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  1. #21
    ~Marigold~'s Avatar
    ~Marigold~ is offline You make me happy, when skies are grey
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    OP just another thought I had re you giving the diary to her cousin; I personally wouldn't do that. I think this could cause unwarranted resentment towards the cousin from your DD and at such a tender age could have her thinking "I'm the bad kid, my cousin is good". (which isn't true, her actions were bad yes, but I wouldn't involve the cousin to demonstrate this).
    I absolutely agree with not allowing her to keep the diary and telling her the behaviour is unacceptable and perhaps taking something she cherishes away from her for a couple of weeks to show her how the little party girl is now missing out on the present intended for her so your DD can get a feel for how it feels to miss out on something.
    Just my opinion though, I do see where you're coming from though.

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    Jontu  (15-05-2016)

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    Yes normal, but yes she should be punished in my opinion, or at least that's what I would do in that situation. The punishment wouldn't be harsh, but enough to make my son regret telling the lie, particularly such an elaborate deception and not owning up to it after multiple chances to tell the truth.

    By the end of the day, she is just a 6yr old kid and kids of that age tell fibs all the time. They also steal and cheat and hide things from you from time to time. My 4.5yr old does this too sometimes. As long as there are consequences and they know it's wrong, and they aren't doing it all the time, I don't think you should worry.

    Speaking of telling lies, when I was your DD's age, my brother who is 2yrs older than me had an argument with his teacher in school that resulted in the teacher manhandling him. I can't remember the exact circumstances but there was definite rough grabbing of his arm and possible shoving.

    When my brother told my mum about this, she was absolutely shocked and furious and I remember feeling really jealous that he was getting so much attention. I then proceeded to tell my mum an elaborate lie about how my teacher kicked me in the butt. 😱😱😱😐😐😐 well you can imagine the embarrassment for my mum and myself when she marched into the school and started making accusations about the school's abusive staff members.

    My brothers teacher was in a lot of trouble but I remember myself wanting the ground to open up and swallow me whole. I'm not sure what I expected would happen after telling such a huge lie, what scenario I imagined would play out other than the one that did eventually. I was in soooooo much trouble lol

    And I'm not a sociopath or a bad person. I just wanted to get the attention that my brother was getting.

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    Jontu  (15-05-2016),JustJaq  (15-05-2016)

  5. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by ~Marigold~ View Post
    OP just another thought I had re you giving the diary to her cousin; I personally wouldn't do that. I think this could cause unwarranted resentment towards the cousin from your DD and at such a tender age could have her thinking "I'm the bad kid, my cousin is good". (which isn't true, her actions were bad yes, but I wouldn't involve the cousin to demonstrate this).
    I absolutely agree with not allowing her to keep the diary and telling her the behaviour is unacceptable and perhaps taking something she cherishes away from her for a couple of weeks to show her how the little party girl is now missing out on the present intended for her so your DD can get a feel for how it feels to miss out on something.
    Just my opinion though, I do see where you're coming from though.
    Only reason I am giving it to dd cousin is because my sister is helping us out with some painting so the kids will be playing together. I am telling her it's a small thankyou gift for her help. I am not bringing what my dd into it.
    Thanks though for your opinion. I do agree that I wouldn't want dd thinking she is bad and her cousin is good. ☺

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    ~Marigold~  (15-05-2016)

  7. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by witherwings View Post
    Yes normal, but yes she should be punished in my opinion, or at least that's what I would do in that situation. The punishment wouldn't be harsh, but enough to make my son regret telling the lie, particularly such an elaborate deception and not owning up to it after multiple chances to tell the truth.

    By the end of the day, she is just a 6yr old kid and kids of that age tell fibs all the time. They also steal and cheat and hide things from you from time to time. My 4.5yr old does this too sometimes. As long as there are consequences and they know it's wrong, and they aren't doing it all the time, I don't think you should worry.

    Speaking of telling lies, when I was your DD's age, my brother who is 2yrs older than me had an argument with his teacher in school that resulted in the teacher manhandling him. I can't remember the exact circumstances but there was definite rough grabbing of his arm and possible shoving.

    When my brother told my mum about this, she was absolutely shocked and furious and I remember feeling really jealous that he was getting so much attention. I then proceeded to tell my mum an elaborate lie about how my teacher kicked me in the butt. 😱😱😱😐😐😐 well you can imagine the embarrassment for my mum and myself when she marched into the school and started making accusations about the school's abusive staff members.

    My brothers teacher was in a lot of trouble but I remember myself wanting the ground to open up and swallow me whole. I'm not sure what I expected would happen after telling such a huge lie, what scenario I imagined would play out other than the one that did eventually. I was in soooooo much trouble lol

    And I'm not a sociopath or a bad person. I just wanted to get the attention that my brother was getting.
    Thanks for sharing. Sorry but I couldn't help but have a giggle when you said the teacher kicked you in the butt 😁

    I have said to dd that if she does something like that again she won't be allowed to go to the party.

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    witherwings  (15-05-2016)


 

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