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  1. #1
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    Unhappy Adhd

    Nine year old DS was diagnosed with mild ADHD a year ago. We were seeing a psychologist for a few months to help with some anxiety issues he was having but have since ceased going because the anxiety has settled down.

    He can not stay on task at all. With anything. He is making home life unbearable. He needs prompting with every task. Mornings are the worst as I have to ask him over and over to get dressed, brush his teeth etc. He wont make himself breakfast. If the tv is on I have no hope. We have a rule that the tv doesn't go on until he is completely ready but every morning I wake up and he his already up watching tv and not ready.

    It seems his school work is slipping now and I have a meeting with his teacher to discuss what is happening. He forgets everything, from his drink bottle to bringing home and handing in his homework. Even when he can see the other kids handing their's in he still gets so distracted that he doesn't get up and hand his in. His teacher has also said that he is very distracted most of the time.

    He is defiant with me and disrespectful, but he seems to be well behaved and compliant with other people including DH. He is also very impulsive especially in social situations for e.g. he can't help but put his hands on other kids - pushing, flicking etc, just annoying them in general. He also makes silly noises and says silly words over and over when he is bored like if we are in the car.

    Sometimes i wonder if he does have ADHD, because things like TV and the ipad can hold his attention for hours if I let him and he seems to be well behaved for other adults, almost like he is able to control it if he wants to..

    I am going to speak with his teacher and make a decision about whether or not to go back to the paediatrician to look into some kind of treatment.

    Just tell me I'm not alone in this!!

  2. #2
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    Your not alone.

    Give me a few mins and I will post properly.

  3. #3
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    You're not alone. The focus on "TV" or IPAD and phasing everything else out like they can't hear anything or see anything except for that is a sign of a child / person with ADHD.

    Everything you described about what's happening with your child sounds to me like ADHD. Children can be different for other people. They hide their true nature. A common thing of a child with ADHD is to try to appear "normal" around other people and then when they get home they lose it because they've cooped it up all day. At home they feel safe and like they can be who they really are.

    I have ADHD. So maybe I can give you some insight into what it's like.. and to how he's probably functioning. I am easily distracted... I should be getting ready but I hear a message pop up on the computer... instead of spending 2 minutes reading it and getting ready again I get lost and then all of a sudden I'm late. I LOVE being on the computer. I do Facebook, games, bubhub, read stuff. When I'm on it I black everything else out. Sometimes people talk to me and I even answer them but I have no recollection of what's gone on.

    I have a conversation with someone.. sometimes (some days are worse than others) I will phase out half way through what people are saying and I have to come up with a response. It's actually quite embarrassing.

    I lose stuff all the time. I did as a kid as well. My mum told me that one year I lost 12 lunchboxes in 1 term. As an adult I put stuff down in random places and forget where I've put them. An example, I once called my husband in tears because I couldn't find my car keys. I had opened the car and put the kids and the pram in the car but had no idea where the car keys were ( I had obvioulsy used them to open the car). They turned out to be in the pram. My husband talked calmly and suggested places and eventually I found them.

    As a child I would go to school with my hair unbrushed, my pants on back to front. I brushed my teeth every now and then when I remembered. (I didn't have the best parents so they didn't really make sure I was dressed properly).

    Sorry for the essay... I now have a child who looks like they may have it as well or be on the autism spectrum. There are many parents going through the same hell. Take him back to talk to someone about options. Try to cut back on preservatives and sugar as much as you can. This can help with children with ADHD.

    Good luck

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to Renesme For This Useful Post:

    bubbasmum  (23-05-2016)

  5. #4
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    Thanks for that insight @Renesme. It's good to know I'm not alone.

  6. #5
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    I have 2 kids with adhd. So I might be able to help

    Is he on meds?

    Things that might help

    # Ipads are often used as part of a ot plan to help add kids to be still in social situations. So being able to be engrossed in the tv and I pad is normal for adhd kids. Use it to your advantage as a calm down tool. Car trips, Dr surgeries. Parties. Etc.

    Have morning routine chart. A step by step guide to what he needs to be do by what time.
    Limit distractions. TV. Etc. If it's on turn it off.
    Be consistent.
    Have realist goals and expectations. Waking up to him being ready and watching TV. Is not realistic for now.

    As for school stuff. That sounds totally normal for a kid with adhd that doesn't have extra routines and tools in place for him.
    The best thing you could do for him and his teachers and for that matter you is go see a occupational therapists. They will be your best friend.
    As a rough ideas to help in the classroom
    *A hot water bottle (filled with cold water) on his seat to increase his movement for body without big movement to distract his classmates.
    *Putting his pencil case on the floor for extra movements.
    *wearing ear buds headphones to help with distracting noise.
    *a weighted lap band/pillow
    *a window box to cover distracting things on the page so he can concentrate on the part of the page he needs too.

    You definitely need to go back and get some extra help. There is a whole world of help out there. Use it.
    Whole it won't be a magic cure all. It will help you understand him better and help him work in a world that isn't set up for him.

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    bubbasmum  (23-05-2016)

  8. #6
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    Thanks @LoveLivesHere.
    Those are some really great suggestions. We have routine charts in place but he even forgets about them (but i haven't been very consistent with it either tbh).


 

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