kids to childcare - some of it internal guilt , and some of it projected onto mothers by others who don't agree with their choice to do so.

    And it makes me wonder - why doesn't there seem to be an equal amount of daddy guilt about children attending childcare? Do they feel the same levels of guilt but never articulate it? Or do they simply not feel guilty?

    Why is it that mothers feel (or are made to feel) like they should be looking after their children instead of sending them to daycare, when dads don't (or aren't made to) feel that way? Aren't they equally responsible for the care of their children?

    FWIW, my two children attend daycare 3 days a week, and I LOVE the days that they do. I'm working part-time and studying part-time at the moment, so those days are my opportunity to do those activities. But even if I wasn't working or studying, I'd still send them for a couple of days a week - partly so I could have an opportunity for some child-free time, and partly because I feel that daycare offers my kids great opportunities for socialising and learning that would be far harder to do at home. That being said, we're fortunate that our kids' daycare centre is excellent and the focus is on early learning, rather than merely babysitting. I also love that it is providing my children with something of an extended family (because we live a long way from our own).
    This is so true but same could be said for many many posts on here about parenting issues? How many dads contribute equally to housework even if they work the same hours as their partners? How many dads organise playmates, reply to birthday invitations, buy presents, read the school newsletters and gazillion notes? Ha ha I could go on for hours!

  5. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Freyamum For This Useful Post:

    A-Squared  (11-10-2016),binnielici  (11-10-2016)

  6. #94
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    Quote Originally Posted by Renn View Post
    I know it's a bit off point, but I just want to jump on the point of kids who go through formal education and are massively failed by it...
    Main****** education, on the whole, drastically fails children who are lacking a stable homelife and adults who are invested in their education. I work with kids in out of home care, and the majority of teenagers I have worked with don't attend school. I have a 15 year old client at the moment who spends pretty much every day watching TV and playing video games. Far too many kids get to a point where all they get from school is a sense of failure and of adults mistrusting them and attempting to control them. For them, the logical choice is not to go.
    Our education system has some serious flaws, and whilst you may not rate them from your own perspective, there are legitimate reasons why some people choose to opt out entirely.

    Back to the OP....I think like most factors in a child's environment, there are potential positives and negatives. It's really about deciding what works for your family
    Exactly right

  7. #95
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    Quote Originally Posted by Freyamum View Post
    This is so true but same could be said for many many posts on here about parenting issues? How many dads contribute equally to housework even if they work the same hours as their partners? How many dads organise playmates, reply to birthday invitations, buy presents, read the school newsletters and gazillion notes? Ha ha I could go on for hours!
    My partner does a lot of this.

  8. #96
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    I admit I'm not a fan of unschooling, and I struggle with understanding it's benefits and how it prepares a child for the real world, but when I ask questions I'm genuinely interested. Unschooling - can I ask why you chose to pull your kids out of school? What issues were they having?

    And since we are already talking about this. Unschooling4 obviously has that username bc she considers it important to her, she also actively chooses to comment on most educational threads we have. While I never condone nastiness, when you have a member known for unschooling who comes into a thread about childcare and says she doesn't want to institutionalise her kids by sending them - then get defensive at any replies - that's going to get a rise.

    It's like a known anti vax member, who comes into a vax thread saying she won't use that poison on her kids then gets upset when she gets a reaction.

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  10. #97
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    Children don't need to learn in very young age. I'd like to let them enjoy their childhood and make friends.

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  12. #98
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    Quote Originally Posted by Carbink View Post
    Children don't need to learn in very young age. I'd like to let them enjoy their childhood and make friends.
    I don't know, I think there are a lot of positives to come out of play based learning, which is what they do at daycare/kindy etc

  13. #99
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    I admit I'm not a fan of unschooling, and I struggle with understanding it's benefits and how it prepares a child for the real world, but when I ask questions I'm genuinely interested. Unschooling - can I ask why you chose to pull your kids out of school? What issues were they having?

    And since we are already talking about this. Unschooling4 obviously has that username bc she considers it important to her, she also actively chooses to comment on most educational threads we have. While I never condone nastiness, when you have a member known for unschooling who comes into a thread about childcare and says she doesn't want to institutionalise her kids by sending them - then get defensive at any replies - that's going to get a rise.

    It's like a known anti vax member, who comes into a vax thread saying she won't use that poison on her kids then gets upset when she gets a reaction.
    School is not the real world. Being stuck in a classroom with the same people, the same age as you and being forced to socialise with people you might not like, being forced to learn from a text book, asking permission to use the toilet. Ain't the real world.
    I removed my kids because of anxiety, behavior issues, bullying but i also removed them for a better life. So they can lead their own learning and education. So they are well rested and not stressed. I removed them for more family time.

    The OP asked what people thought about daycare. I answered.

  14. #100
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    Quote Originally Posted by Anjalee View Post
    I don't know, I think there are a lot of positives to come out of play based learning, which is what they do at daycare/kindy etc
    Play based learning doesn't have to just happened at daycare or kindergarten though.


 

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