Bradders and @tuxcat I'm hearing you both. My mind flips between sheer stress and worry about de not working and wondering what the end will really be like as this de cycle is my last hope to forcing myself to try and think more positively about de, that I have a better chance and that I have to remember this is just not the same as my oe cycles. But!!!!! This is really hard. When you've been knocked down over and over its hard to get back up and keep fighting. But in the words of dory we just gotta keep on swimming. De works for so many people. It's not a given no but it is increasing our chances. Cheering you both on!