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  1. #1
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    Default Is living in a sharehouse with a newborn plain crazy?

    Hi,
    My partner and I are going to start trying for a (first) baby in november, so I'm starting to gather information on "How to do the parenting thing".

    At the moment we live in a shared house with 2 other housemates. We all have our own bedrooms and we're all working (so no student lifestyle). However the walls are thin and the shared areas are, well, shared.
    We're going to tell the guys that we plan on having a baby some time next year (hopefully) and wether they choose to stay or leave is up to them. At least that's the plan we thought of with my husband, but the more I read about living with a newborn the more hesitant I am as to how liveable this will be (if my housemates decide to stay).

    Does anyone have that kind of experience? And even if you don't, do you think it's an unreasonable living arrangement?

    I should also pecise that we could afford to live by ourselves, sharing is just a convenience. Our lease ends in January 2018, when we will all have to move anyway.

    If you have any advice or opinion to share, that would be awesome

  2. #2
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    I have a 12 month old DD and no way in hell would I live in a share house with a new baby (either as the parent or the housemate), sorry to be so blunt. Babies cry. A lot. Loudly. The baby will wake up the housemates. You'll be stressed about the baby crying and disturbing them. You don't need more stress when you have a newborn. My DD still wakes overnight.
    If you have the means then I'd definitely look to set up by yourselves, I think it will be easier on you as a couple and easier on your housemates. All the best with TTC!!
    In terms of initiating breastfeeding (if that's your plan) you'll probably want privacy til you get the hang of it. Having a newborn is also tough on your relationship so that might be hard with others around.

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  4. #3
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    Sounds like a pretty bad idea. It's really tough having a newborn, there are times you find yourself wondering around the house at 3am with only pj bottoms on covered in baby vomit. It's definitely a time when you want you own space, privacy and not stress about noise, covering up and being up at all hours of the nighg

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    Default Is living in a sharehouse with a newborn plain crazy?

    No way in hell would I live in a share house with a baby!
    Babies are loud, cry, scream, poop, spew and are so demanding.
    It will be stressful enough with a baby let alone worrying about pi$$ing off your house mates with noise, the house mates waking the baby, taking up space with baby paraphernalia.
    It sounds like my worst night mare, sorry.

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    Default Is living in a sharehouse with a newborn plain crazy?

    no way. it's not fair on anyone involved. you'll want your own space with a newborn. you'll also find you'll be sprawling all across the house with a baby...eg you'll want to be able to breastfeed in the living areas and not have to feel confined to your room only. do you really want to be breastfeeding in front of your housemate? esp in the early days, it's hard!!

    I couldn't think of anything worse than a housemate when you have a newborn. even now, ds is 4.5m old, it would be stressful. babies cry, you don't want the stress of worrying about disturbing your housemate. babies also put a strain on your relationship..you're both sleep deprived and prone to snapping at eachother. do you really want your housemate to witness all this? I also think it would be really unfair on your housemate, they'd probably feel really awkward about it all too.

    so yeah, short answer is no way.
    Last edited by turquoisecoast; 12-07-2016 at 16:15.

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  10. #6
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    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
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    Would rather saw off my arm with a chainsaw. Don't do it! Living with my partner is hard enough 😂

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    From a practical perspective no I don't think it's a great idea from the mentioned reasons above, but also from a relationship perspective it was a really special time when our baby was born. DH and I were getting to know him and I would feel that having house mates would impede on that a bit. At least with guests they go home, but when I was bonding with my baby the last thing I wanted personally was having people around me constantly. With housemates and shared areas you'd be confined to your bedroom a lot I think. It's a pretty special and personal time so if there is no reason to share I think getting your own place set up would be a better idea.

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    On the flip side, you'd have another grown up around, which could be good in some ways, especially when your DP is at work, if they are home. Eg can you just hold the baby, while i go take a shower? Maybe they'd do some cooking for you too!

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    Personally I wouldn't have liked being in a share house when my baby was born, when you get home from hospital all you want is baby and dad around, maybe nan, but I love it when it's just us at home, I always looked forward to visitors leaving, and I LOVE my friends and family. It's true that you stress about them waking other people, I had a friend stay over because her work is right Around the corner and I was worried about her waking, even though she said not to. But if your really comfortable around them then it's your personal choice really.
    If you plan to breastfeed and don't wanna get your boobs out in front of them that could be an issue too, it gets really boring to be in your room feeding which you do a lot when they are little, like every couple of hours.

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    When we had DD1, DH sister and a close friend lived with us. Our daughter didn't ever cry so she was never an issue for the household, they all adored her. Some issues that we did have was our friend smoked which would smell through the house, SIL would bring all sorts of guys home so DD would never be out of my sight and on occasions they would have friends over being extremely loud that would wake DD who wanted to join the party. Lasted 4 months before we asked them all to leave.

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