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  1. #1
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    Default Confused about sleeping habits!

    Hi all,

    I'm so confused about what advice to follow in regards to my DD's sleep! We never really gave this much thought before she was born - all I really decided on was that I would hold her as often as I wanted to.

    Now DD is 4 weeks old and my head is spinning from all the unsolicited advice! The nurse and my mother think I should put her down and let her settle herself to sleep.
    My sister says do whatever you have to do in these early weeks, just as long as she sleeps.
    Google says swaddle, swaddle, swaddle.

    I know habits of newborns change so frequently, but currently bubs does need to be fed/cuddled/rocked to sleep. Daytime sleeps are hard to come by, sometimes she won't sleep at all until late afternoon so if I manage to get her to sleep in my arms then that's where she stays, I won't risk putting her down and waking her up as she's so unsettled during the day.
    At night I feed her lying down and she drifts off next to me after she finishes her feed. If I have the energy I'll move her to the little cosleeper between DH and I, or I'll leave her where she is and sleep with one eye open.
    Sometimes swaddling works with her, but usually only at night.

    I know my 'methods' are inconsistent, but the way I see it the early weeks are about survival. I guess I'm just worried that I've shot myself in the foot and ruined my chances of a 'good sleeper'.
    Does anyone have any thoughts on this? Should I go with my gut instincts and ignore people?

  2. #2
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    Hi! Please don't feel bad about sleep decisions you have made. I went to a parent information session about sleep and brain development of bubs run by Nagala. They said it didn't hurt to hold/cuddle your baby as much as you like, in fact it helps develop your bond and feel secure. They also said that the baby's brain is not developed enough to form bad habits until much older than your bub. If you are in WA you can access free parent workshops through Ngala. I'm sure other states will offer something similar too. Good luck

  3. #3
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    go with your gut, you know your baby best.

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Renbird View Post
    Hi all,

    I'm so confused about what advice to follow in regards to my DD's sleep! We never really gave this much thought before she was born - all I really decided on was that I would hold her as often as I wanted to.

    Now DD is 4 weeks old and my head is spinning from all the unsolicited advice! The nurse and my mother think I should put her down and let her settle herself to sleep.
    My sister says do whatever you have to do in these early weeks, just as long as she sleeps.
    Google says swaddle, swaddle, swaddle.

    I know habits of newborns change so frequently, but currently bubs does need to be fed/cuddled/rocked to sleep. Daytime sleeps are hard to come by, sometimes she won't sleep at all until late afternoon so if I manage to get her to sleep in my arms then that's where she stays, I won't risk putting her down and waking her up as she's so unsettled during the day.
    At night I feed her lying down and she drifts off next to me after she finishes her feed. If I have the energy I'll move her to the little cosleeper between DH and I, or I'll leave her where she is and sleep with one eye open.
    Sometimes swaddling works with her, but usually only at night.

    I know my 'methods' are inconsistent, but the way I see it the early weeks are about survival. I guess I'm just worried that I've shot myself in the foot and ruined my chances of a 'good sleeper'.
    Does anyone have any thoughts on this? Should I go with my gut instincts and ignore people?

    Just do what works for you. Congratulations on your new bub. My youngest daughter is 4 months old and I still rock her to sleep then place her in her rocker or her cot. I rock her to sleep because I enjoy the closeness. I will deal with her sleep habits as a toddler when I get to that stage. Your baby will either be a good sleeper or not, no matter what you do. My 4 month old sleeps from around 9.30pm right through to about 7am most nights, nothing I did, she did that herself. That has been happening for about 2 months. My two eldest daughters were good sleepers but still woke up a couple of times a night for ages.

    I say trust your gut instincts but if anyone has an idea you like, try that...it's all trial and error I reckon. I tend to agree with your sister as well. What ever gets you some sleep lol.

  5. The Following User Says Thank You to Marchbundle For This Useful Post:

    Fi Poledancer  (19-07-2016)

  6. #5
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    A sleep 'problem' is only a 'problem' if it is bothering you. If you are happy with the way your DD's sleep is then there is no need to change things.
    Respectfully, the nurse and your mum can hold whatever opinions they like but ultimately you are your DD's parent so it is up to you to parent her in the best way you think you can. By all means listen to their advice as its great to hear other opinions but do what you feel comfortable with.
    If you would like to change your DD's sleeping habits you certainly can at whatever stage you think suits you and her best.
    It sounds like you are a very loving mum and doing a great job!

  7. #6
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    I'm a believer of the 4th trimester and that our babies so desperately need our closeness at that age. Hold & cuddle your bub if your happy to, it will pass before you know it. Soak in their beauty as they sleep peacefully.

    Would also suggest baby wearing for day sleeps.

    Worry about it in a few months IF sleep becomes a problem for you & your partner rather than those around you.

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    This is comforting to hear, can I send my mum to one of those workshops?! Lol

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    Quote Originally Posted by Marchbundle View Post
    Just do what works for you. Congratulations on your new bub. My youngest daughter is 4 months old and I still rock her to sleep then place her in her rocker or her cot. I rock her to sleep because I enjoy the closeness. I will deal with her sleep habits as a toddler when I get to that stage. Your baby will either be a good sleeper or not, no matter what you do. My 4 month old sleeps from around 9.30pm right through to about 7am most nights, nothing I did, she did that herself. That has been happening for about 2 months. My two eldest daughters were good sleepers but still woke up a couple of times a night for ages.

    I say trust your gut instincts but if anyone has an idea you like, try that...it's all trial and error I reckon. I tend to agree with your sister as well. What ever gets you some sleep lol.
    Very reassuring, thank you 😄

  10. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by MillieMollyMandy View Post
    A sleep 'problem' is only a 'problem' if it is bothering you. If you are happy with the way your DD's sleep is then there is no need to change things.
    Respectfully, the nurse and your mum can hold whatever opinions they like but ultimately you are your DD's parent so it is up to you to parent her in the best way you think you can. By all means listen to their advice as its great to hear other opinions but do what you feel comfortable with.
    If you would like to change your DD's sleeping habits you certainly can at whatever stage you think suits you and her best.
    It sounds like you are a very loving mum and doing a great job!
    So true, I never thought of it that way - I don't see it as a problem so I shouldn't treat it as one!
    Thank you ☺️

  11. #10
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    Go with what suits you. I did all the 'right' things. I researched non stop and made sure we were doing all the recommended things for good sleep habits. My DD had a good bed time routine from just a few weeks old. She's 4.5 months now and we've just called a sleep consultant to come and save us. She wakes up to 10 times a night and can't nap longer than half an hour during the day. It doesn't matter what you do half the time, your baby will be how it wants to be. If it's working for you roll with it and enjoy it.! The only regret I have is stressing about doing the right thing. It got us nowhere.

  12. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to A&S For This Useful Post:

    Fi Poledancer  (19-07-2016),Little Miss Sunshine  (07-07-2016)


 

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