I have an 8.5 month old and I want to preface everything by saying I think she's the best baby in the world but at the moment, sleeping is a complete disaster.
She has never really put herself to sleep. I either rock her, put her on the breast or even just hug her and once she's asleep, I put her in her bed. But recently, this has stopped working. After a few nights of her waking within seconds of me putting her into her bed (a bassinet right next to our bed where I can touch her) and screaming until I picked her up, I started just letting her sleep next to me in our bed. We didn't know what else to do, my partner has to get up at 5 for work and needs sleep and neither of us can stand to let her cry because we're worried it's not good for her mental and emotional development.
Then the last couple of nights, she has started waking lots even when I let her sleep next to me. The only way to calm her is to give her the breast.
At the same time, she has virtually quit having naps during the day. I would soothe her to sleep (either bf or hug) and then put her in her crib in her room and she used to have 2 decent naps a day for around 1-2 hours each. But now, as soon as I put her down, she's awake and screaming.
A lot has happened for her recently, she's become a master crawler, started standing, sounds like she's saying words etc. She only has 2 teeth but maybe she's getting more.
The only other thing I can think of is the introduction of solids. We started trying to introduce solids at 6 months, but she was not very interested. Anytime we tried to feed her, she started screaming and even when hungry all she wanted was milk. In the last couple of weeks, she has started to be more receptive, and especially if instead of making separate meals for her, I just cook a little extra and we share our dinners whilst we're eating with her. But then, going to the toilet has become a monumental event. She screams every time and then cries for a while afterwards. Her poo is soft though, kind of like a lump of soft clay? I don't know if that's normal or not.
So sometimes when she wakes during the night, it seems to be because she needs to go to the toilet. She cries and strains, but almost never actually goes at night. So that goes on for 5-10 minutes until she calms down and goes back to sleep, only to be repeated like an hour later some nights.
I'm getting so tired. Today I drove through a red light, put on my jacket backwards and didn't notice until I couldn't get the other arm in and I can't seem to remember anything. But we needed food.
My poor partner is not much better.
Please tell me is this normal? Do we just need to harden up and stop complaining? Or are we doing everything wrong?
I don't know anything about babies. We have no family nearby.