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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheGooch View Post
    Ugh i don't know where my reply went!
    Anyway, not sure if it will help you decide, but have you considered having genetic testing done in relation to the familial cancer link?
    The reason I ask is my sister, cousin and I have been tested and have a fault on the BRCA1 gene. Because of that, we have health care plans in place that include plans for surgery (mastectomy and hysterectomy) to reduce risk.
    This may not answer your tubes tying question, but it may be helpful for overall healthcare and risk management.
    If a specific risk was detected, it may get you to think about it more a health management than being done with kids or not.
    I'm not really explaining myself well. I know what i'm trying to say but it's not coming out right. Sorry about that.
    No i totally get what you are saying.
    When i was at the breast specialist she referred me to a geneticist so waiting for a call to have an appointment there.
    Unfortunately my mum is against having genetic testing which is not all that helpful for my own testing from what i gather - i guess ill find out more once i see the geneticist.

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  3. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by clb84 View Post
    I've just had the copper IUD 'installed' 2 weeks ago. I'm in the same boat, extremely hormone sensitive and too early for DP to consider getting the snip.

    What I've read and what my Gyno has said is they can't guarantee how painful/heavy the periods will be.
    I take zinc supplements daily as zinc can assist to offset a copper imbalance in your body (been taking zinc for a couple of years before this), I'm yet to have a period (although it felt like I got one straight away after the insertion) so I can't comment on that for me as yet.

    You could always give this a go - it lasts for 5 years and it isn't permanent.

    Best of luck. I'm hoping DP agrees to the snip when the time comes because I've had years of gyno issues too. X
    I had a mirena put in about 18mths ago and it fell out by itself
    Im so lucky i felt an itch and realised it had come loose or we would likely have had a whoopsie baby.

    This is why i dont think i could do another IUD cause id be paranoid the whole time that it would come out.
    Probably unlikely to happen twice to one person but i know it would be constantly on my mind

  4. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by besha View Post
    I wouldn't get it done either. For me personally, I've had enough gynae/fertility related surgeries that I wouldn't go adding another unless it was absolutely necessary.

    In your position, if DH didn't want to get the snip, I'd be insisting on condoms or risking pregnancy - his call. You could possibly look into a non hormonal form of contraception like a copper iud but they obviously have their own pros/cons so you'd need to weigh up those for yourself.

    As far as the history of breast cancer goes, I would be getting tested to find out if I had a faulty BRCA gene as a pp said (if you haven't already) and if I did, putting further plans in place to maximise my chances of staying healthy beyond not using hormonal contraception. Obviously that might include surgery that would render the tubal ligation unnecessary.

    Good luck with your decision!
    Yes im waiting on a geneticist appointment.

    I currently have ultrasound and mammogram every 12mths at a specialist centre.

  5. #14
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    For those asking DH's reasons unfortunately thats a hard question to answer because he doesnt really have a reason that makes any sense.

    We've been talking about it as an option since i was preg with DS 4yrs ago and he is yet to agree.

    I know him not having a valid 'reason' is completely ridiculous, immature and dammed annoying.

  6. #15
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    I would be buying the roughest, thickest, driest condoms and some lube and be telling dh that if he isn't getting the snip then you are choosing the contraception. There are minimal risks to him but reasonable risks to you if you get your tubes tied. Not fair especially when you have spent a few years carrying babies

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  8. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by RmumR View Post
    I had a mirena put in about 18mths ago and it fell out by itself
    Im so lucky i felt an itch and realised it had come loose or we would likely have had a whoopsie baby.

    This is why i dont think i could do another IUD cause id be paranoid the whole time that it would come out.
    Probably unlikely to happen twice to one person but i know it would be constantly on my mind
    Mine came out, too. My gyno said the risk of it falling out a second time increases from 5% to 10%.


    Quote Originally Posted by RmumR View Post
    For those asking DH's reasons unfortunately thats a hard question to answer because he doesnt really have a reason that makes any sense.

    We've been talking about it as an option since i was preg with DS 4yrs ago and he is yet to agree.

    I know him not having a valid 'reason' is completely ridiculous, immature and dammed annoying.
    While the reason may not be considered valid to you or I, it must be for him and that's important. I don't think it's fair for women to expect men to get the snip because we've done everything else (not aimed at you, just generally speaking).
    If he's scared about the procedure and after effects, I'd suggest for him to book an appointment just to discuss it all and make it clear that there's no pressure, but it's something that you do want him to consider because of x, y, z. If he feels like it's solely his decision, maybe he will be more open to it.

  9. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by atomicmama View Post
    Mine came out, too. My gyno said the risk of it falling out a second time increases from 5% to 10%.




    While the reason may not be considered valid to you or I, it must be for him and that's important. I don't think it's fair for women to expect men to get the snip because we've done everything else (not aimed at you, just generally speaking).
    If he's scared about the procedure and after effects, I'd suggest for him to book an appointment just to discuss it all and make it clear that there's no pressure, but it's something that you do want him to consider because of x, y, z. If he feels like it's solely his decision, maybe he will be more open to it.
    I get that and as frustrating as it is i cannot force him to do it and i wouldnt want him to feel forced either.

    I was quite settled in my decision until it became so much more 'real' by seeing the gyn and throwing around dates as options.

    I have some unexplained bleeding so need to have an exploratory op to see whats going on in there so getting tubes tied at same time seemed reasonable.....

    I think it might be the finality of it all thats giving me jitters and uncertainty

  10. #18
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    Could you postpone getting your tubes tied until he gets more information about a vasectomy?
    Would you hold it against him if you get your tubes tied and have effects from it?

  11. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by atomicmama View Post
    Could you postpone getting your tubes tied until he gets more information about a vasectomy?
    Would you hold it against him if you get your tubes tied and have effects from it?
    I could postpone quite easily im sure though not sure if he would even go through with getting more information.

    He has all the pamphlets with info of the different methods. He has close friends who've had it done and have encouraged him to 'just do it'

    He is so against having it done himself he seemed almost pleased that i need the exploratory gyn surgery as now its 'easy' for me to have it done

  12. #20
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    OP, has your DH read any info on post tubal ligation syndrome. I am your DH in that I refuse to have my tubes tied...it will never be happening. I said it from before we even had kids...either he got a vasectomy or we would rely on condoms forever. DH was not thrilled that I just refused to do it...he had really only known of women to have their tubes tied, and knew no one who had a vasectomy. Then I showed him the information on ptls, and pointed out how many of them my mum had suffered with...serious symptoms that were life changing for her. It opened DH's eyes as to why I wasn't prepared to risk it. In the end, he chose to have a vasectomy, which I was obviously thrilled with...but if he refused it would have been condoms and abstinence around ovulation.
    No, your DH shouldn't feel forced to have a vasectomy, but you shouldn't feel forced to have a procedure you're uncomfortable with either.
    Good luck ☺


 

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