I have to say, as much as I can sense how frustrated you are with her constant interfering & pushiness, I feel for her too, her boyfriend doesn't sound very supportive or even loving. I know I would be p!ssed if I messaged my DH on FB & he didn't respond, even though he was recently active! Then he goes out until 2am and didn't pick up his phone. She definitely sounds lonely to me and needs to have a chat to her boyfriend to ship up or ship out, he's not treating her with much respect.
My thoughts are also with your uncle xxxx