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  1. #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by cheeeeesecake View Post
    I cant find the comment,but I think you said they would be up at 6am? My kids are early risers, often up by 6.30, so we just do 6.30pm bedtime. Can you shift bedtime a bit earlier those days if she is usually in bed late? The newborn will adjust to anything, my 3rd baby was up & shipped around all over the place because she had to be I just made sure she had opportunity to sleep in the capsule or baby carrier or at home when we were home (which wasnt often!) I think it would be your school child who might find it difficult, but she would adjust I think. Perhaps that monday could be an easy night - dinner in front of the TV or something & early to bed.
    I'm quite strict on bed time, it's always 7pm and my DD always wakes up at 7.15, I'd rather not adjust her great sleeping patterns iykwim (might sound selfish to some but it's what works well for my DD)

  2. #42
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    When I had my 2nd baby, I found it really tough to lose the 1:1 time with my first. We were used to spending lots of special time together. But the first has a sibling now, plus one on the way, so 1:1 time just does not happen all the time. It's a hard adjustment to get used to, but it becomes your new normal xx

  3. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by SummerFun View Post
    I didn't intend my original post to sound like I had a gripe or issues with my DSD, I was genuinely wanting to know what others in similar situations do and what the best thing is for all involved. I'm not having a go at you btw, I just didn't want my OP to be misinterpreted.

    Yes DF actively helping would help with the situation but I don't know how to make that happen. He would just constantly drop DSD to school late if they weren't ready to leave on time which in my eyes is not ok. Yes I could scream & yell at him about it but I just don't think that will fix the problem.
    @SummerFun Let him take her in late or sort it out himself, leave that responsibility on his shoulders. You are going to have enough on your plate with the newborn. If you are going to be woken at 6am then you'll have to go to bed earlier, I can't really see a way around that. Your sleep schedule is going to be all out of whack with the bub anyway. Bug hugs, it is hard. Myself and my partner both work full time and I have a 90 minute commute each way plus two different daycare drop offs (instead of one) when my bub arrives. My son likes to be up at 530am *facepalm*

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  5. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by 2 girls 1 boy View Post
    I don't think it will affect your newborn as such, he or she will have young kids in the house from day one. Unless you are going to make your combined children to be quite from day dot the new born will sleep through the noise or wake up for a feed and go back to sleep.
    It's the way it goes when you have more than one child and a new born in the house.
    I am understanding of your situation and think it will be hard on your dsd to be leaving the house that early if your df does want to keep her for that long however now I think about it my kids have been in before school care from that time since the 2nd week of prep. So it can be done and they get use to it.

    With school clothes - if you can not get them washed and dried in time on the weekend can you just buy a extra set of school clothes to keep on that weekend? That way you always have a set at your house? It won't cost you that much to get one shirt and pants?

    Time management - in the morning your daughter will wake up early, she can watch tv for a extra hour. Obviously the girls get along? They might like being able to get ready together.

    Losing time with your daughter - I actually find that a bit upsetting that you see it that way. You have her all during the week by herself, you dad is part of your family. You have a newborn on the way sorry you won't get one on one time for a while. Make a day during the week your one on one time. What about the other weekend the step daughter is at her mums? Can you make that one on one time?

    I see both sides of this - I totally understand your side of the extra person and stress. But in realty one more doesn't make that much of a issue. Your making a lunch anyway what's one more? It takes 2 more seconds.
    What does you df do now in the mornings? Could having all her stuff like school clothes shoes socks bag ready in the lounge room on Sunday night work out easier? So she sees it and knows she has to get dressed?
    With the school uniform she will be going to private school (her mums choice) so it's not leggings & Tshirt kinda thing, it's a pinafore, shirt, tights, knitted jumper etc that would A cost us a fortune and B then be sent back at her mums when her mum collects her from school on a Monday and I guarantee it will not get returned to us. It's tricky!

