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  1. #1
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    Default Sometimes im happier when DH isnt around

    Anyone else find this with their significant other.
    DH never wants to do anything. Sometimes I look forward to knowing hes going to training or working late cos ill take the kids out for a picnic for dinner or something.

    DH never wants to do little things like a picnic in the park or going to the food court for dinner instead of ordering in or Going for a drive to a new park on the other side of town. Little things you know that gets us out of the house or mixes the routine of life up.

    I have never said it before but sometimes I find him boring.

    He says I over share and fret about little things. YES, I do. Hes just soooooo relaxed, I get nothing from him. Now I'm worried about sharing anything with him cos he says I talk AT him. Thing is he'll tell me I'm giving him the silent treatment cos I'm not talking to him.


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    Nothing better than 8pm on a night when hubby is away! Kids in bed, TV to myself, I can do whatever I want without having to faff around worrying about someone else. I love my alone time

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    Maybe some couples counselling might help with the communication?

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    Has he always been this way or is it recent? I am assuming the latter or you prob wouldn't have fallen in love and be married...??

    As PP suggested maybe some couples counselling would help, I know it can be hard to have serious conversations about the relationship and counselling would force you both to talk openly. If it is a serious issue for you that is, hard to tell from your post.

    If it's more of an observation than a big issue, maybe some compromise is in order. Once a week you make a commitment he has to attend - ie picnic or movie or dinner out etc. then you leave him have some alone time the rest of the weekend, some people need alone time even in a healthy relationship.

    I know my DH likes to stay at home and potter in the yard on wknds, he travels for work so isn't interested in driving around on the weekend. We do get out, but I am mindful t let him have a day (or even half day) to just do what he wants at home. Especially if it means I can get out alone for an hour or 2...

    When he is away I like the freedom I have to eat what i want when I want, clean when I want, watch what I want etc. but after about 2 nights I am bored and want him home.

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    I think I am a little like your DH. I could bum around at home and not be bored.

    I think I am worse when anxiety/depression set in a bit more.

    Not sure if this is true for him or not.

    I recognise it in myself so I tend to 'force' myself to do things. Does he say why he does not want to/like to do/initiate these things?

    As for the second part of 'oversharing' - I do that all the time. DH is patient though. I think he tunes out lol.

    Could he be right about the fretting/oversharing? Maybe it is overwhelming?

    Relationships are flipping hard work.


 

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