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  1. #471
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    Hi ladies,

    So got the sentence call and I'm half dead right now:
    Out of 10, 6 were mature and only one fertilised.
    In shock. Fertility rate hasn't been our issue so far, can't believe that it's adding to the list.

    Now. I'm facing a huge dilemma: the plan was to push them to Day5 to see what happens. The nurse asked me what I want to do considering I have only one. I didnt chicken out and said day5.

    But now I'm having doubts... The whole point of pushing till day5 was to " study " them, is one representative though?

    DF wants day5 cos he thinks that if the embie doesnt make it in the dish, it would be the same inside me. And so he doesnt want me to be on crinone and go through the emotional 2ww for nothing.

    Me... I'm a mess. I can't think.
    I know it's a personal decision but I d like your inputs about day3 vs day5 transfer in case of one embryo only?

    Pros and cons?
    No matter what my choice is, I just need to be convinced it is the right one. No regrets.

    Thank you in advance for your thoughts

    Thank

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  3. #472
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    @LillyM Everyone is getting a serve of poo cake today. Im so sorry and angry for you. It doesnt make any sense. No rules in IVF you once said to me and that is so true. I dont know. I sent you a message. Remove your heart and make the decision with your head. Base your decision on no regrets.. xxxxxx

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  5. #473
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    @LillyM oh lilly, im so sorry :-( You know, my stats just got worse, the more i cycled. Started off getting blasties, and frosties, 75% fertilisation first cycle, but then each cycle things got worse. I wish i understood why. Sigh...
    I totally understand your day 3 /day 5 dilema. Last cycle when i had 1 emby on day 2, i was all tough n just told them grow it to day 5 because id rather it die in the dish. But an hour later i chickened out and rang them back n went in the next day for a day 3 transfer.
    Its so so hard. Such a mind fruck. I do actually believe what they say about the dish being just as good as the womb. Im personally not a believer in the 'better in than out' theory because fs and embryologists are scientists and they wouldnt do the day 5 thing if science showed in utero was better.
    I believe that if its a good healthy strong golden emby it will grow in the dish till day 5 and it would do the same in utero.
    I dont know if this helps and its a bit morbid but... i ended up deciding that if my little emby was gonna die, then i thought id like to give it a more natural death, by letting it die inside me, rather than being thrown in the bin or whatever it is they do with our little deceased maybe-babies. My other deciding factor was that, as i have to travel for et, i got the day off work, had the et then had the rest of the day as a 'me day'. Went to bunnings, bought seedlings n played in my garden which was better than being at work, scared that my phone would ring and ruin my day.
    I believe whatever you decide to do, it wont affect the embryo so you won't make the 'wrong' decision. There is no 'wrong' thing to decide.
    Sometimes when i have yo choise between 2 s h i t t y options, i think about how i would feel after taking each option. So maybe thinking, what would be worse for you personally: waiting to day 5, maybe learning something and maybe not having et, wondering if you had have put it in day 3 it might have worked (but i dont believe that rationally/scientifically) OR doing a day 3 and suffering the tww.
    They are both s h i t t y options mate and im so sorry you have yo pick one of them.
    Maybe ask fs about whether 1 emby is representative and see what he thinks you should do?
    I really feel for you, to go from 10eggs to 1emby in one phone call would be devastating. xoxoxox

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  7. #474
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    @LillyM im sorry to hear your news. Ive previously done mainly d3 and d2 transfers. Yes if they dont survive till d5 then they wouldnt have survived but the way i looked at it was you never know. My clinic mainly did d3 transfers as i get low embie numbers. My fs thought sometimes they were better in than out. Xxx

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  9. #475
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    Default IVF over 40#37

    Far out, yep it's a sh-itty day all round isn't it? So sorry to hear about your BFN @Heyside, it never gets easier... I hope you do take some time out to regroup & settle before having to make any new decisions. @Lilym that is bad news & you would have thought from 10 that at least half would have made it. I can't offer any advice but huge hugs xx

    So to top off today, I just started getting the first pink tinge of AF & thinking about that tiny speck of an embryo who died before she really had a chance to start - & I log on to FB & DHs cousin has a birth announcement. First go trying, honeymoon baby, little girl they named Savannah which was on our names list.

    I asked DH to call them & congratulate them from work so I don't have to hear him gush about it. He gets so excited over babies & right now I just can't face hearing that :-(
    Last edited by Summer; 20-08-2016 at 14:16.

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  11. #476
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    @LillyM Oh Luv!!! What a shock it must've been to hear that😦 I'm so sorry (((Hugs)))

    It frucking sux Luv it really does!!! 😦

    Day 3 vs Day 5 transfer??? My FS (Wazza) is a great believer in Day 5 transfers whether you have 1 embryo or 10. He reckons if they can make it to Day 5 in the dish then you're in with a better chance of them continuing to grow inside of your oven.

    I personally believe if an embryo has the energy to keep growing & implant it will do that regardless of what day you transfer on though in saying that I'm not in favour of Day 2 transfers myself.

    You have a couple of days to think about it & decide. You have to do what feels right to do for you Luvxoxo
    Last edited by BlondeinBrisvegas; 20-08-2016 at 14:24.

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  13. #477
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    @Summer sigh...everyones always frucking pregnant hey! Its frucked! It becomes so pervasive, you know? You're going along, thinking you're doing ok then BAM! Yesterday i was watching the olympics n there was this ad for farming tractors and the whole ad was showing farmers n their families n babies on the frucking tractors and the jingle was about "keeping the family farming generations alive" n i was like FFS! Its a frucking tractor ad! Why all the babies?!!! Then it cuts back to the rowing n their interviewing the parents of an aussie rower and they mention how their son and his wife lost a baby very late term and how even if he wins today the real gold medal will be the healthy birth from his, currently pregnant again, wife. I was like FFS im trying to watch the olympics n now they're doing an interview about angel babies! Its very hard to particpate in normal life, when normal life and the whole human experience is all about families.

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  15. #478
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    Oh gosh, more bad news. I'm so sorry @LillyM

    For my two cents worth....My feeling is that if an emby isn't strong enough to get to Day 5 in the dish, it probably won't get past that inside it's Momma either. So essentially your choice is to try your luck (at no disadvantage to the emby) by putting it back in at Day 3, or letting it go and hoping for the best in the dish.

    It kind of depends on how you look at things. For me personally, it is a choice between letting your emby either grow or pass inside you, or saving yourself the extra cost of a transfer should it not make it to Day 5 in the dish. It has to be your decision hon, and yours alone. I'm sorry you have to make it at all

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  17. #479
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    @LillyM also was just thinking...whatever you choose to do, i find that i always wonder about the what ifs anyway. I think that one of the hard things about ivf is that no matter what choice you make, you'll never definately know whether it was the 'right' one or if any of the options you discarded would have been the 'right' one. I think ive learned a life lesson kinda thing from ivf. Sometimes the only choices you have are all s h i t t y ones with their own disadvantages. Ao like, you can choose sh-itty option A or sh-itty option B. Like peeps who have to choose which treatment option they want for cancer. And life lesson that sometimes you have to make choices and you'll never get any confirmation of whether you chose the 'right' one. Its small compensation but sometimes i tried to think, at least ive still got choices and options even if they are all s h i t ones.

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  19. #480
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    @gorgeousgeorge I live near the water and every September I am reminded of infertility by the stupid wild ducks and its 42 ducklings waddling up the street pooing on our lawn. Rub it in our face why dont you! I allow DS to shoot any on our lawn with nerf gun.

    If I come back as an animal, I want to be a swamp wallaby. Did you know they have 2 uterus's and can get pregnant when they are pregnant!!

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