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  1. #21
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    I think bubs make us all sooky, the birth is just a reason... My birth went as planned, very clinical, on time (Cs) but I still get emotional too over many things. I think it's just one if those things that being a mum brings, the birth is just another element that many people have various plans about, my friends in the 'trade' so to speak joke the more detailed the birth plan the more likely u are to need every intervention known to man.,..so I had a simple plan, lots of drugs, healthy Bub, hopefully civil time of day ( for optimal staffing) and my dh and ob there! Got all of them! And I'm still emotional!

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    turquoisecoast  (16-05-2016)

  3. #22
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    Dd is two and even though her delivery wasn't traumatic, I still get upset. I had an elective CS for breech presentation but my spinal failed and ended up under GA. I feel totally ripped off and get angry at myself for not trying to turn her. I missed out on the first cry and the 'you have a little girl'. I just had Ds last week (another elective CS) and watching him being delivered was freaking amazing!!

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    turquoisecoast  (17-05-2016)

  5. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by turquoisecoast View Post
    I admit the calm birth classes we did kind of set me up for this experience I wanted that didn't happen and I'm a bit sad about that but I think I've made peace with that now. I realise now getting so caught up and attracted to an ideal experience was a bit naive.
    I was just thinking more about this kind of thing. I think a lot of us feel disappointed because we had the goal and expectation of natural birth (or breastfeeding, etc, but I'll focus on birth). Because in order to make it through birth one does need to be mentally prepared, focused, confident, and believe that one can do it. Which creates an awkward cognitive dissonance because we need to simultaneously be thinking "Yes, I can do this! I will do this!" but also "It's totally ok if I can't do this, because it's not 100% in my control".
    So it's no wonder that we end up with conflicting and confusing feelings.
    I'm not sure how to overcome this either! I think it would be good for midwives/birth classes to address this more though.

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    JustJaq  (17-05-2016)

  7. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by deku View Post
    I was just thinking more about this kind of thing. I think a lot of us feel disappointed because we had the goal and expectation of natural birth (or breastfeeding, etc, but I'll focus on birth). Because in order to make it through birth one does need to be mentally prepared, focused, confident, and believe that one can do it. Which creates an awkward cognitive dissonance because we need to simultaneously be thinking "Yes, I can do this! I will do this!" but also "It's totally ok if I can't do this, because it's not 100% in my control".
    So it's no wonder that we end up with conflicting and confusing feelings.
    I'm not sure how to overcome this either! I think it would be good for midwives/birth classes to address this more though.
    I agree!

    there was so much focus on the nuts and bolts of birth and not much on the aftermath and the emotions you might be feeling. I guess because this aspect varies so much for each individual it's much harder to address but some kind of discussion would be good. although I'm sure they probably did touch on it when they went through variations of labour, but it's not something you can really comprehend until you've gone through it.

    I was determined to make BF work as I felt a little let down by the birth experience. we had some issues early on and I did almost throw in the towel but I kept trying and eventually it clicked for us both. not sure how I would've felt if BF hadn't worked out. my dh was quite concerned I'd fall into pnd if BF didn't happen as he saw I was let down after the birth.


 

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