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  1. #1
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    Default With holding behaviour

    Sorry for the novel!
    My 3 year old Is terrified of doing poos. It's an ongoing battle that has been going on since the start of the year. She says it hurts her to poo and cries and doesn't go. She holds her poo for a good 5 days at least. Last time she went was last Thursday. I have been to the gp and was given movicol Jnr have tried it with no success it has not increased the bowl movements at All. The feeling of needing to go is there but she will just hold it and cry and clench until it's gone. This goes on for days until the urge can no longer be stopped.
    Has any one else been through this? It's not really constipation but after holding off all week it sort of gets their it's her behaviour. we done lots of positive reinforcement, praises, prizes high fives. Some yelling when it's just all to much (I know I know it's not the approach) nothing has helped!!! I'm at my wits end. She won't sit on the toilet just screams and carries on. I was thinking of buying an egg timer and getting her to sit on it every day for a few minutes even if nothing happens it might bring the feeling to go. She isn't scared of the toilet but scared of the bowl movement it's the same if she wears a nappy. I'm off to buy prunes tomorrow and make homemade prune juice to see if that helps. When it's getting towards the time she can no longer hold it and it's taking everything she has to stop it her behaviour is off to. She's clingy doesn't want to play or do anything. Just lays on the couch or bed all day and will not have energy or enthusiasm just wants to be next to me.
    I don't knew what else I can do. How to get over this fear and help her as it breaks my heart her being in pain and being scared

  2. #2
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    Default With holding behaviour

    DD was very similar at 3, it took 4 months having movicol daily (and lots of water) for her to be comfortable to poo, and then we kept her on it for another 2 months to make sure her bowel had time to heal if it had stretched. the only advice I can give you is to keep going, try not to worry when she doesn't poo and don't force the issue. Making an issue about it only made it worse for us.
    You have my sympathy it is hard work and sometimes a bit scary when they go for a week without going
    Last edited by Wheaty; 28-06-2016 at 01:41.

  3. #3
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    Thanks for that! I think I need to go back to the gp as the movicol dose she's on doesn't do anything. It's still been 6 days and nothing so I think we need to increase it

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    No worries I know how hard it is and wished I had someone to talk to/bounce ideas off when we were dealing with it. Definitely a good idea to see your gp about upping the dose, you should have seen some results by now. Our gp also told us to get DD to drink as much as possible, even if it's orange juice

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    maco  (07-08-2016)

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    Default With holding behaviour

    Sorry @maco my DD is only 1 but we had some constipation issues earlier which for a while made her scared of pooing and she screamed her head off every time she went it was awful. Our Paediatrician prescribed actilax liquid which is available over the counter. He prescribed it continuously for 2 months then a slow wean off. She started on 5ml per day but he was increasing it up to 10ml per day as required (she was only 6kg at the time) and was ok to put it up to 20ml if needed and then wean 1ml each week. He said it was a very slow process. We also gave her lots of pureed pear as she likes that and it helps move things along. Pear, plums, prunes, apricots are useful. You can try putting some pureed prunes into breakfast cereal each morning and really avoid anything that contributes to constipation. Hopefully if you can really get her stools softened a lot and more frequent movements it will be more comfortable and the fear will pass. Big hugs it's awful as you want to help but so hard
    ETA: also up water intake if you can as that will help with softening and moving things!

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    maco  (07-08-2016)

  8. #6
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    Kiwi fruit is a natural laxative.
    My dsd is 8 and she still has these problem, she still has acid ends as well due to holding it in for to long. We are finally on the other side of it now and it's not to often.
    I would try the prunes and natural laxatives to start off with, keep this up for a couple of months to give her bowels a chance to repair itself. Then slowly wean her off of them and see what happens

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  10. #7
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    Kiwi fruit is a natural laxative.
    My dsd is 8 and she still has these problem, she still has acid ends as well due to holding it in for to long. We are finally on the other side of it now and it's not to often.
    I would try the prunes and natural laxatives to start off with, keep this up for a couple of months to give her bowels a chance to repair itself. Then slowly wean her off of them and see what happens

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    Unhappy Witholding

    A case history - I first became aware of witholding / self-constipating when Mel was three - now here we are nearly ten years on and she still does it! I'm monitoring her bowels more than ever and it's making for an un-nice atmosphere in the house.
    What's causing the witholding (and other odd behaviors) is only just starting to become clear. An acquaintance in the psychiatric field suggested she may be autistic and conducted an unofficial test using some psychometric-type questionnaires. In his opinion, we both were - but she had a score of 50 on the spectrum! So now we're waiting for her to get a proper test from a psych. appointed via the health centre...

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    maco  (07-08-2016)

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    Because this has been going on a while I suspect her bowels are becoming sluggish. I think it's time to think about getting a referral to a gastro just to be sure everything is working well. My son had similar issues as a 3 year old and we were advised to use parachoc as if helps the poo "glide" through and as such does not cause pain. After doing this for a couple of months, the child gets used to pooing pain free and is less likely to hold it in. We did this under a gastroenterologist's advice.

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    maco  (07-08-2016)

  16. #10
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    We went through the same thing at the same age. It took forever and GP was hopeless. Psych couldn't help. Kiddo only went once a week. There is a book called 'it's no accident' which frankly, changed my life. I can't recommend it enough. We had to do an initial clean out with a high dose of laxatives. We prefer to use osmolax, the movicol in juice was always noticed. Our child did 22 poos in 40 hours. It was unbelievable. All large. The toddler belly disappeared overnight. Then did ongoing low dose osmolax for 7 months and weaned off it slowly. The book explains it all and why they can withhold, the effects on the bowel and how it can affect the bladder, etc.

  17. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Pandamonium For This Useful Post:

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