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  1. #1
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    Default Calling all those with a keen interest in politics!

    Background - DH and I met when I was 18 and he was 21. Neither of us cared much for politics but voted the way our parents did as that's all we knew. As we grew up together and our relationship solidified, we found ourselves thinking and feeling almost identically about a range of social/economic/political issues. Now 13 years on, I get much pleasure from talking to him about politics, because not only does he agree with me but he adds greater dimensions to how I see different issues but we are still in the same vein.

    Because of this, I have often observed other long term successful relationships and considered how their relationship works around the issue of politics. From most of my observations either a) the couple are on the same end of the voting spectrum or b) one person cares deeply about politics and the other doesn't so much

    I recently went out to dinner with a new friend who told me that her husband is at one end of the spectrum and she is at the other, but are both equally passionate about political issues. This completely bemused me because I really thought that you would essentially have very fundamental differences in how you see the world and that wouldn't make for a great relationship. She just said that they don't talk about politics much. But it got me thinking:

    1) Do you and your partner both have a deep interest in politics, and if so do you vote the same way?

    2) Could you be in a relationship with someone where you had very different views? (personally I absolutely couldn't. I have many friends who have polar opposite political views to me, but I don't have to live with them, make life decisions with them or raise children with them)

    Thanks in advance, from my curious mind

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    I definitely have much more of an interest than dh - to the point where I told him who to vote for in the recent election.

    He does have some differing views, but doesn't feel passionately enough for it to be a problem when we are discussing anything political. I can understand ( though not agree) to some extent, because I know my opinions are extremely left.


    ETA if someone had opposing political views to me, it's unlikely I would be able to have a relationship with them, as our core values would be vastly different.
    Last edited by atomicmama; 25-07-2016 at 15:18.

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    DH and I are both very interested in politics. We tend to have very similar views too. Honestly I'd struggle to be with someone right wing. Really struggle.

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    I really only started getting into politics in 2007 (I was 28). Prior to that I was a swing voter but didn't really know what I was voting for. The more reading and listening I did, the more left-leaning I became to the point now where DH and I joke that I'm practically a communist.
    DH always voted Liberal until either the 2007 2 or 2010 election. His lean towards the left was more due to an anti-religion stance and the fact that the right is rather heavily Christian and are unable to separate their religion from politics (obviously this is a subjective statement). In saying that, he would vote for whomever he felt had the best policies in our electorate (and right now we have a hard core right wing Christian who we both loathe).

    While we never really discussed politics when we got together, I think it was clear our values on a lot of topics were similar and at the root of it, politics is based on values. As a result we have actually gotten more similar as we both shun religion and have a very liberal outlook (in it's actual sense) on marriage equality, asylum seekers, human rights etc. DH works in economics so also has a strong view on the monetary side of things. That's still difficult for me to understand because I find it all pretty confusing.

    If he was a dead set right wing voter (like my dad) there is no way I would be able to stay with him. However I think that fundamentally we would have had so many differences in values initially that we probably wouldn't have gotten together in the first place (IYKWIM).

    My parents divorced after 28 years of marriage. Dad is a staunch right wing and mum is very much left. While it wasn't the cause of their divorce, their differences in values just became impossible for her to overcome (they married because it was the "right thing to do" after falling pregnant with me, not because they were madly in love). I find it almost impossible to have a conversation with dad about a lot of things now because of our political and religious differences. I am friends with and like a few people who are Lib voters but most of my friends are left leaning.

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    first question, I would say no, not a deep interest, but politics does tend to have some impact on everyone's life, so we do have some interest.
    second question, I don't think I would be in a relationship with some one who was totally opposite to me. It is important to agree with the person you are spending your lifetime with, but it is not necessary for you have exactly the same thoughts on every subject. There should always be acceptance, agree to differ, if that is necessary.
    marie

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    Those that have really strong views, how does this affect your friendships? Can you be close friends with people who have opposite political views?

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    Quote Originally Posted by GingerKat View Post
    Those that have really strong views, how does this affect your friendships? Can you be close friends with people who have opposite political views?
    Probably not. As I said earlier, that would mean vastly different core values, so it's unlikely they would be the kind of person that I would want as a friend anyway.

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    Hmmmm this thread is making me think a little harder than my baby brain wants 😂

    DH and I are not super passionate about politics but we are definitely interested and have firm opinions on a range of social and political
    Issues.

    We are definitely not in complete accord in those opinions though. On some things we are in complete agreement. Other things we are definitely in opposition. I am definitely more left than him. That said I think DH's current work and work that he has done in the past makes his position on some issues understandable - even though I don't agree. For example we have very different views on asylum seekers. DH has spent extensive time working at the detention centres like Christmas Island, Nauru, Manus and Villawood. We are in 100% agreement it is no place for children but then our views diverge. Given some of the experiences he has shared with me during that time - I understand his view.

    So whilst I don't think you need to be perfectly in line with each - I do think being polar opposite on the majority of issues would make for very uncomfortable bed fellows!

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    Quote Originally Posted by atomicmama View Post
    Probably not. As I said earlier, that would mean vastly different core values, so it's unlikely they would be the kind of person that I would want as a friend anyway.
    Hmm interesting! I see what you're saying but personally I'm totally fine with having left wing friends (I'm right wing). My close friend (bridesmaid at my wedding etc) is a teacher, heavily involved in the teachers union, loves Waleed we have very different views on may things and often have little debates which have us laughing at the end because we are so different. I think why we work though is because we both are respectful to one another but I can also understand her view points although I may not agree, and vice versa. Having said all this, I don't think I could be super close friends with a Greens voter

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    We do have an interest and we generally vote the same way. I have quite a few friends who work in that world I work in policy so it's def something we keep up with regularly. I love question time

    No I could never be with anyone right wing. I've had friendships end over a clash of ideals. My circle are 95% left and mostly passionately so.

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