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  1. #51
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    I think a wash out for school holidays yes but nothing else for that age

  2. #52
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaybaby View Post
    Once again...I think we are living parallel lives haha!

    What are her friends like? I like my DDs friends and I've made an effort to get to know them, I invite them window shopping with us, for sleepovers and just to hang out on the weekend. In some ways I am "friends" with my DDS friends while still being a parent. Some of DDS friends call me their 2nd mum ☺. I think developing that relationship helps me trust that they will do the right thing when they go to the shops on their own (I have the same rules as you...)

    My DD is quite obsessed with nails she buys those cheap glue-on nails from Kmart and plays around with them and nail polish all the time. She also recently had Shellac nails done while we're in Bali...but acrylics have been a no so far (except for her graduation...).

    It's quite funny having a girl so into this stuff as I'm not into nail/hair etc at all. But she enjoys it, and that's ok by me.
    Her friends are a mixed bunch. Most are lovely and respectful. Usually if they are getting up to no good it's in a group. DD is not a perfect angel and I don't blame her friends for any of her behaviour.
    Generally though she is a great kid. But hey teenagers will be teenagers.

  3. #53
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    My dd1 is nearly 12 and l'm dreading puberty but going to try and be reasonably fair with my girls. I've already told them l'm taking them to get their eyebrows done just before they start high school, maybe when they hit 13 or 14 a bit later on. No way am l letting them go through high school with a monobrow like l did. My mum didn't prepare me for puberty so l'm going to play it different. I love when l go to the hairdressers, when my girls are 13, l think a couple of foils would be fine. I will go with them.

  4. #54
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    Quote Originally Posted by Janesmum123 View Post
    Yes I have taken her to our GP. We have tried many creams, lotions, washes. She is using a medicated face wash now which helps dry them out.
    Only other option was the pill or antibiotics (long term use). Neither of those options I liked neither did DD.
    The GP says it hormonal and is pretty sure they will start to settle down by 16.
    There is another medication which I've forgotten the name of which can be used but GP said the side effects are too high to justify using it in DD situation.
    Poor thing. Hopefully it does settle when she's 16.

  5. #55
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    I personally would let her do it. I know we'll face these things with our DD and I hope I can keep my mind open and remember how my Mum handled these things. Mum didn't sweat about stuff like hair dye. I probably dyed mine at 14 (packet job). It didn't look that great but that was my problem. My older siblings were very rebellious so I think Mum learnt perspective pretty early on. I appreciated her letting me have autonomy with my hair and not fussing about when I started shaving my legs etc etc. When I was 16 I took myself to the salon and got second earring holes pierced. She didn't even blink, and I was still a good kid!

    Now that I'm a parent I see the value in compromise with things like this. The school our kids go to is strict with hair colour but so they will be restricted by that but within the guidelines...sure thing.

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  7. #56
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    I think I would let my daughter at 13

    (she's 5 so I can't answer that as a matter of fact, but I think I would!)

  8. #57
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    I started dying my hair at 13, but that was because my older sister had just started her hairdressing apprenticeship then and she needed a model. I'm not sure if I'd have been allowed to at that age if that weren't the case, but my parents didn't seem to have a problem with it.
    OP I would probably let her get a couple of foils. I can't say for sure because I'm about 10 years away from this situation, but I'd like to think that if I went with her and it would boost her self esteem, I'd go ahead and do it. I'd rather that than have her do a supermarket dye job with her friends!

  9. #58
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    I wish my mum put her foot down and didn't let me colour my beautiful Scandinavian blonde hair at 13 it went mousy brown

  10. #59
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    I would let her - but only if she could pay for it herself. In regards to body autonomy - I read some unschooling pages on facebook where there was an obese child with her teeth rotting and falling from her mouth. He parents allowed her to make her own decisions about what she ate every day (chocolate, chips and coke for dinner) & didnt make her brush her teeth (her body, her choice). Their dilemma was what to do with her rotting teeth because the child didnt want to go to the dentist (her body, her choice). The point of this story is that someimes children dont have the maturity to understand the long term consequences of their decisions. That's why we parents are responsible for making choices for them. That being said, I would encourage hair dye that causes less damage to the hair, as PP suggested - & I would think it would be ok.

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  12. #60
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    Quote Originally Posted by cheeeeesecake View Post
    I would let her - but only if she could pay for it herself. In regards to body autonomy - I read some unschooling pages on facebook where there was an obese child with her teeth rotting and falling from her mouth. He parents allowed her to make her own decisions about what she ate every day (chocolate, chips and coke for dinner) & didnt make her brush her teeth (her body, her choice). Their dilemma was what to do with her rotting teeth because the child didnt want to go to the dentist (her body, her choice). The point of this story is that someimes children dont have the maturity to understand the long term consequences of their decisions. That's why we parents are responsible for making choices for them. That being said, I would encourage hair dye that causes less damage to the hair, as PP suggested - & I would think it would be ok.
    I agree 100%. My kids are not my property or possession but part of my job as a parent is to show guidance and leadership. My eldest doesn't like me to hassle her about what she has on at school. So last week I didn't and she forgot all about her debating night. I wasn't even aware it was on.

    It broke my heart to see how upset she was with herself about this. Yes she learned a lesson but honestly she's 11 and she'll probably make the same mistakes several times yet before it really changes.

    So in the meantime I'm going to support and guide her along


 

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