Happy Birthday @BlondeinBrisvegas. Hope you have a great day!!!
Thank-you for all the birthday wishes Lovelies!!!!
I must admit I'm pretty "caked out" from baking 4 cakes in the last couple of weeks (3 for DD and one for the Ex) so I decided to just whip up one of my banana and walnut loaves for my birthday cake today
In addition to that, I have my yummy chocoalte that my sister bought me and some yummy chocolate mudcake ice cream I bought for myself from Aldi this morning for my birthday as well as shouting myself a Thai Green Curry for lunch
Am about to go and get ready for my massage that I've booked for this afternoon I saved the last appointment I had left from the vouchers that the Ex bought me for Mothers Day for today so am looking forward to it
Hope everyone is having a lovely day and that @Mongol's EPU has gone well
I used to get overwhelming breakdowns whenever I had a failed cycle, the dark wave I call it. Sooo bad. Totally out of control.
And then I decided that I didn't want the Ivf do that to me on the top of everything else. And for my 2 last cycles I managed to keep it at bay. I mean of course I was terribly sad but I didnt allow myself to get in that state of total despair which made me feel stronger and more in control.
This is really personal of course.
This ruminating concept sounds really interesting too. Pretty sure we all do it.
Glad for you that your session was good.
As per the determined part of you, I'd say it doesn't take a psych to see it!
Thanks for the kind words @Maxwellsmum.
In btwn cycles, I usually tend to stay more away from the threads and all that's related to Ivf just because I need to breathe and regroup before the next cycle.
I need to feel "normal" for a lil while.. Ah! Normal. What a joke.
Nek minnit I'm still here coz I got attached to this group.
I'm not always writing, and the thread is moving so fast! But I'm reading and I'm still here.
Sure I'd like access to the Safe House, just not sure how I'll keep up with 3 threads at the same time ahahah!
Thx for offering
Happy birthday @BlondeinBrisvegas have an awesome day.
Thanks all you lovelies for your support. I had my EPU this morning and ) eggs were retrieved. I was disappointed as I was expecting more (last cycle I had 11 retrieved with a lower dose of Gonal f, and only 2 survived till day 5). I'm hoping they all fertilise this time and reach day 5 for testing, fingers crossed!
This EPU was much more painful that last one, I woke up crying eight pain and got given morphine 5 times plus panadol and I was fine then. Off to sleep now.
@Maxwellsmum i can relate to that so such. I havent done the contrmplating killing myself (coz who would feed the cats?) But i did have 2 weeks where i woke up disappointed that i was still alive, i.e. wished i would die on my sleep or get hit by a bus or contract some horrible disease that would make ivf pale in comparison. So...not good thoughts and very scary. Worst thing was i thought i would stay like that forever. Like you, that failed cycle also coincided with other terrible life stuff like my pet chickens being torn to shreds by a dog. When i think back on that 2 weeks of doom n gloom in the pit of despair, its the chickens that still makes me tear up moreso than the end of searching for my own eggs. So, i think when you2doing ivf it makes it very very difficult to deal with any other bad stuff that happens. xox im really glad that your super application is progressing though. Damn i wish i had have gotten on board for that in time for this oseas cycle. I wonder if they'll back date it, like, give you the money after youve paid for the cycle. Imnpaying for it with a loan so surely that proves im broke?
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