Closed Thread
Page 3 of 40 FirstFirst 1234513 ... LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 400
  1. #21
    Join Date
    Aug 2013
    Location
    Adelaide, SA
    Posts
    2,113
    Thanks
    667
    Thanked
    695
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Awards:
    100 Posts in a week
    Maybe a better question might be, "When does it become okay to voice your judgement to the person concerned"?

  2. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Catzilla For This Useful Post:

    amyd  (12-05-2016),smallpotatoes  (13-05-2016),VicPark  (12-05-2016)

  3. #22
    Join Date
    May 2013
    Posts
    7,836
    Thanks
    5,052
    Thanked
    4,437
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 17/4/15100 Posts in a week
    Quote Originally Posted by Catzilla View Post
    Maybe a better question might be, "When does it become okay to voice your judgement to the person concerned"?
    This is very true!

    My initial question when is it okay to judge as the other thread featured many people who sounded like they didn't think judging was ever valid or they don't ever judge others, which I found an interesting concept.

    But I agree with you, we pretty much all judge whether we admit to it or not, so yes for sure, the question should be about when is it okay to voice it.... Because we all judge!

  4. The Following User Says Thank You to A-Squared For This Useful Post:

    Catzilla  (12-05-2016)

  5. #23
    Join Date
    Apr 2014
    Location
    Roleystone
    Posts
    1,710
    Thanks
    2,383
    Thanked
    1,904
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Catzilla View Post
    Maybe a better question might be, "When does it become okay to voice your judgement to the person concerned"?
    Yes, I think that is the question. My answer would be - when someone is actually in danger from another persons actions. And real danger - not some ridiculous perceived 'danger' because they're not doing something the way you would do it.

    Example: Do I judge people who leave their dog outside all day and night, barely interact with them and they are basically a 'resident' at their house, but not part of their family? Yep. Should I say something? No. The dog might not be living as happy a life as my dogs and I would feel sad for them, but if they have food, water and shelter, it's actually not my business to say anything. If the same person lets their very young child play outside, unsupervised next to this same dog, chewing a bone tied to a chain - do I judge? Yep. Should I say something? Yep.

    I have to say though, from the perspective of someone who had exactly zero to do with children and no friends with children up until this point, the "Mummy shaming" I've since discovered exists is the most gobsmacking, ridiculous pile of dung I've ever come across! Good grief, mums shaming OTHER MUMS no matter what they do. The sorts of things I've seen in person and all over the internet have left me speechless. There seems to be some warped idea that mums should be completely perfect, omniscient people and anything less is totally unacceptable. It's just sad.

  6. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to HillDweller For This Useful Post:

    babyno1onboard  (12-05-2016),Tiny Dancer  (13-05-2016)

  7. #24
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Posts
    5,937
    Thanks
    911
    Thanked
    4,463
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    I haven't read through, but honestly I think it's the word choice used. "Judging" can never and will never have positive outcomes.
    There's a difference between having an opinion, and educating someone in their maybe not so good opinion, and judging.
    Saying "I think that this person should not be giving her child Coke because the child doesn't need it and she will be battling obesity" is an opinion. Telling the mother in a constructive way, that's education.
    But saying "she's a bad mum, her children should be taken off her. How dare she give her baby Coke", well that's judging and it's not okay.

  8. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to MrsTugs For This Useful Post:

    A-Squared  (12-05-2016),Californication  (12-05-2016),Renn  (12-05-2016)

  9. #25
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Posts
    1,854
    Thanks
    995
    Thanked
    554
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by SJ565 View Post
    At the end of the day, we all try to do what we think is best. One person's best is not the same as the next persons best.
    It's human nature to form an opinion, and judge. But I try to keep my ideas to myself, especially if it doesn't affect me or hurt anyone.
    Exactly this!
    Good god if i voiced every single opinion i had, i would have no friends!
    And another thing is that, no one else truly knows another persons situation, everyone has their own story to tell, and rather than people constantly judging one another, just worry about yourselves.

    Glasshouses, people.

  10. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to MrsMummaButterfly For This Useful Post:

    A-Squared  (12-05-2016),HillDweller  (12-05-2016)

  11. #26
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Posts
    3,757
    Thanks
    1,205
    Thanked
    2,112
    Reviews
    15
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I judge/form an opinion in my head on most things, I think we all do naturally. But I keep my judgement/opinion to myself a lot more these days (thanks to BH actually) and really only discuss my judgey comments with my husband at home. Sometimes I do let rip if it's something I'm passionate about, but I always feel super bad afterwards because at the end of the day, there are definitely people out there who wouldn't agree with how I parent.

