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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    I wouldn't at that age as I think 16 (for the girl) is far to young to be spending a large chunk of time thinking about and/or taking part in sex. And that's what's going to be going on if there is a sleep over -they won't just be playing Monopoly.

    I definitely wouldn't be allowing it without chatting with the other child's parents.
    Ummmm it depends on the teenager.
    At 16 I had a boyfriend who used to stay over.. we even went away for a week together. We used to talk, watch movies etc. We were together for 5 months and we never had s.x. I actually think most smart teenagers wouldn't have s.x in their parents house. It'd be awkward.

    If kids want to take the plunge they're going to do it unless you chain them to a chair inside your house. All you can do is explain safe s.x and tell them it should be for when they're older and more mature.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BH-KatiesMum View Post
    Honestly - let your son and his girlfriend approach them. They are adults (well, nearly) and are the ones wanting this relationship. This is something THEY need to do ... Not you.

    Tell your son that its ok with you provided that it is ok with her parents (and then after they tell you that it is, get their details and contact them to make sure)

    If they want this responsibility and to be treated as adults, this is part of that.

    best wishes
    I think this is the best advice I've read on here and totally agree

  3. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by BH-KatiesMum View Post
    Honestly - let your son and his girlfriend approach them. They are adults (well, nearly) and are the ones wanting this relationship. This is something THEY need to do ... Not you.

    Tell your son that its ok with you provided that it is ok with her parents (and then after they tell you that it is, get their details and contact them to make sure)

    If they want this responsibility and to be treated as adults, this is part of that.

    best wishes
    I agree with this. My eldest son is 21 and this is exactly what I did. It was up to him and his girlfriend to make sure it was ok with both sets of parents.

    I always confirmed with the girl's parents. To be honest by the time they hit the sleep over stage I already had met and had the contact details of the girl's parents anyway!

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    Quote Originally Posted by BH-KatiesMum View Post
    Honestly - let your son and his girlfriend approach them. They are adults (well, nearly) and are the ones wanting this relationship. This is something THEY need to do ... Not you.

    Tell your son that its ok with you provided that it is ok with her parents (and then after they tell you that it is, get their details and contact them to make sure)

    If they want this responsibility and to be treated as adults, this is part of that.

    best wishes
    Yep, this. It's how I will be approaching things when my kids get to that stage. If they are old enough to make the decision to be intimate, they are old enough to talk to their parents about it.

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    So sleepover happened. All parents on same page. The kids both reassured us that they are not quite ready for the full intimacy stage just yet but will tell us when they are. They both sat down and talked to us yesterday afternoon and talked about their relationship. I'm impressed by their maturity and openness to let us know where they are in their relationship.
    Thank you to all for you advise and comments. Im glad I posted here because no else I know has teenagers.

  6. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to lese82 For This Useful Post:

    BH-KatiesMum  (15-05-2016),Californication  (15-05-2016),PomPoms  (15-05-2016),SuperGranny  (18-05-2016),TheGooch  (15-05-2016),~Marigold~  (15-05-2016)

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    Glad it's all good. You sound like you have a great relationship with your son

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    Quote Originally Posted by BH-KatiesMum View Post
    Glad it's all good. You sound like you have a great relationship with your son
    Its taken a while but yes I like to think we do.. I don't have that sort of relationship with my parents so I'm glad our kids can come to us and talk to us about anything

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    Quote Originally Posted by lese82 View Post
    So sleepover happened. All parents on same page. The kids both reassured us that they are not quite ready for the full intimacy stage just yet but will tell us when they are. They both sat down and talked to us yesterday afternoon and talked about their relationship. I'm impressed by their maturity and openness to let us know where they are in their relationship.
    Thank you to all for you advise and comments. Im glad I posted here because no else I know has teenagers.
    What a lovely post! I really hope that in 5 years time when my DD is 17 I will have the same relationship you have with your son.

    I would also let the sleep over happen if both parents were in agreement


 

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