my maiden name is very unusual. I've never used it on fb, I just had a made up surname instead. it worked well, potential employers could never find me on fb haha.
I'm now married and have my husband's surname but continue to use my pseudonym surname.
I don't really buy the I had a stalker/abusive ex therefore need to have a shared fb account. surely if privacy was such an issue, you wouldn't be on fb at all?