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  1. #1
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    Default boy 4 punching walls/toys when angry. suggestions please!

    Hello mums,

    For the longest time my son was very emotional and hysterical. For Eg if he was building a train track and it came undone then he would cry hysterically, or if he wanted a cookie and there were none left he would cry and scream.... you'd think he had broken his arm or the world was ending. Childcare and us at home have been working hard on helping him redirect his emotions. Last week i noticed a difference. The crying and screaming has stopped now he just gets frustrated and sobs quietly and punches things. For Eg, in the toilet he dropped the toilet paper on the floor and flushed toilet before he realized the paper was on the floor. He got frustrated and punched the wall and started sobbing. In the evening his story toy ran out of batteries so he started to punch it and sob just a little (normally the whole street would hear his cry and scream). He is also starting to give us some silent treatment, door slamming and mumbling under his breath. I feel this is the next stage. I am gad he has moved on from the hysteria BUT this next stage is no acceptable at all. The poor kid needs an outlet, ways of dealing with frustration. He has a short fuse and needs techniques to deal with this for when he is frustrated and I'd live some ideas from mum of boys at this age or older. Thank you in advance.

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    Your poor ds seems to be struggling

    I hope you don't take this the wrong way, and i don't mean to sound disrespectful. ..but has He been assessed, or have childcare mentioned any concerns? These outbursts seem a bit on the extreme side of things to me. I have a 5yo ds and before i had him i worked as an early childhood educator.

    I agree its great the volume of his outbursts has decreased but his new methods are not acceptable.

    Can you provide a place for him to sit and calm down? Something like a small kids tent or teepee is perfect. He can go and collect his thoughts? Put in some pillows, a blanket and a small box of things like a book, egg timer, puppet, stress ball, teddy....things he can focus on to chill him out. I would avoid anything with working parts or electronics.

    Explain it to him that it's a place he can go so his body can calm down safely when he is feeling angry / frustrated to help his body calm down and can even use it as a rest place when he's not angry to just recharge a bit.

    When he gets frustrated role model acceptable behaviour "fred, i can see you're feeling angry. It's not ok/acceptable to punch your toys. Let's go help your body / does your body need to calm down in your tent, so we can talk about it."

    You could also read books about ways to cope when you're feeling.... or do puppets and role model appropriate behaviour. You could do a puppet show where a puppet has an outburst and another suggests playing in the tent to calm down, if you keep the story line similar he may become involved and you can make it fun where your puppet had the outburst and his puppet suggests the tent.


 

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