But yep when I did criminal law we studied juries and attitudes to rape victims. Fascinating and frightening.
Ok, so it isn't exactly like this, this is a very simplified analogy, but it works for the purposes. Say 2 people were sharing their teapots, and tea collection, discussing how wonderful another person's teapot looked and how they loved a good cup of tea, and extolling all the virtues of tea, and how wonderful high tea was, and so on and so forth. Would it then be right for one of those people to automatically assume that the other person wants tea, and force a cuppa on them? Yes, completely imperfect analogy, but I am sure you can work around the gaps and issues this analogy presents.
Even if consent is given, it can then be refused at any time.
Men are not prey to their "base instincts" any more than women are. In fact if a woman claimed the reason she raped a male was because he was walking around with skinny jeans/no shirt/a singlet/shorts, there is no way that would be viewed as an appropriate response, and the male would not in anyway be held accountable for walking around in whatever it was that he was wearing as a reason that he was raped.
Assault is about power and control. The view that the woman is somehow accountable for her assault also leads to issues with men being assaulted in terms of reporting and being believed, etc.
Just because a woman does not act or dress in the same manner as you does not mean she is "asking for it." Some people are naturally flirtatious. Some people are just naturally nice, or trying to not offend the person (I've seen men get cranky quite quickly when a woman who has literally done no more than smile and exchange polite pleasantries has refused a drink/dance/date). Accepting drinks/food/gifts does not mean that they want that to go any further. Some women dress for themselves (shocking thought I know). This is not about what the woman has "done," but why some men see that they have the right to react the way they do.
As for having a gawk I don't necessarily think verbal permission is necessary. In the ops case I think 2 ladies taking risqué photos in public implies permission has been given to others present to have a gawk.
I think it's understandable and ok to make that assumption.
There is no victim blaming in this particular case as there was no victim or perpretrator. A couple of ladies put on a show and a couple of guys had a gawk. No one was hurt (apart from the OPs DH).
Pregnant for the first-time?
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