Feeling resentful | Page 2 | Bub Hub
+ Reply to Thread
Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 11 to 15 of 15
  1. #11
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    my house
    Posts
    17,579
    Thanks
    1,386
    Thanked
    7,188
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by KitiK View Post
    Thanks @Tinydancer. My mum also left my dad when us 3 were early teens - I know we survived, but it wasnt ideal. She worked full time and had financially struggled since to the point us kids went without 'needs' a lot. I know she regrets a lot of things - particularly missing out on childhood milestones or important events bc she had to work to pay the bills, but I know she did the best she could and love her to bits. I have no respect for my father and don't have anything to do with him. In my early 20s I re established a relationship with him, but last year after a very strained decade decided I did not want him or his angst and negativity in my life. Should have been a red flag to DH.

    I just don't want to be repeating the pattern iykwim. I have no doubt all of 'my issues' are interconnected, I just feel like DH takes 0 responsibility for the way he has behaved or its impact on our lives - mine in particular as no one else seems to be impacted!?
    You already said that you and your children go without anyway because he is getting what he wants.

    To me, a relationship is about compromise and sacrifice. He needs to learn he can't have what he wants at the drop of a hat.

    I would find it hard to stay in a relationship with someone who thought they were more important than anyone else and knew that their kids were missing out because of his wants.

  2. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to BigRedV For This Useful Post:

    delirium  (14-06-2016),KitiK  (13-06-2016)

  3. #12
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Posts
    1,638
    Thanks
    3,374
    Thanked
    949
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Yes missing out - but not going without (ie: not able to participate in out of hours activities, but not going without necessities - food shelter). It makes the decision difficult because I do not want my kids to experience a similar childhood to mine (going without) and think maybe I just have to suck it up for a few more years....

  4. #13
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    22,674
    Thanks
    6,141
    Thanked
    16,642
    Reviews
    8
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 postsRuby Star - 15,000 postsDiamond Star - 20,000 posts
    Awards:
    Bubhub Blogger - Thanks100 Posts in a week
    Why does he get depressed when you express how unhappy you are? Sounds like manipulation, whether he intends it to be or not. He's a father now, his kids should come first.

    I agree with BRV, you are all already missing out. I'm close to someone that left their partner for similar reasons and she has told me that despite being on a lower income that she's actually better off as he's not spending the money all the time.

  5. The Following User Says Thank You to delirium For This Useful Post:

    KitiK  (14-06-2016)

  6. #14
    SuperGranny's Avatar
    SuperGranny is offline Worlds best grandma! Winner 2012 - Most Helpful Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    sunshine coast qld
    Posts
    6,008
    Thanks
    4,395
    Thanked
    2,562
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    hi kitiK, I wonder if you could find some self-help books in your library. I feel you need to work on your own self worth, and heal from your childhood, and then you will know what you need to do. You didn't find what you needed with counselling, perhaps reading about others expierences will be a better guide for you. People/ children can have everything they need in food and shelter and toys and clothes, but still be missing out on real love and acceptance, and self esteem. hugs, marie.

  7. The Following User Says Thank You to SuperGranny For This Useful Post:

    Redcorset  (14-06-2016)

  8. #15
    Join Date
    Mar 2014
    Posts
    1,638
    Thanks
    3,374
    Thanked
    949
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    ...
    Last edited by KitiK; 15-06-2016 at 13:20.


 

Similar Threads

  1. Feeling alone
    By InvisibleWoman in forum General depression and blues
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 21-10-2015, 07:58
  2. Is what I'm feeling ott?
    By Hasselhoff in forum Issues with Family Members
    Replies: 30
    Last Post: 09-10-2015, 19:08
  3. Resentful of DP
    By anonanon15 in forum Issues with Family Members
    Replies: 42
    Last Post: 19-07-2015, 21:09

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Free weekly newsletters | Sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
sales & new stuffsee all
LCF Fun Languages Australia
Your chance to win the perfect tool to help you reinforce your child's language learning at home with our unique online learning resource, Babelzone! Enrol and pay online for any Term 4 Fun Languages club in Australia by Monday 10th October 2017.
Visit our website to enrol and find out how to enter
featured supporter
Cots on Bubhub
Looking to buy a cot or bassinet? :: Cot safety checklist :: Local or online nursery shops
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!