@Maxwellsmum Good point. I always hated cycling with people as I knew Id be the dodo with debbie downer news. So @BIB close up the Nov roll call as being full. No one else can cycle in November.
Maxwellsmum, it must feel awful not to be able to find anyone like you. I know whenever i failed i always googled to find others like me. Thats how i found bubhub in the first place. I dont know peopke from the known donor program specifically but you're definately not the only lady to get a bfn on a donor cycle. If the same lady is still in the program, that might be a good sign, in that they would have 'culled' (that sounds awful, soz) her from the program, you'd think? Im so sorry that it hasnt worked for you yet.
@Charlie74 i think i can understand your thinking. Needing to make a plan b just in case and wanting to know how soon you can start working on plan b if its needed. I started thinking about surrogacy the other day, you know, for when i become a multiple failed de ivf lady. Thank god negative thinking doesnt affect embryos! We'd all be doomed. xox
Billie2 noooo! Ive already been googling flight prices for a second trip to athens in november! Although ive also been googling good ancient greek names for my imaginary twin girls (even though i dont want twins, i think???) Im having one of those gollum vs. smeagol days today. Sigh...
@gorgeousgeorge ok, a different time zone is allowed..
I am embarrassingly watching Love Island and I just learnt that a wombat, kangaroo, Tas devil and a Koala all have 3 vaginas. Whats with the Aussies?
Last edited by Billie2; 30-08-2016 at 22:14.
Billie2 I would do the same keep November to yourself. Lock that month down tight.
@Tahli you're right they don't waste time cycling their donors again with kniwn donors either mines done another here already and is doing a third in November. Is there a limit with them at all. As I'm feeling a bit put off with that as well TBH. Half of Brisbane will be related to any babies we have at the rate she's cycling.
Last edited by Maxwellsmum; 30-08-2016 at 22:13.
@Maxwellsmum I think you need to come and play softball with me. Lets swing a bat... Really feel for you tonight. I know others disappear when sh1t hits the fan, and maybe we need to reach out and hold them up a but more xx
@Maxwellsmum xox i dont think you have to feel guilty about being "selfish". Its not a fun feeling but i think it is normal. Very very normal response to your situation. And those pangs of jealousy are normal and ok too. I always think, its not like im being jealous of material possessions. The things we want for ourselves re: ivf are really meaningful and worthwhile life experiences, i.e. we just want more love in our lives and i dont think its unreasonable as a human being to yearn and long for something like that. I always think of the dalai lama and how buddists say to accept things and stop desiring thing to become truly happy. Which is a philosophy i believe in and have strived to acheive in my pre-ivf life. I struggled with not just accepting that i wouldnt gave kids and thought i should just stop wanting it and work on acceptance of my situation. But after lots of thought, i think if i was to say to the dalai lama 'i want and desire more love in my life' that he would say 'oh thats different then. Its totally ok to desire and want to give and receive more love in your life". You've had a really really hard run and its ok to be sad and pi-ssed off and selfish and bitter and jealous and all the rest, mate. xox
@Charlie74 that was so perfectly worded.
@gorgeousgeorge You always know what to say. And add in a lesson for all if us. If one more person tells me that "things happen for a reason" I will rip off their head and sh1t down their neck.. In a nice way.. Anyone who says that hasn't walked into a children's ward.
Last edited by Billie2; 30-08-2016 at 22:46.
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