    The girls getting ready in the morning already makes things take so so much longer.

    Yes I'm aware I'll have another baby soon enough and kids have to share/adjust but my 2 biological children will be 5yrs apart not 6months like DD & DSD so I don't really think the two are compatible.

  6. #45
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    Sorry,I keep adding things as I think of them. We leave home just after 7.30 5 days a week for school drop off. I have lunches ready to go, uniform/ clothes laid out in the loungeroom for the kids to put on as soon as they get up, & I make a quick brekky that can be eaten in the car on the drive to school, usually something I've prepped the night before. I get up 15ish mins before everyone else - no matter how little sleep I had the night before - to have a quick shower, get dressed, & start the day with a clear head. Super organisation really helps with those mornings.

  7. #46
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    I don't know if I'm being sensitive but a few people replying are saying I'll just have to adjust to missing out on one on one time with my DD once the baby is here yet I'm labelled a b@tch for suggesting my DF misses 1.5hrs with his DD every second weekend. It feels like I'm expected to sacrifice but he's not? Is that the gist? I may be reading into it wrong

  8. #47
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    Default Step Child Starting School - Help!

    We pick up my step son Friday nights and he goes home Sunday's, we cannot get him to school on a Monday morning because that would make three drops offs between us getting to work, care and one to school already. It's an early start for her to to have to concentrate at school all day as well. I think it's totally reasonable for you to take her home Sunday's instead.

    Edit to add- I feel for you, as a step parent were not supposed to ever feel exasperated by the situation because "we knew they had kids blah blah blah" and everyone who isn't a step parent usually has a giant opinion on it. I hope you come up with a solution, it doesn't sound like she would really be missing time with him anyway seeing as it's you who gets left to do most of the parenting duties with her, with the getting ready etc.
    Last edited by PipersMummy; 08-06-2016 at 14:29.

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  10. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by SummerFun View Post
    With the school uniform she will be going to private school (her mums choice) so it's not leggings & Tshirt kinda thing, it's a pinafore, shirt, tights, knitted jumper etc that would A cost us a fortune and B then be sent back at her mums when her mum collects her from school on a Monday and I guarantee it will not get returned to us. It's tricky!
    If she has 1 uniform that she is wearing on a Friday and then another uniform at your house, then the uniform she was wearing on the Friday goes in the wash after school, and if its not dry on time, the 1 already in your house she wears on Monday.
    The 1 still drying goes back into her drawer. So there is always 1 uniform at your house. Both dont go back to her Mums house with her.

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  12. #49
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    Quote Originally Posted by monroe78 View Post
    If she has 1 uniform that she is wearing on a Friday and then another uniform at your house, then the uniform she was wearing on the Friday goes in the wash after school, and if its not dry on time, the 1 already in your house she wears on Monday.
    The 1 still drying goes back into her drawer. So there is always 1 uniform at your house. Both dont go back to her Mums house with her.
    Ok yep I understand what you mean then.

    Unfortunately we don't have a spare few hundred $ to spend on a second uniform

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  14. #50
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    Quote Originally Posted by SummerFun View Post
    I don't know if I'm being sensitive but a few people replying are saying I'll just have to adjust to missing out on one on one time with my DD once the baby is here yet I'm labelled a b@tch for suggesting my DF misses 1.5hrs with his DD every second weekend. It feels like I'm expected to sacrifice but he's not? Is that the gist? I may be reading into it wrong
    Not at all hun. 1:1 time goes out the window all around,whether it be with dd or dsd. I think though, because your dd lives with you 7 night a week (I presume?) & dsd for 3 nights a fortnight, PP were just suggesting that that extra time at your home is valuable for dsd. It's nice for her to bond with the new baby,too. But I defintely also see your point about wanting to take dsd home sunday night - as I said previously, I would ask for the first 3 months for dh to take dsd home on the sunday. If it is working beautifully, dh might feel like that is better anyway.

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