    However, I think when the safety of a child or illegal practices are taking place people should be allowed to judge and openly.

  12. #27
    Join Date
    May 2013
    Posts
    7,836
    Thanks
    5,052
    Thanked
    4,437
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 17/4/15100 Posts in a week
    [QUOTE=Anjalee;8478039.

    However, I think when the safety of a child or illegal practices are taking place people should be allowed to judge and openly.[/QUOTE]

    This is where the 'problem' with judging lies. People have varying levels to which they see 'safety' some parent let kids walk to school, stay home at certain ages etc, but other parents would see big of those things as unsafe

  13. The Following User Says Thank You to A-Squared For This Useful Post:

    smallpotatoes  (12-05-2016)

  14. #28
    Join Date
    Feb 2015
    Posts
    2,051
    Thanks
    2,300
    Thanked
    1,387
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    I judge people all the time!!! I try my hardest to put myself in their shoes first and take into consideration cultural, educational, financial, religious, etc differences. Of course I still don't know everything about someone situation so also keep that in the back of my mind. I don't really judge people from media reports as they are usually skewed to create headlines.

    I rarely voice my judgement to someone's face unless there is a serious threat to someone's safety. I will often voice my judgments to DF and we have a little vent about in private.

    From a parenting perspective i often judge (to DF) friends and family who only feed their kids unhealthy food and those who don't follow car seat safety standards.

  15. #29
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Posts
    3,757
    Thanks
    1,205
    Thanked
    2,112
    Reviews
    15
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 posts
    Quote Originally Posted by A-Squared View Post
    This is where the 'problem' with judging lies. People have varying levels to which they see 'safety' some parent let kids walk to school, stay home at certain ages etc, but other parents would see big of those things as unsafe
    Yeah that's a good point!

  16. #30
    Join Date
    Apr 2012
    Posts
    12,708
    Thanks
    9,558
    Thanked
    12,689
    Reviews
    0
    Achievements:Topaz Star - 500 postsAmber Star - 2,000 postsAmethyst Star - 5,000 postsEmerald Star - 10,000 posts
    Awards:
    Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 9/1/15Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 7/11/14Busiest Member of the Week - week ended 3/10/14100 Posts in a week

    Default Spinoff - when does it become okay to judge?

    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia&Hannah View Post
    And I think Rachel finch is a blooming genius! I see no difference in her actions compared to a family where the kids go to daycare 4-5 days FT and are asleep 7-7 or thereabouts. How much waking time do they have with their kids all week?
    Are you really comparing parents putting their kids in childcare so they can EARN A LIVING with someone who sends their kid elsewhere so they can ?relax?with the hubby? ....

    I apologise if I have Mis-interpreted your post however it reads to me like you're having a judgey dig at parents who (unlike you) work outside the home and whose kids sleep 7am-7pm. Which would be ironic given the purpose of this thread. Apologies again if I have misinterpreted - if I have worst case scenario this presents an opportunity for you to clarify so those working mummies out there reading along don't feel do bad.
    Last edited by VicPark; 12-05-2016 at 22:30.


 

Similar Threads

  1. Spinoff:
    By Jontu in forum Social Issues
    Replies: 79
    Last Post: 11-03-2016, 19:29
  2. All hail Netflix ***spinoff***
    By Moxy in forum General Chat
    Replies: 19
    Last Post: 12-08-2015, 14:42

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
free weekly newsletters | sign up now!
who are these people who write great posts? meet our hubbub authors!
Learn how you can contribute to the hubbub!

reviews
learn how you can become a reviewer!

competitions

forum - chatting now
christmas gift guidesee all Red Stocking
WaterWipes
Give your babies bottom a gift this Xmas! They are the only wipe made using just water and a drop of grapefruit seed extract and may help avoid nappy rash. Check out the great reviews on bubhub and see our website for more info and availability.
sales & new stuffsee all
Bub Hub Sales Listing
HAVING A SALE? Let parents know about it with a Bub Hub Sales listing. Listings are featured on our well trafficked Sales Page + selected randomly to appear on EVERY page
featured supporter
Wendys Music School
Wendy’s Music School. Experience, Quality and great service! For qualifying students we will get you playing or singing your favourite music in 90 days GUARANTEED! Book a free assessment online now!
gotcha
X

Pregnant for the first-time?

Not sure where to start? We can help!

Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!