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  1. #1
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    Default Tell me about relationship counselling

    So - tell me about relationship counselling.

    Have you been? If you're comfortable saying - why did you go? Did it help?

    How many sessions did you go for? Was it expensive? I presume it's not covered by the mental health care plans you can get from the GP so psychologist sessions are cheaper?

    Do you know if your counsellor used any particular specific types of technique with you, and if so, what was it?

    Thanks in advance

  2. #2
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    Bump for the evening crowd

  3. #3
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    Cost and techniques depend on where you go.

    I've heard that Relationships Australia have a particular style of counselling that is different from other places. I heard this from my lawyer. I can't elaborate because I have no experience with them. I'm not sure about the costs.

    I got a mental health plan from the GP and we went to a psychologist. The psychologist saw us together and separately.

    In terms of was it worth it. Not really for me. I had already mentally checked out of the relationship and in hindsight I was looking for someone to tell me my reasons for wanting to leave were good enough. I was in a DV situation though and would have been better off just packing my bags and leaving. Telling exdh I wanted to go to counselling gave him advance notice I wanted out and resulted in him ramping up the abuse.

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    Wow, I'm sorry to hear that, @SSecret Squirrel.

    Thankfully, no DV here. Just unhappiness, verbal fighting, and not communicating well. We both want to work on it - so hopefully we can.

    Interesting to hear you were able to get a mental health plan from the GP - might have to check that out.

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    We used relationships Australia first and i had a terrible feeling about how it was being managed so i quit. The counsellor seemed VERY basic and not at all aware of strategies to allow both of us to speak and be heard. I felt that we left each session with a lot of open wounds and no strategies/homework so it made it worse!
    I then used a psychologist for the next level of help...went alone and then asked DH to join in. It was fantastic for me personally. Having said that, our marriage didn't survive, but we are soooo much better off for the communication that took place and the work we did. I got a mental health plan because i qualified as "stressed" at the time. Didn't need to be depressed or such to qualify and it was really helpful to go and definitely saved bigger issues developing.
    I do believe a counsellor who is a poor fit can do more harm than good, so if it doesn't feel right don't be afraid to change. I liked the psychologist for some deeper thinking on things and helping us understand "why" a bit better.

  6. #6
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    We have used relationships Australia. A lot of fighting because of our infertility. The person we had is a physiologist not a counsellor so that helped us slot because of her background.

    DP still see's them occasionally now because of issues from his childhood (abusive upbringing).

    Price wise dp pays $70 a session which goes for an hr. It's based on household income and set on a sliding scale.

    I think you will find if you go to a phycologist in private practice you can pay up to $200 a session and it's not covered by Medicare. I used one for my DS when they where 4 and it was out of pocket expense.

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    We had pre-marriage counselling through a local church, free of charge. They also offer free follow up 'courses' - it's not run by professional psychologists etc (run by enthusiastic volunteers), but more focussed on giving you the tools to work on your relationship together as a couple. I'd like to do another as we find it very difficult now, with 2 young children, to put any time or effort into our relationship.

    I think that kind of thing is a good alternative to traditional counselling, for couples that need to re-prioritise their relationship and improve communication etc. Or as a starting point for those experiencing difficulties, providing both parties are willing to put in the effort.

  8. #8
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    My xh and I did a few sessions with a private psych.
    I guess in my heart of hearts i have to admit I went to make sure I could say I did everything to help save my marriage.
    To be honest I think our relationship was too far gone and I had already 'left' the marriage.

    I guess for us. No amount of counseling was going to fix 2 people who were just so different. And in hindsight, freedom and awareness I have been able to see that there was a lot of control issues that I probably didn't see at the time.

    I must admit. I did take a lot out of the sessions and it has certainly helped me in my new partnership.

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    Default Tell me about relationship counselling

    When DS was first born we attended, but we found that going separately (to the same counsellor) and talking about it afterwards was more effective for us.

    It gave us each a voice and reassurance within ourselves to tackle the issues, if that makes sense.

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    Default Babybeeno1

    It's good ure partner has counseling,my dh had an extremely abusive upbringing and he refuses to seek any help,he says he can't trust anybody,he's amazing with our ds but I worry when I go back to work how he's going to cope,he's on a disability pension because he can't work in society due to extreme anxiety,it can be stressful but he just won't get the help that he needs


 

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